Votto
Diamond Member
- Oct 31, 2012
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In a shocking turn of event, Joe Biden has decided to pardon Ryan Day, Coach of the Ohio State Buckeyes for his historic loss against Michigan.
"Folks listen", said Joe Biden. "Like my son Hunter, Ryan is an absolute loser. A man who had more talent on his Ohio State squad than any other coach in Ohio State history, and playing against an unranked Michigan team. But deep down, I think Ryan is a good kid, and unfairly targeted by fans and the media, even though he can never seem to beat Michigan and always loses the big games. Sure, Ohio State was ranked #2 and Michigan was unranked and could not beat their way out of a wet paper bag, but.so what? As of today, I'm making sure Ohio State cannot fire Ryan in the foreseeable future with my pardon."...................(starts to walk away from the mic but returns...................
"Reminds me of how they wanted to replace me, you know, Kamala and Barak. There is more to life than just losing. Reminds me of hitting age 80 and losing all the hair on my legs. In fact, kids used to come up and rub those legs at the public pool. as I.............(Mic goes dead and security is called to end interview).
