Wife reported missing to Police

[Sunni Man]

A husband went to the sheriff’s department to report
that his wife was missing.

Husband: My wife is missing. She went shopping yesterday and has not come home.
Sergeant: What is her height?
Husband: Gee, I’m not sure. A little over five-feet tall.
Sergeant: Weight?
Husband: Don’t know. Not slim, not really fat.
Sergeant: Color of eyes?
Husband: Never noticed.
Sergeant: Color of hair?
Husband: Changes a couple times a year. Maybe dark brown.
Sergeant: What was she wearing?
Husband: Could have been a skirt or shorts. I don’t remember exactly.
Sergeant: What kind of car did she go in?
Husband: She went in my truck.
Sergeant: What kind of truck was it?
Husband: Brand new 2015 Ford F150 King Ranch 4X4 with eco-boost 5.0L V8 engine special ordered with manual transmission. It has a custom matching white cover for the bed. Custom leather seats and “Bubba” floor mats. Trailering package with gold hitch. DVD with navigation, 21-channel CB radio, six cup holders, and four power outlets. Added special alloy wheels and off-road Michelins. Wife put a small scratch on the drivers door. At this point the husband started choking up.
Sergeant: Don’t worry buddy. We’ll find your truck.

 

[Bruce_T_Laney]

 

[Bruce_T_Laney]

 

[Auld Phart]

 

[Auld Phart]

 

[Bruce_T_Laney]

True Story:

I was about fourteen years old when the Aunt that was raising me told me never to speak to her again... So about six months later my Uncle came to me and told me either I would start talking to her ( the Aunt ) again or I would get a beating every day until I did, and I ask him why?

He looked at me and told me after six months of listening to her bitching it was my turn...

Not joking at all, and I still laugh at that!