E.T. The Equity-Terrestrial

excalibur

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Mar 19, 2015
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Just a face-palm moment of utter foolishness.



“SETI” is the acronym for “Search for Extraterrestrial Intelligence,” the scientific field devoted to exploring the universe for sentience.

Well, it used to be.

Last week, physicist Lawrence Krauss, founder of ASU’s Origins Project, revealed that, thanks to affirmative-action hiring, SETI’s gone woke, to the extent that (and this is not a joke) scientists have been told they can no longer use the word “intelligence” regarding extraterrestrial life, because “intelligence” is a “white construct.”

This leaves SETI in a bit of a (def) jam: With all that SETI stationary and monogrammed lab coats, it would be too expensive to start fresh with a new acronym (like SETGG: Search for Extraterrestrial Gentle Giants, or SETHS: Search for Extraterrestrial Honor Students, or even SETK: Search for Extraterrestrial Kangz).

Scientists must find a new use for the “I” that will appeal to blacks.

Illiterate? Illegitimate (as in progeny)? Indica? Or maybe just Ibram Kendi.

With “intelligence” gone from SETI, Steven Spielberg is rebooting one of his early classics. Now titled Close Encounters of the Tard Kind, the film will detail the arrival of E.T. (Ebonic Traveler).

Krauss: “Greetings, friend! What brings you to Earth?”

E.T.: “I smellded McD’s. Gimme.”

Krauss: “I’ll call UberEats!”

(20 minutes later)

Krauss: “Here you go, intergalactic visitor! A dozen large-size meals.”

E.T.: “COLD FRIES! COLD FRIES! DEEE-STROY DEEE-STROY!

A terrible fate for mankind. But as Krauss was a friend and defender of Jeffrey Epstein, if the alien visitors had been under 18 in Earth years, the terrible fate might’ve been theirs.


 

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