The Bill of Non-Rights

[Jimmyeatworld]

I just got this in the mail, thought I'd share it.

ARTICLE I: You do not have the right to a new car, big screen TV, or any other form of wealth. More power to you if you can legally acquire them, but no one is guaranteeing anything.

ARTICLE II: You do not have the right to never be offended. This country is based on freedom, and that means freedom for everyone -- not just you! You may leave the room, turn the channel, express a different opinion, etc.; but the world is full of idiots, and probably always will be.

ARTICLE III: You do not have the right to be free from harm. If you stick a screwdriver in your eye, learn to be more careful, do not expect the tool manufacturer to make you and all your relatives independently wealthy.

ARTICLE IV: You do not have the right to free food and housing. Americans are the most charitable people to be found, and will gladly help anyone in need, but we are quickly growing weary of subsidizing generation after generation of professional couch potatoes who achieve nothing more than the creation of another generation of professional couch potatoes.

ARTICLE V: You do not have the right to free health care. That would be nice, but from the looks of public housing, we're just not interested in public health care.

ARTICLE VI: You do not have the right to physically harm other people. If you kidnap, rape, intentionally maim, or kill someone, don't be surprised if the rest of us want to see you fry in the electric chair.

ARTICLE VII: You do not have the right to the possessions of others. If you rob, cheat, or coerce away the goods or services of other citizens, don't be surprised if the rest of us get together and lock you away in a place where you still won't have the right to a big screen color TV or a life of leisure.

ARTICLE VIII: You do not have the right to a job. All of us sure want you to have a job, and will gladly help you along in hard times, but we expect you to take advantage of the opportunities of education and vocational training laid before you to make yourself useful.

ARTICLE IX: You do not have the right to happiness. Being an American means that you have the right to PURSUE happiness, which by the way, is a lot easier if you are unencumbered by an over abundance of idiotic laws created by those of you who were confused by the Bill of Rights.

ARTICLE X: This is an English speaking country. We don't care where you are from, English is our language. Learn it or go back to wherever you came from!

ARTICLE XI: You do not have the right to change our country's history or heritage. This country was founded on the belief in one true God. And yet, you are given the freedom to believe in any religion, any faith, or no faith at all; with no fear of persecution. The phrase IN GOD WE TRUST is part of our heritage and history, and if you are uncomfortable with it, TOUGH!!!!

 

[sagegirl]

You do have the right to: go to church, go to work, and go to the mall. Ahhhh.....life is so fulfilling

 

[Bullypulpit]

I just got this in the mail, thought I'd share it.

ARTICLE I: You do not have the right to a new car, big screen TV, or any other form of wealth. More power to you if you can legally acquire them, but no one is guaranteeing anything.

ARTICLE II: You do not have the right to never be offended. This country is based on freedom, and that means freedom for everyone -- not just you! You may leave the room, turn the channel, express a different opinion, etc.; but the world is full of idiots, and probably always will be.

ARTICLE III: You do not have the right to be free from harm. If you stick a screwdriver in your eye, learn to be more careful, do not expect the tool manufacturer to make you and all your relatives independently wealthy.

ARTICLE IV: You do not have the right to free food and housing. Americans are the most charitable people to be found, and will gladly help anyone in need, but we are quickly growing weary of subsidizing generation after generation of professional couch potatoes who achieve nothing more than the creation of another generation of professional couch potatoes.

ARTICLE V: You do not have the right to free health care. That would be nice, but from the looks of public housing, we're just not interested in public health care.

ARTICLE VI: You do not have the right to physically harm other people. If you kidnap, rape, intentionally maim, or kill someone, don't be surprised if the rest of us want to see you fry in the electric chair.

ARTICLE VII: You do not have the right to the possessions of others. If you rob, cheat, or coerce away the goods or services of other citizens, don't be surprised if the rest of us get together and lock you away in a place where you still won't have the right to a big screen color TV or a life of leisure.

ARTICLE VIII: You do not have the right to a job. All of us sure want you to have a job, and will gladly help you along in hard times, but we expect you to take advantage of the opportunities of education and vocational training laid before you to make yourself useful.

ARTICLE IX: You do not have the right to happiness. Being an American means that you have the right to PURSUE happiness, which by the way, is a lot easier if you are unencumbered by an over abundance of idiotic laws created by those of you who were confused by the Bill of Rights.

ARTICLE X: This is an English speaking country. We don't care where you are from, English is our language. Learn it or go back to wherever you came from!

ARTICLE XI: You do not have the right to change our country's history or heritage. This country was founded on the belief in one true God. And yet, you are given the freedom to believe in any religion, any faith, or no faith at all; with no fear of persecution. The phrase IN GOD WE TRUST is part of our heritage and history, and if you are uncomfortable with it, TOUGH!!!!

Aritcle XI is a myth perpetrated by those who would give us a theocracy on the model of the Puritans of Massachusetts, or perhaps even the Taliban in Afghanistan.

 

[insein]

Aritcle XI is a myth perpetrated by those who would give us a theocracy on the model of the Puritans of Massachusetts, or perhaps even the Taliban in Afghanistan.

And yet there hasnt been a theocracy started by this country in the 229 years of its existence. Imagine that. Your argument holds no weight bully. Because until a law or constitutional ammendment prohibits the practice of any religion then your mythical theocracy doesnt exist and never will. The words "In god we trust" do not count as a theocracy. Atheists in this country are not rounded up, held against their will and persecuted for their belief that there isnt a god. When the time the government enacts that law, get back to me and youll have some credence to your claim.

 

[Hobbit]

And yet there hasnt been a theocracy started by this country in the 229 years of its existence. Imagine that. Your argument holds no weight bully. Because until a law or constitutional ammendment prohibits the practice of any religion then your mythical theocracy doesnt exist and never will. The words "In god we trust" do not count as a theocracy. Atheists in this country are not rounded up, held against their will and persecuted for their belief that there isnt a god. When the time the government enacts that law, get back to me and youll have some credence to your claim.

Actually, we're moving towards an atheistic secular/progressive theocracy, and the perpetrators are getting away with it by not recognizing atheism as a religion and claiming that members of other religions are offended by the presence of a religion.

 

[Jimmyeatworld]

Aritcle XI is a myth perpetrated by those who would give us a theocracy on the model of the Puritans of Massachusetts, or perhaps even the Taliban in Afghanistan.

Your post is bullshit perpetrated by those who exaggerate and don't know their history.

 

[Jimmyeatworld]

Actually, we're moving towards an atheistic secular/progressive theocracy, and the perpetrators are getting away with it by not recognizing atheism as a religion and claiming that members of other religions are offended by the presence of a religion.

True. Out of defiance, or maybe spite, I am doing the opposite.

I was never very religious, never so much as put up a Christmas tree for the holiday, didn't care one way or the other about prayer before events like high school football games. Over the last couple of years, I find myself defending what Freedom of Religion actually is, fighting for things like prayer before an event, and this Christmas you can bet there will be a manger scene in my front yard, and maybe a little tree just because big ones can get so messy.

 

[Annie]

Aritcle XI is a myth perpetrated by those who would give us a theocracy on the model of the Puritans of Massachusetts, or perhaps even the Taliban in Afghanistan.

I think Hutchinson and Williams pretty much wrote 'quash' on the Puritan model. Last I heard, Massachusettes did go along with the union. I heard tell they even contributed to the freeing of some Baptists and non-Christians during a war in the 1860s.

Bully, you are overstating here...