Lying lawyer pleads guilty to lying

[Preacher]

Michael Cohen, President Trump’s ex-lawyer, pleads guilty to lying to Congress about Trump real estate project in Russia

How shocking....lying lawyer lies AGAIN. Won't stop TDS inflicted morons from still believing him.

 

[Penelope]

He decided not to take a bullet for Trump.

 

[Preacher]

He decided not to take a bullet for Trump.

Lol....he has zero credibility left in a court of law...its hilarious...decides to snitch and then Mueller and his band of angry democrats turn on him instead..ROFLMAO!

 

[aaronleland]

Was he telling the truth every time he defended Trump, or is everything but that a lie?

 

[S.J.]

He's a back stabbing liar. Just the kind of guy Mueller depends on to keep his investigation alive.

 

[edthecynic]

He's a back stabbing liar. Just the kind of guy Mueller depends on to keep his investigation alive.

Donnie Dirtbag hires only the best people!!!

 

[S.J.]

He's a back stabbing liar. Just the kind of guy Mueller depends on to keep his investigation alive.

Donnie Dirtbag hires only the best people!!!

Which is why he would never hire you.

 

[edthecynic]

He's a back stabbing liar. Just the kind of guy Mueller depends on to keep his investigation alive.

Donnie Dirtbag hires only the best people!!!

Which is why he would never hire you.

Boy that sure went over your head!

 

[S.J.]

He's a back stabbing liar. Just the kind of guy Mueller depends on to keep his investigation alive.

Donnie Dirtbag hires only the best people!!!

Which is why he would never hire you.

Boy that sure went over your head!

No, you're just not very clever.

 

[EvilCat Breath]

Democrats want Cohen to lie. They just want him to tell lies to benefit Democrats.

 

[Biff_Poindexter]

Imagine if this was the Obama admin who had all of these indictments and convictions -- and Obama's personal lawyer was convicted....

I will imagine Trump lovers would be singing a different tune...

these are the same people who have finally admitted after years of worshipping Bush that going into Iraq was not a good idea....

If you want them to be honest about these Trump years -- you will have to wait until they pick their next cult leader

 

[2aguy]

Michael Cohen, President Trump’s ex-lawyer, pleads guilty to lying to Congress about Trump real estate project in Russia

How shocking....lying lawyer lies AGAIN. Won't stop TDS inflicted morons from still believing him.

Andrew McCarthy, the prosecutor who convicted the Blind Sheik pointed out that when all of your witnesses are being convicted of lying under oath...it ain't a great way to run an investigation......none of them are pleading to actual crimes that aren't generated by talking to the FBI and then getting caught in perjury traps....

Nothing to see here...wake us when some actual Russians show up...but they were to busy donating to hilary to bother with Trump.

 

[Roudy]

Michael Cohen, President Trump’s ex-lawyer, pleads guilty to lying to Congress about Trump real estate project in Russia

How shocking....lying lawyer lies AGAIN. Won't stop TDS inflicted morons from still believing him.

There is a reason for all these lawyer jokes....

Q: What’s the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?
A: The lawyer charges more.

Q: What's black and brown and looks good on an attorney?
A: A doberman pinscher.

Q. What's the difference between God and a lawyer?
A. God does not think he is a lawyer!

Q: Did you hear they just released a new Barbie doll called "Divorced Barbie"?
A: Yeah, it comes with half of Ken's things and alimony.

Q: What's the problem with lawyer jokes?
A: Lawyer's don't think they're funny, and no one else thinks they're jokes.

Q: Where can you find a good lawyer?
A: At the city morgue.

Q: What is the difference between a female lawyer and a pitbull?
A: Lipstick

Q: What's the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer?
A: A bad lawyer can let a case drag out for several years. A good lawyer can make it last even longer.

Q: What's the difference between a porcupine and a Mercedes Benz full of lawyers?
A: The porcupine has pricks on the outside.

Q: Why won't sharks attack lawyers?
A: Professional courtesy.

Q: What do you have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?
A: Not enough sand.

Q: How can you tell if a lawyer is well hung?
A: You can't get a finger between the rope and his neck!

Q: If you are stranded on a desert island with Adolph Hitler, Atilla the Hun, and a lawyer, and you have a gun with only two bullets, what do you do?
A: Shoot the lawyer twice.

Q: What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?
A: A good start!

Q: How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?
A: His lips are moving.

Q: What's the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?
A: There are skid marks in front of the dog.

Q: Why did God make snakes just before lawyers?
A: To practice.

Q: What's the difference between lawyers and buzzards?
A: Lawyers have removable wing tips.

Q: What's the definition of a lawyer?
A: A mouth with a life support system.

Q: What do you get when you cross a lawyer with a demon from hell?
A: No changes occur.

Q: What's the difference between God and an attorney?
A: God doesn't think he's an attorney.

Q: Why is going to a meeting of the Bar Association like going into a bait shop?
A: Because of the abundance of suckers, leeches, maggots and nightcrawlers

Q: Why are there so many lawyers in the U.S.?
A: Because St. Patrick chased the snakes out of Ireland.

Q: Why are lawyers like nuclear weapons?
A: When they land, they prevent anything from functioning for the next hundred years.

Q. What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?
A. A vampire only sucks blood at night.

Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish?
A: One is a slimy, bottom dwelling, scum sucker. The other is a fish.

Q. How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?
A. You need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.

Q: What do you call a smiling, sober, courteous person at a bar association convention?
A: The caterer.

Q: Why are lawyers like nuclear weapons?
A: If one side has one, the other side has to get one.

Q: Why are lawyers like nuclear weapons?
A: Once launched, they can't be recalled.

