A Really Funny Interview With A Conservative Blogger

[Annie]

The whole thing is hilarious, seriously. Of course, I found this not as funny part to excerpt because it reminded me so much of some here. Read the whole thing:

http://www.humaneventsonline.com/ri...itle=qaamp_a_with_greg_gutfeld_the_cool_conse

Q&A With Greg Gutfeld: The Cool Conservative
by Robert B. Bluey — 06-16-2006 @ 01:05 AM

Greg Gutfeld has edited some of the world's most recognizable magazines -- Men's Health, Stuff and UK Maxim -- but now he's making a name for himself on the Internet, first as the conservative blogger on the liberal Huffington Post and now as the creator of the brand-new (and hilarious) Daily Gut.

Between drinks at a London watering hole this week, Gutfeld found the time to answer a bunch of questions explaining who he is, what he's doing and how he got to be where he is today.

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How do you define your politics? When and why did you become a conservative?

I was a lefty in high school—which is normal because it’s a romantic thing to do—being a crusading lib makes everything in the world about YOU and YOUR FEELINGS. Which coincides nicely with being a teenager. It’s all about speaking truth to power, which translated, means, LOOK AT ME. It’s OK when kids do it—but it’s gross when adults do it, because you really should have grown out of that stage. This is why so many celebs become lefties when they hit their 27th birthday—their growth was stunted. The celebs who are righties tend to have lived a lot more than the others.



Anyway, I was in a debate in high school, on the pros and cons of mutually assured destruction. I took the con side, since I was anti-nuke. This guy Jeff Philliber took the pros. Jeff was kind of a nerd. I wasn’t. Sorry Jeff, but it was true. But anyway, I breezed through my opening remarks. Then Jeff wipes the floor, the windows, the lockers, and the small of his back with me. It’s really weird to be in a debate, and to realize the other person is dead right. So I did something cheap and sleazy. I played to the crowd with wisecracks—and I can’t remember how I did this.

I had a friend of mine send a note to the classroom to say I had an emergency at home. So I was able to leave. I came back in the end, and the class voted on the outcome and I won the debate. This is 23 years ago, and I still remember the whole thing. I bet Jeff Philliber doesn’t! But at that point I realized I was an imposter. And if an imposter can hold liberal beliefs so easily, then they aren’t really beliefs. I prove that at the Huffington Post daily.

This happened at Serra High School in San Mateo, where Barry Bonds went to high school. So did Bill Keller.

Keller and I had the same jobs—both editing the Serra Friar. But we were years apart. I did a far better job than him. And even now, in 2006, I bet that still bothers him. He won’t return my calls.

Or my shirt.

Anyway, the parents had no idea what was going on at the school. In religion class you could get extra credit if you campaigned for the Nuclear Freeze. That meant getting signatures outside of church for some petition. I did it, and raised my grade to an A. I was shameless.

I remember being at St. Gregory’s, getting signatures, and people just signing it because they knew me. Some refused. I didn’t care. I needed something like five pages of signatures. The teacher was also the soccer coach. He cut me after I broke my foot. I never forgave him for that.



Are you a fan of President Bush?

I am not a “fan” of Bush, since right now that’s pretty much impossible. I am less a fan of the alternatives to Bush (notably the Democrat candidates), the press and even less a fan of the pre-pre-electoral system that puts political hacks like Gore, Kerry and Bush in positions of power and influence. Do you know what I am a fan of? I am a fan of our nation, our military, and the band Clinic. I urge all of you to go out and buy their CDs. Also, the Melvins. I am a fan of the Melvins and the song “Honey Bucket,” in particular. And Broadcast. Ladytron.

Another great band. I could go on. Also, go see the movie Dead Man’s Shoes. It’s the best movie of the last five years. By Shane Meadows and Paddy Considine.

You will not regret it. It’s wonderfully violent, and contains the greatest drug scene ever committed to film.

This is what I am not a fan of:

• Raisin in sauces or desserts

• The edges of my fingers after I bite my nails too far down

• Mike Patton’s Peeping Tom CD. I was looking forward to this for years, and it did not live up to my inflated expectations

• The smell of the interior of a lunchbox that’s been left out in the sun.

It’s getting hot in here. Do you mind if I take off my shirt?

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