turbofish
Gold Member
- Apr 19, 2021
- 349
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My officially step father died last week [might have been the week before - I wasn't paying attention]. OK, he was never really a step father to me. My mom married my dad's best friend 8 years after my father died which was many decades ago. Sure, I have known him since I was 5 since he lived behind us all those years ago and he was always always in the picture growing up. Family vacation were taken with his family, memories made but crap, that decades ago. My daughter, 26 years old, my niece 27 years never knew my dad, but were somewhat familiar with him. They each saw him maybe once every other year.
Father died around 35 years ago, mother died last year. Bob has had rather quickly formed alzheimer's about a year ago.
Thinking about skipping the funeral as I see no cost to benefit ratio in my favor. I have closure having being able to talk to him at my mothers death bed 8 months ago. I was kept out of decisions concerning either one due to weird power of attorney that was handed to the youngest siblings on both sides [I'm the eldest, my old friend and weirdly step brother were both kept out of all decision while our younger sisters took over the show]
As I can see it, funerals are only for closure [no problem with me] or to see family and friends, both of which I really don't see myself sacrificing a whole day of work to drive 600 mile round trip [officially not that big of a sacrifice - I like to drive] to go see someone that I already have closure and I have no desire to see any of the younger siblings. I just can't see a reason to go. No benefit to me, I don't give a crap about the people who it would give benefit too, January is always a super tight month for both my wife and I.
Why do people go to funerals?
Just got word from my daughter - It just isn't worth it. Tend to agree with her.
Father died around 35 years ago, mother died last year. Bob has had rather quickly formed alzheimer's about a year ago.
Thinking about skipping the funeral as I see no cost to benefit ratio in my favor. I have closure having being able to talk to him at my mothers death bed 8 months ago. I was kept out of decisions concerning either one due to weird power of attorney that was handed to the youngest siblings on both sides [I'm the eldest, my old friend and weirdly step brother were both kept out of all decision while our younger sisters took over the show]
As I can see it, funerals are only for closure [no problem with me] or to see family and friends, both of which I really don't see myself sacrificing a whole day of work to drive 600 mile round trip [officially not that big of a sacrifice - I like to drive] to go see someone that I already have closure and I have no desire to see any of the younger siblings. I just can't see a reason to go. No benefit to me, I don't give a crap about the people who it would give benefit too, January is always a super tight month for both my wife and I.
Why do people go to funerals?
Just got word from my daughter - It just isn't worth it. Tend to agree with her.