- Sep 22, 2013
- 4,956
- 250
- 85
This is a TrumpUSA Christmastime fable inspired by Jingle All the Way!
Cheers (signing off),
====
"U.S. President Donald Trump was interested to see how consumerism-festivity would enhance Christmastime shopping and fuel the American economy in a sensitive time in globalization politics. President Trump tweeted about the online distribution of Christian imagery (e.g., Jesus and Magdalene) and how marketing contributed to social values dialogue. It was ironic that President Trump who was otherwise a conservative pro-capitalist was espousing ideas about open communication about consumerism frills."
"Unfortunately, the Devil (Satan) sent two ministers of anarchy and terrorism to add some 'deadly spice' to this Christmas 2018 equation/formula. These two minions were Lilandra (a prophetess of fascism) and Gray Goblin (a messenger of terrorism). Lilandra was sending hypnotizing whispers about the reality of consumer-avarice and 'cholesterol-consciousness' during the holidays, since Burger King holiday specials catered to gluttony. Gray Goblin was talking about anti-capitalism terrorism in the Middle East which might fuel deadly forms of anti-institutional violence (perhaps directed at Christmastime-iconic social 'targets' in America such as the ice-rink in Rockefeller Center in NYC!)."
"Fortunately, God sent his angel Gabriel who disguised himself as the comic book mutant character Scorpion (Mac Gargan). Mac was an army soldier who was transformed into a toxin-spouting mutant man-creature called Scorpion because of an experimental new serum. Gabriel/Scorpion was climbing up the buildings of NYC near Christmastime 2018, trying to remind American consumers that Lilandra and the Goblin were not accurate about capitalism-oriented vices/sins such as gluttony and wrath. Scorpion wanted Americans to instead think about the 'high-fashions' promoted by Christmas-shoppers looking for chic and colorful sweaters to buy for friends and family. Who would win this argument?"
"President Trump was intrigued by this exchange between Lilandra/Goblin and Scorpion, so he asked his friend Will Theodore Randolph (WTR) who was making a new Christmas-shopping dollar-bill ad/flyer meant to promote consumerism-enthusiasm despite social stigmas about 'fat American tycoons' benefiting from Christmastime consumerism. WTR told Trump he'd help Scorpion's 'cause' by distributing 'Warrant-Sign' ads/flyers about his message that Christmas consumerism did not fuel the avarice of fat wealthy corporate tycoons. However, what WTR did not know was that Lilandra/Goblin schemed to make consumers feel 'anxious' about Christmastime homeless people in NYC starving for Burger King cheeseburgers. This was a Great Tribulation."
"In retaliation, Scorpion decided to drop millions of red LEGO blocks on Times Square (NYC) as Christmas Eve approached. Scorpion told Americans that the red LEGO blocks symbolized the blood-flow of American capitalism and the deeds of the Christian saints in promoting holiday-season family values that contributed to more 'ethical' forms of shopping/consumerism. The red LEGO blocks were scooped up by the children of NYC who spent hours right on the street making buildings and cars and toys, as NYPD cops monitored and provided traffic control. This was a rather imaginative Christmastime trophy for TrumpUSA(!)."
"Finally, Lilandra/Goblin conceded spiritual defeat and retreated and returned to their dominion in Hell. Scorpion (Gabriel) thanked American consumers for helping him spread Christmastime cheer and Christian spirit. President Trump thanked Scorpion for helping Americans find holiday-season joy during a time of great commercial vanity. Scorpion presented the White House with a lovely bottle of Vermont Maple Syrup which the First Lady (Melania Trump) might use to host a handsome Christmas lunch/dinner. God was pleased."
"President Trump realized that with all this Christmas energy/enthusiasm and 'intrigue' regarding 'strange characters' (e.g., Lilandra/Goblin/Gabriel) roaming around America as 'angels with slingshots,' there would be some nice entertainment industry marketing boons for the comic book industry. Comic books, after all, provided the entertainment industry with terrific pedestrian-friendly easy-to-read adventure-stories featuring all kinds of spirit-characters such as Harley Quinn, Plastic Man, Captain America, and Spider-Woman. President Trump decided to distribute copies of the Harley Quinn Holiday Special (DC Comics) for Christmas to underprivileged youth in Philadelphia, D.C., and NYC."
TRUMP: Christmas always generates heroes.
CARTER: The media contributed to the journalism vibrancy.
TRUMP: Yes, and our comics-distribution promoted entertainment!
CARTER: Consumerism offers boons about lifestyle enthusiasm.
TRUMP: We have to be wary of 'Burger King cholesterol.'
