luddie if you are searching...this is not the place to do it....she is as false as scientology
If Luddly is searching for Jesus Christ - the Scriptures of the King James Version Bible is where to go to find the answers. Not the occult, Strollingbones.
What has the occult done for you other than to fill your heart with bitterness and hatred for Christians and Jews? Your misery is not caused by me or any other born again Christian on this board. It is most certainly not caused by those in your life who are Christians - be that co workers - extended family - whoever - put the blame where it belongs, Strollingbones. Your misery is caused by your own rebellion against Jesus Christ. You are the mortal enemy of your own soul. Satan has blinded you from seeing the truth - you are living in darkness and this is why the light of the Gospel disturbs you so greatly. It is reminding you of something you do not want to consider. That without Christ you are like a condemned prisoner on death row awaiting your execution date. Once you leave this earth? You're doomed.
It will be too late to repent. Today is the day of Salvation for you. TODAY.
Your post vividly reminded me of something Gurnall once said back in the 1600's.
This is what he said,
William Gurnall:
To a sinner, the light of truth is more blistering than a desert sun at mid-day (John 3:19). He shuns to walk where it is shining, and when exposed to it, will spare no expense to get relief. Satan is always at his elbow, ready to help him find a way to hide from its penetrating rays. Does he hear the truth in a powerful sermon? Satan will sit alongside him in the pew and whisper nonsense to distract him. He may ask him his plans for dinner, or what is on the docket for tomorrow. And if the sermon gets too hot, the devil will lull his senses, and get him to snooze until service is over.
Suppose a man's conscience strains toward the truth. Satan may then send him to hear a cool preacher, whose senseless prattle will tickle his fancy rather than prick his conscience. Oh, he may preach from the word of God, but he does it gingerly. He is too cowardly to use the Sword of the Spirit in all its might and power, lest he "offend" some members of his congregation. Many who dare to handle the truth and even admire it when encased in a scabbard would faint on the spot to see it drawn and bared.
Both sin and darkness cause distress. What could the Egyptians do under the plague of darkness but sit still and hope it would pass?
A man in a state of sin (or a woman) is under the same plague. He can do nothing profitable until God lifts the darkness from his soul. The epitaph of every impenitent sinner could fitly read: "Here lies one who never did an hour's work for God."
And if he does God no service while kept in the darkness, neither can he help himself. Pity the man whose darkness hides the disservice he does to his own soul! He is like one who stands helplessly in a dark cellar, supposing himself trapped and doomed to die. But if a candle were lit, he would find the key to the door within easy reach. Christ is the candle that lights the way out of man's darkness.
William Gurnall - from Christian in Complete Armor - March 27 Dev.
Ask the LORD to forgive your sins, your wicked rebellion and agree with him about your current state (lost sinner) - ask Him to lift the darkness from your soul that you may see the truth of who He is and receive him as your Lord and Savior. (Romans 10:9,10)