I need advice, support or whatever...something...

[fuzzykitten99]

Here I am getting myself all worked up again about Nathan's development.

He had his assessment yesterday for Early Intervention, and they did determine that he does need help, as he got 31 out of 76 possible 'points' of development for his age group, so he's 'behind' age wise. So they are going to do another, more thorough assessment sometime within the next month. The actual classes would likely start in the fall, after he turns 3.

Now I am thinking that there is a bigger, underlying problem, and that maybe Nathan will never be fully independent because there is a bigger problem we haven't found. Maybe it's just the post partum hormones, but I feel like bursting into tears every time I think about it, and do most of the time. Maybe I am jumping to conclusions on this whole thing and the therapy will work just fine.

Did the fluid in his ears have THAT big of an impact to put him so far behind? I don't know what to do, I am so upset again. I know that only time will tell, but I want to know now.

I love him so much, I just want him to be a normal boy, doing all the things kids his age are supposed to be doing, including starting potty training.

I just want to have a normal boy, and it breaks my heart to think that he may not be.

 

[Said1]

PPH.

My daughter didn't really start talking until she was three. She could say a lot words, construct some basic sentances, understood just about everything, but it was VERY hard for others to understand her verbally. By the time she was four, there were maybe three letter combos she had trouble with, which were actually age appropriate in children who did not have prior speach and language delays.

Don't worry about it, you said yourself his speach has improved tremendously in a short period of time. And remember, therapists often want children to come in, recommend extra testing "just in case" and suggest a few sessions, which can often make you feel worse about your child's development. This is normal as monitoring your son's development is part of the assesment process.

What until next month, I bet he'll be saying more words, with greater clearity and this will be noticed by the person who is monitoring him. Go on line and print some speach and language exercises for you son to get you started.

The important thing is that he understands what you are saying to him, the words and sentances will come with practice and time. Now relax and eat some chocolate!

 

[dmp]

Fuck Tests. Fuck Child Psychologists. Fuck Normal. Your boy is NOT normal - he's special. Nathan will NOT be defined by some arbitrary test given when he is TWO years old. He's unique and wonderful and anyone who can't see his brilliance in his smile or his hug or his kiss can take a flying fuck off a bridge.

 

[Mr. P]

Fuck Tests. Fuck Child Psychologists. Fuck Normal. Your boy is NOT normal - he's special. Nathan will NOT be defined by some arbitrary test given when he is TWO years old. He's unique and wonderful and anyone who can't see his brilliance in his smile or his hug or his kiss can take a flying fuck off a bridge.

Yeah, what he said, and remember Fuzzy, the kid basicly couldn't hear for three years. He has alot of catchin up to do and it won't happen overnight. He just got the tubes, what, a month ago? Chill.

 

[5stringJeff]

Fuck Tests. Fuck Child Psychologists. Fuck Normal. Your boy is NOT normal - he's special. Nathan will NOT be defined by some arbitrary test given when he is TWO years old. He's unique and wonderful and anyone who can't see his brilliance in his smile or his hug or his kiss can take a flying fuck off a bridge.

F*(k yeah!

Seriously, though, dmp and Mr. P are right. Every child will develop at a different rate.

 

[Abbey Normal]

I think I posted this before, but just in case...

I have a nephew who had ear infections almost continually for the first two years of his life. He didn't really speak intelligibly at all or in any kind of sentences until he was four. He was finally potty trained at four as well.

Some of us thought he was autistic. For a few years after that, it was still very hard to understand him. That boy is now 14, speaks very well, excels in standardized testing, and is an honors student.

He just had to make up for lost time, as does your son. Try not to worry.

 

[Nienna]

Some kids are late bloomers, even without the problem of having fluid in the ears. My daughter, Emma, went through a stage where she threw fits all the time. I think it was out of frustration because I couldn't understand anything she was saying. She was about 18 months old, and I couldn't pick out ANY words. SHe would just release this stream of garbled nonsense. Shortly thereafter, I understood the word "purple." Turned out that she was trying to speak in entire sentences instead of one or two syllable words. She is actually gifted, knew her colors when she was about 18 months. But she had to backtrack to make herself understood; she had to slow down from trying to say entire sentences to speaking a word or two at a time.