CARTER: However, we can revel in 'Netflix tobacco.'
====
Cheers (signing off),
====
"U.S. President Donald Trump was interested to see how consumerism-festivity would enhance Christmastime shopping and fuel the American economy in a sensitive time in globalization politics. President Trump tweeted about the online distribution of Christian imagery (e.g., Jesus and Magdalene) and how marketing contributed to social values dialogue. It was ironic that President Trump who was otherwise a conservative pro-capitalist was espousing ideas about open communication about consumerism frills."
"Unfortunately, the Devil (Satan) sent two ministers of anarchy and terrorism to add some 'deadly spice' to this Christmas 2018 equation/formula. These two minions were Lilandra (a prophetess of fascism) and Gray Goblin (a messenger of terrorism). Lilandra was sending hypnotizing whispers about the reality of consumer-avarice and 'cholesterol-consciousness' during the holidays, since Burger King holiday specials catered to gluttony. Gray Goblin was talking about anti-capitalism terrorism in the Middle East which might fuel deadly forms of anti-institutional violence (perhaps directed at Christmastime-iconic social 'targets' in America such as the ice-rink in Rockefeller Center in NYC!)."
"Fortunately, God sent his angel Gabriel who disguised himself as the comic book mutant character Scorpion (Mac Gargan). Mac was an army soldier who was transformed into a toxin-spouting mutant man-creature called Scorpion because of an experimental new serum. Gabriel/Scorpion was climbing up the buildings of NYC near Christmastime 2018, trying to remind American consumers that Lilandra and the Goblin were not accurate about capitalism-oriented vices/sins such as gluttony and wrath. Scorpion wanted Americans to instead think about the 'high-fashions' promoted by Christmas-shoppers looking for chic and colorful sweaters to buy for friends and family. Who would win this argument?"
"President Trump was intrigued by this exchange between Lilandra/Goblin and Scorpion, so he asked his friend Will Theodore Randolph (WTR) who was making a new Christmas-shopping dollar-bill ad/flyer meant to promote consumerism-enthusiasm despite social stigmas about 'fat American tycoons' benefiting from Christmastime consumerism. WTR told Trump he'd help Scorpion's 'cause' by distributing 'Warrant-Sign' ads/flyers about his message that Christmas consumerism did not fuel the avarice of fat wealthy corporate tycoons. However, what WTR did not know was that Lilandra/Goblin schemed to make consumers feel 'anxious' about Christmastime homeless people in NYC starving for Burger King cheeseburgers. This was a Great Tribulation."
"In retaliation, Scorpion decided to drop millions of red LEGO blocks on Times Square (NYC) as Christmas Eve approached. Scorpion told Americans that the red LEGO blocks symbolized the blood-flow of American capitalism and the deeds of the Christian saints in promoting holiday-season family values that contributed to more 'ethical' forms of shopping/consumerism. The red LEGO blocks were scooped up by the children of NYC who spent hours right on the street making buildings and cars and toys, as NYPD cops monitored and provided traffic control. This was a rather imaginative Christmastime trophy for TrumpUSA(!)."
"Finally, Lilandra/Goblin conceded spiritual defeat and retreated and returned to their dominion in Hell. Scorpion (Gabriel) thanked American consumers for helping him spread Christmastime cheer and Christian spirit. President Trump thanked Scorpion for helping Americans find holiday-season joy during a time of great commercial vanity. Scorpion presented the White House with a lovely bottle of Vermont Maple Syrup which the First Lady (Melania Trump) might use to host a handsome Christmas lunch/dinner. God was pleased."
"President Trump realized that with all this Christmas energy/enthusiasm and 'intrigue' regarding 'strange characters' (e.g., Lilandra/Goblin/Gabriel) roaming around America as 'angels with slingshots,' there would be some nice entertainment industry marketing boons for the comic book industry. Comic books, after all, provided the entertainment industry with terrific pedestrian-friendly easy-to-read adventure-stories featuring all kinds of spirit-characters such as Harley Quinn, Plastic Man, Captain America, and Spider-Woman. President Trump decided to distribute copies of the Harley Quinn Holiday Special (DC Comics) for Christmas to underprivileged youth in Philadelphia, D.C., and NYC."
TRUMP: Christmas always generates heroes.
CARTER: The media contributed to the journalism vibrancy.
TRUMP: Yes, and our comics-distribution promoted entertainment!
CARTER: Consumerism offers boons about lifestyle enthusiasm.
TRUMP: We have to be wary of 'Burger King cholesterol.'
CARTER: However, we can revel in 'Netflix tobacco.'
====
