Actually I stated clearly and plainly what I believe.
You on the other hand have weaselled your way out of saying anything definite, leading me to think you have no clear beliefs at all.
No "weaseling"; perhaps frustratingly clear I do not buy your conclusions about everything about God being "bunk." The bottom line is that you do not believe in God. You claim there is nothing there, so we have 'nothing' to discuss.
I will say this. It appears you were seeking God in power--an all-powerful God--you said. And you did not find Him. Thousands of years ago, someone else--a prophet--was seeking God in what is mighty and powerful. He did not find Him there. And neither did you.
Elijah discovered God in the tiniest whisper. Jesus was not powerful, he was vulnerable, and he was found among the vulnerable. He did not seek an audience among the powerful, the rich, or the famous. He went to the poor, the lost, the powerless and spoke with them.
I wasn't even in school yet when I decided I wanted to meet and experience God the way people in the Old Testament did. My parents indulgently told me that God no longer met people that way. Being a child, I decided I would just change God's mind. God still can be found. Learn from Elijah. If you truly want to 'see' God, start with the tiniest whisper--and don't overlook vulnerability, either.