Q: How many lawyer jokes are there?
A: Just two, all the rest are true.

Q: How many lawyers does it take to stop a moving bus?
A: Never enough.

Q: Did you hear about the new microwave lawyer?
A: You spend eight minutes in his office and get billed as if you'd been there eight hours.

Q: What's the difference between a law firm and a circus?
A: At a circus, the clowns don't charge the public by the hour.

Q: How many lawyers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None, they'd rather keep their clients in the dark.

Q: What do lawyers do after they die?
A: They lie still.

Q: When attorneys die, why do they bury them 600 feet underground?
A: Because deep down, they're really nice guys.

Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?
A: You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.

Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a terrorist?
A: You can negotiate with a terrorist.

Q: What do you get if you put 100 lawyers in your basement?
A: A whine cellar.

Q: What do you call a lawyer gone bad?
A: Your honor.

Q: What do you call a lawyer with an I.Q. of 30?
A: A lawyer.

Q: What do you call a lawyer with an I.Q. of 80?
A: Your honor.

Q: What do you get when you cross a librarian with a lawyer?
A: All the information you need, but you can’t understand a word of it.

Q: What's worse than pleading guilty to murder?
A: Getting jail time and getting robbed--hiring an attorney to defend you.

Q: What do honest lawyers and UFOs have in common?
A: You always hear about them, but you never see them.

Q: What's the difference between a bankrupt attorney and a pigeon?
A: The pigeon can still make a deposit on a Mercedes.

Q: What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?
A: An offer you can't understand.

Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?
A: Lawyers accumulate frequent flyer points.

Q: What is a criminal lawyer?
A: Redundant.

Q: What's the difference between a good lawyer and a great lawyer?
A: A good lawyer knows the law. A great lawyer knows the judge.

Q: When lawyers die, why don't vultures them?
A: Even a vulture has taste.

Q: How many personal injury attorneys does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Three--one to turn the bulb, one to shake him off the ladder, and the third to sue the ladder company.

Q: Why does California have the most attorneys, and New Jersey have the most toxic waste dumps?
A: New Jersey got first pick.

Q: What's the difference between an attorney and a pit bull?
A: Jewelry.

Q: What do lawyers use for birth control?
A: Their personalities.

Q: What's the definition of mixed emotions?
A: Watching your attorney drive over a cliff in your new Ferrari.

Q: How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: One; the lawyer holds it while the rest of the world revolves around him.

Q: What happened to the banker who went to law school?
A: Now she’s a loan shark.

Q: Where do vampires learn to suck blood?
A: Law school.

Q: How do you prevent a Lawyer from drowning?
A: Shoot him before he hits the water!

Q: How was wire invented?
A: Two lawyers pulling on a penny.

Q: Why do lawyers wear tight ties?
A: So their foreskin doesn't creep up and cover their face.

Q: Why does the American Bar Association prohibit sex between attorneys and their clients?
A: To prevent the client for being billed twice for what is essentially the same service.

Q: What the difference between a lawyer and a prostitute?
A: The prostitute quits after you're dead!

Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, an honest lawyer and an old drunk are walking down the street together when they simultaneously spot a hundred dollar bill. Who gets it? The old drunk, of course, the other three are fantasy creatures.

At a convention of biological scientists, one researcher remarks to another, "Did you know that in our lab we have switched from mice to lawyers for our experiments?" "Really?" the other replied, "Why did you switch?" "Well, for three reasons. First we found that lawyers are far more plentiful, second, the lab assistants don't get so attached to them, and thirdly there are some things even a rat won't do."

 

[S.J.]

Q: What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?
A: His partner.

 

[MarcATL]

He decided not to take a bullet for Trump.

Lol....he has zero credibility left in a court of law...its hilarious...decides to snitch and then Mueller and his band of angry democrats turn on him instead..ROFLMAO!

How much credibility does your Trumpenfuhrer have in the court of law?

 

[Penelope]

He's a back stabbing liar. Just the kind of guy Mueller depends on to keep his investigation alive.

and Manafort is a good man and Trump has a lot of respect for him. Take Cohen and Manafort and turn them around and Cohen becomes a good man with a Trump having lots of respect for him, and Manafort become a weak , pathetic liar.

 

[MindWars]

Michael Cohen, President Trump’s ex-lawyer, pleads guilty to lying to Congress about Trump real estate project in Russia

How shocking....lying lawyer lies AGAIN. Won't stop TDS inflicted morons from still believing him.

Oh you mean all the infowars conspiracies are all actually HAPPENING lmfao......

The idiots just can't deny truth when it's in their faces....... they just dream up more lies.

 

[S.J.]

He's a back stabbing liar. Just the kind of guy Mueller depends on to keep his investigation alive.

and Manafort is a good man and Trump has a lot of respect for him. Take Cohen and Manafort and turn them around and Cohen becomes a good man with a Trump having lots of respect for him, and Manafort become a weak , pathetic liar.

Is that really the best you can do? lmao

 

[Penelope]

He's a back stabbing liar. Just the kind of guy Mueller depends on to keep his investigation alive.

and Manafort is a good man and Trump has a lot of respect for him. Take Cohen and Manafort and turn them around and Cohen becomes a good man with a Trump having lots of respect for him, and Manafort become a weak , pathetic liar.

Is that really the best you can do? lmao

Simple enough for Trump people to understand, I hope.

 

[whitehall]

If you indicted every freaking lawyer and politician who ever lied to Congress the federal prisons would be overflowing. It should be noted that Bill Clinton was convicted of lying under oath and democrats marched to the White House in support of the lying sleazy sexual predator.