Zone1 I Want to Fundamentally Change My Wife

[DonGlock26]

I love my wife with all my heart, but she has done some things in the past that I am not happy with.
I think she needs to fundamentally change. Can you love someone, if you need them to change
fundamentally?

 

[RoshawnMarkwees]

I love my wife with all my heart, but she has done some things in the past that I am not happy with.
I think she needs to fundamentally change. Can you love someone, if you need them to change
fundamentally?

You mean, like, transition?

 

[ozro]

I heard about this place where they can help you with your problems.
I think it's a town called Stepford CT. Ask for Ira.

 

[DonGlock26]

You mean, like, transition?

No, just fundamental change. Not a plumbing change.

 

[DonGlock26]

I heard about this place where they can help you with your problems.
I think it's a town called Stepford CT. Ask for Ira.

So your answer is no?

 

[Eman623]

My advice is to fundamentally change yourself instead to accept your wife as she is.

 

[DonGlock26]

My advice is to fundamentally change yourself instead to accept your wife as she is.

So, that sounds like a no. Thank you.

 

[Eman623]

So, that sounds like a no. Thank you.

Not what I said, but whatever.

The premise of your question is unanswerable.

You can't fundamentally change another person. I wouldn't want to live in a world where it was even possible.

OTOH, you can change yourself. In fact you are the only person who you can fundamentally change.

As to whether you can love your wife despite being unable to fundamentally change her - that sounds like a you thing. And it sounds like a question each person needs to figure out for themselves. Go figure it out and let us know what you come with,

 

[DonGlock26]

Not what I said, but whatever.

The premise of your question is unanswerable.

You can't fundamentally change another person. I wouldn't want to live in a world where it was even possible.

OTOH, you can change yourself. In fact you are the only person who you can fundamentally.

As to whether you can love your wife despite being unable to fundamentally change her - that sounds like a you thing. And it sounds like a question each person needs to figure out for themselves. Go figure it out and let us know what you come with,

Listening to you, I believe that you are leaning towards the no answer. Thanks.

 

[JLW]

Given that you have 20,000 posts in less than 2 years, she is probably screaming at you to get off that damn forum!

I've heard that before!

 

[Eman623]

Listening to you, I believe that you are leaning towards the no answer. Thanks.

My answer is there is no one answer.

 

[DonGlock26]

Given that you have 20,000 posts in less than 2 years, she is probably screaming at you to get off that damn forum!

I've heard that before!

Take a crack at the poll question, if you may.

 

[citygator]

I love my wife with all my heart, but she has done some things in the past that I am not happy with.
I think she needs to fundamentally change. Can you love someone, if you need them to change
fundamentally?

You can love someone but you can’t change them. - Citygator

 

[DonGlock26]

My answer is there is no one answer.

The question does not involve actual change, which seems to be your objection. The question is about love.

 

[DonGlock26]

You can love someone but you can’t change them. - Citygator

Fair enough, but do you really love someone, if you want them to fundamentally change?

 

[Woodznutz]

Rationalize the situation.

 

[JLW]

Take a crack at the poll question, if you may.

Your poll question is very hard to answer. Love can conquer all however the second choice is harder. Because I do not know the specifics. What do you mean by "fundamentally change?" Is it her personality, her work, her attitude, her appearance...it could be many things: some may be subject to change or acceptance, some not.

 

[Woodznutz]

I love my wife with all my heart, but she has done some things in the past that I am not happy with.
I think she needs to fundamentally change. Can you love someone, if you need them to change
fundamentally?

My wife had all sorts of faults, but I married her anyway and never allowed them to affect our marriage. One of her faults was constantly finding fault with others. Sadly, she couldn't ignore my faults and eventually divorced me.

 

[citygator]

Fair enough, but do you really love someone, if you want them to fundamentally change?

Anyone with a drug addicted kid can tell you yes.

 

[RoshawnMarkwees]

My wife is hot and has the sex drive of a man.
I’m happily married and in no need of fundamental transformation.