Shohei Ohtani and Taylor Swift get married

Votto

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Oct 31, 2012
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This just in, Taylor Swift and Shohei Ohtani got married yesterday. The Billion-dollar singer and close to billion-dollar baseball player rented the entire country of Costa Rica and got married. Locals had to move out for the week to give them their space into neighboring countries.

"The hard part was looking into those slanty eyes of his" said Taylor, "But my accountant assured me I was making the right decision."

Shohei was also interviewed and said, "She is hot, at least good for 5 more years or so before I move on, and by that time, as a couple we will have acquired a few more billion dollars, and who knows, maybe we buy the entire country of Costa Rica in 5 years instead of just renting it for our honeymoon. You know, kinda like how Oprah bought the island of Maui out from under everyone. Gee, I sure hope they don't have fires here."
 

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View attachment 871884

This just in, Taylor Swift and Shohei Ohtani got married yesterday. The Billion-dollar singer and close to billion-dollar baseball player rented the entire country of Costa Rica and got married. Locals had to move out for the week to give them their space into neighboring countries.

"The hard part was looking into those slanty eyes of his" said Taylor, "But my accountant assured me I was making the right decision."

Shohei was also interviewed and said, "She is hot, at least good for 5 more years or so before I move on, and by that time, as a couple we will have acquired a few more billion dollars, and who knows, maybe we buy the entire country of Costa Rica in 5 years instead of just renting it for our honeymoon. You know, kinda like how Oprah bought the island of Maui out from under everyone. Gee, I sure hope they don't have fires here."
She had to look at the "slanty eyes" but he had to look at a flat butt. Even Steven!!
 
View attachment 871884

This just in, Taylor Swift and Shohei Ohtani got married yesterday. The Billion-dollar singer and close to billion-dollar baseball player rented the entire country of Costa Rica and got married. Locals had to move out for the week to give them their space into neighboring countries.

"The hard part was looking into those slanty eyes of his" said Taylor, "But my accountant assured me I was making the right decision."

Shohei was also interviewed and said, "She is hot, at least good for 5 more years or so before I move on, and by that time, as a couple we will have acquired a few more billion dollars, and who knows, maybe we buy the entire country of Costa Rica in 5 years instead of just renting it for our honeymoon. You know, kinda like how Oprah bought the island of Maui out from under everyone. Gee, I sure hope they don't have fires here."
god has certainly favored ms swift and her new covenant husband. i am certain that ohtani expects a traditional marriage, mrs ohtani feet daintily bound, tip toeing delicately 3 steps behind his sword er bat arm
 
Swift is a good example of the phenomenon, beautiful but not attractive. Miley Cyrus, on the other hand, is homely as shit, but moderately attractive if I take off my glasses.
 

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