Millions disappointed it wasn't Jared

Discussion in 'Political Satire' started by DrLove, Oct 30, 2017.

  1. DrLove
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    DrLove VIP Member

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    Including me, but that's okay .. his day will come soon enough! :eusa_dance:

    WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Amid the general jubilation over the arrest of Paul Manafort on Monday, millions of Americans reported extreme disappointment that the first person arrested from Robert Mueller’s Russia probe was not Jared Kushner. Across the country, downcast Americans commiserated over the news that their choice for Mueller’s first indictment had been overlooked.

    “I know it makes me sound petty, since today is a day of national celebration,” Harland Dorrinson, who had been holding a Kushner-arrest-watch party in suburban Toledo, said. “But for a lot of us who had had our hopes set on Jared, today is bittersweet.”

    Tracy Klugian, who watched news of Manafort’s arrest from her home in San Jose, agreed. “Don’t get me wrong, I’m thrilled that Manafort’s being brought in,” she said. “But he’s no Jared.”

    Davis Logsdon, a clinical psychologist at the University of Minnesota Medical Center, said that he is counselling patients who are dealing with the “severe emotional letdown” of the first person arrested not being Jared.

    “I’m urging them to see this disappointment as an opportunity for growth,” Logsdon said. “It’s true that none of the first three arrests was Jared, but we have to live with that reality. And, perhaps, if we are patient, the fourth, fifth, or even fiftieth arrest will be Jared.”​

    Millions Disappointed It Wasn’t Jared
     
    • Funny and Agree!! Funny and Agree!! x 1
  2. andaronjim
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    andaronjim Gold Member

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    TRUMP, RUSSIA,TRUMP, RUSSIA,TRUMP, RUSSIA,TRUMP, RUSSIA,TRUMP, RUSSIA,TRUMP, RUSSIA,TRUMP, RUSSIA,TRUMP, RUSSIA,TRUMP, RUSSIA,TRUMP, RUSSIA,TRUMP, RUSSIA,TRUMP, RUSSIA,TRUMP, RUSSIA,TRUMP, RUSSIA,TRUMP, RUSSIA,TRUMP, RUSSIA,TRUMP, RUSSIA,TRUMP, RUSSIA,TRUMP, RUSSIA,TRUMP, RUSSIA,TRUMP, RUSSIA,TRUMP, RUSSIA,TRUMP, RUSSIA,TRUMP, RUSSIA,TRUMP, RUSSIA,TRUMP, RUSSIA,TRUMP, RUSSIA,TRUMP, RUSSIA,

     
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  3. rightwinger
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    rightwinger Award Winning USMB Paid Messageboard Poster Gold Supporting Member Supporting Member

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    Jareds time will come
     
  4. rightwinger
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    rightwinger Award Winning USMB Paid Messageboard Poster Gold Supporting Member Supporting Member

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    The STINK of Russian intervention lingers over the Trump Presidency
     
  5. WillHaftawaite
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    WillHaftawaite Freshman Moderator Staff Member Supporting Member

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    Borowitz?

    Bor-ing
     
  6. DarkFury
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    DarkFury Platinum Member Gold Supporting Member Supporting Member

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    Well if Hillary would leave the room so would the stink!
     
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  7. DrLove
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    DrLove VIP Member

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    You're forgiven -- We don't expect Trumplings to understand satire.
     
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  8. WillHaftawaite
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    WillHaftawaite Freshman Moderator Staff Member Supporting Member

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    That's a relief...

    I thought you were saying I didn't understand it//

    (PS, I've found Borowitz boring for years. He doesnt' write satire as much as he writes snark)
     
  9. Xelor
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    Xelor Gold Member

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    I realize the above sentiment is in the political satire subforum, but seriously....being disappointed that a person was not federally indicted is just wrong. It's really not the kind of thing to say, even jokingly, for it hints at one's character being driven by vengeance rather than by justice, the execution of which is not, for upstanding individuals, about vengeance or disdain on personal levels.
     
  10. DrLove
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    DrLove VIP Member

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    Yeah i guess you're right, my bad. It's a good thing that Trump isn't vindictive ;)
     

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