My oint is the same as others'. Kids develop in their own time. Nathan is a special boy. It seems to me that he will probably be fine. And, even if he isn't "normal," he will still be a wonderful, lovable, unique person.

 

[Said1]

Yes, yes yes to what everyone said. Boys develop a little slower than girls in some areas too, speach being one of them.

Also, try not to get caught up in what he can't do, they do learn other things in the mean time, which may not be noticed.

 

[Mr. P]

Yes, yes yes ...

NOW yea got me EXCITED!

*Yeah I’m easy*

 

[fuzzykitten99]

I think I posted this before, but just in case...

I have a nephew who had ear infections almost continually for the first two years of his life. He didn't really speak intelligibly at all or in any kind of sentences until he was four. He was finally potty trained at four as well.

Some of us thought he was autistic. For a few years after that, it was still very hard to understand him. That boy is now 14, speaks very well, excels in standardized testing, and is an honors student.

He just had to make up for lost time, as does your son. Try not to worry.

this makes me feel a bit better about the whole thing.

I expected them to say he needs the classes, which I am not all that upset about, but because he is behind in other areas, it makes me worry.

 

[Annie]

this makes me feel a bit better about the whole thing.

I expected them to say he needs the classes, which I am not all that upset about, but because he is behind in other areas, it makes me worry.

I'm with what everyone else too! I'm also with you if that was a pre-school screening and he scored like that. Bottom line, you'll be way ahead of the game, he can have two years of basically 'pre-kindergarten' and hopefully, (usually), be ahead of the other kindergarten kids in 2 years!

 

[fuzzykitten99]

I talked to Tim's aunt who is a spec ed teacher at an elementary school, and she says that Nathan is nearly identical in personality to Tim when he was that age. Tim also had ear issues, and didn't talk coherently til he was almost 4, because they didn't do tubes in ears as readily as they do now, so his ears had to 'mature' to drain, if they didn't, THEN they would have done tubes. He is also 40% deaf in his left ear because of ear infections that presented no symptoms, much like Nathan had. Hopefully, they didn't do permanent damage to Nathan, and he goes for his recheck at the ENT at the end of the month.

she says that from what she's seen, Nathan is very mechanically inclined and that she sees him sit and figure stuff out and take things apart, do basic shape puzzles, etc. He prefers to be active and just observe rather than be talkative, unless other kids are around, then he's gabby. He knows how to push a chair or whatever over to a counter or table and climb to get something he wants-to our frustration! We never do this or have ever done this. He likes to climb (thus his nickname 'little monkey') and run and be active, which is exactly how Tim was at that age. Tim even was held back and re-did the year of Kindergarten because there wasn't such thing as EI back then. I knew Tim had done kindergarten twice because he told me, but I had no idea it was related to his ears/hearing.

She tells me that she remembers more about this stuff than even Tim's mom, just because of what she does for a living. I am hoping she is right on this, and she told me if I have any questions I can call her at any time. She made me feel better too.

 

[Annie]

She made me feel better too.

to the aunt!

 

[Gunny]

this makes me feel a bit better about the whole thing.

I expected them to say he needs the classes, which I am not all that upset about, but because he is behind in other areas, it makes me worry.

Nothing to worry about. You are raising a child, not assembling an auto by the numbers. He will develop when HE is ready, not when some dink with a PHD decides he should.

I have one daughter who was out of diapers at 18 months, and one that was out of them at about 4 1/2 YEARS. You're putting a lot of pressure on yourself; which, you will inadvertently transfer to your child because your expectations are of HIM.

As someone mentioned, he's got some catching up to do and it isn't going to happen overnight.

Enjoy your child for who and what he is NOW because you will NEVER have these days back. This is one game where there are no "do-overs."