GotZoom
Senior Member
There was a guy (perhaps Neal) who was caught by his neighbor having sex with a sheep. She called the police and had him arrested.
Before the trial, the guy didn't know what to do. He asked a friend of his for some advice.
His friend told him that the first thing he needed was a good lawyer.
"How do I find a good lawyer?" he (Neal) asked.
His friend replied, "Well, I know of two. The first one is real expensive but you are guaranteed to be found innocent." The second one is, well, you can afford him but I can't guarantee the outcome of the trial. One this is for sure though, he is great with juries - will definitely find a jury of your peers."
The guy didn't have any money so he picked the second one.
One the day of his trial, his lawyer began to question the witness, an elderly woman who lived across the street from the defendent.
"Tell the court room what you saw" he directed the witness.
"I looked outside my window and saw this man (pointed to the defendent) standing behind a sheep moving his hips. I didn't know what he was doing until he turned around with the sheet and I saw him."
"What did you see?" the attorney asked.
"He was....having sex with the sheep. He was moving back and forth and holding the sheet."
"Are you sure he was having sex with the sheet ma'am?"
"YES, I'm sure. I know what I saw!" she yelled.
The attorney then asked her, "What happened after he alledgedly finished having sex with the sheep ma'am?"
She replied, "Well, the sheep turned around and licked his...um...his um.....penis."
Just then, one of the jurors leaned to the juror next to him and said,
"A good sheep will do that, you know."
Before the trial, the guy didn't know what to do. He asked a friend of his for some advice.
His friend told him that the first thing he needed was a good lawyer.
"How do I find a good lawyer?" he (Neal) asked.
His friend replied, "Well, I know of two. The first one is real expensive but you are guaranteed to be found innocent." The second one is, well, you can afford him but I can't guarantee the outcome of the trial. One this is for sure though, he is great with juries - will definitely find a jury of your peers."
The guy didn't have any money so he picked the second one.
One the day of his trial, his lawyer began to question the witness, an elderly woman who lived across the street from the defendent.
"Tell the court room what you saw" he directed the witness.
"I looked outside my window and saw this man (pointed to the defendent) standing behind a sheep moving his hips. I didn't know what he was doing until he turned around with the sheet and I saw him."
"What did you see?" the attorney asked.
"He was....having sex with the sheep. He was moving back and forth and holding the sheet."
"Are you sure he was having sex with the sheet ma'am?"
"YES, I'm sure. I know what I saw!" she yelled.
The attorney then asked her, "What happened after he alledgedly finished having sex with the sheep ma'am?"
She replied, "Well, the sheep turned around and licked his...um...his um.....penis."
Just then, one of the jurors leaned to the juror next to him and said,
"A good sheep will do that, you know."