Have you been Married?... Divorced?... What's your History?

[mal]

Some of the stories in this thread are amazing.

I've been married for 12 years to my first and only wife. It stuns me to hear how people can abuse their spouses and loved ones. It is my job as a man to provide for and protect my wife and my family. A man who abuses his spouse is not a man. He's a low piece of shit.

As is a woman who abuses her husband. I've known abused husbands and while statistically they are in the minority, they suffer not only from the abuse but have few if any resources to turn to for help.

Know someone who is on Abusive Wife #2...

With the First one, he was Arrested while she was Kicking his Ass in the Front Yard...

She was a Big Woman and a Bar Brawler... Met her a Bar.

The New one is More Verbally...



peace...

 

[Emma]

Some of the stories in this thread are amazing.

I've been married for 12 years to my first and only wife. It stuns me to hear how people can abuse their spouses and loved ones. It is my job as a man to provide for and protect my wife and my family. A man who abuses his spouse is not a man. He's a low piece of shit.

As is a woman who abuses her husband. I've known abused husbands and while statistically they are in the minority, they suffer not only from the abuse but have few if any resources to turn to for help.

That's very true.

A friend of mine is a marriage counselor and she says the level of spousal by wives towards their husbands is much higher than people believe.

It's no doubt a cultural thing, the stigma of admitting a woman is beating them up. Then again, mental abuse is far worse than physical in most respects (IMO).

Not long ago, someone on another forum talked about his son who was being physically and emotionally abused by his wife. Like abused women, his self-esteem was non-existent and he felt trapped in his situation. What made it worse was that there was no place for him to go (and rescue his kids as well). What really surprised me was how men are derided for being an abused husband by people who would NEVER consider attacking a woman in such a way, oftentimes by supposed advocates of abused women. They seem to feel he *must* have done something to her to justify the abuse.

As a matter of fact, that book I mentioned above? The Gift of Fear? The author came from an incredibly abusive childhood, and it was his mom who abused his dad.

 

[Emma]

Some of the stories in this thread are amazing.

I've been married for 12 years to my first and only wife. It stuns me to hear how people can abuse their spouses and loved ones. It is my job as a man to provide for and protect my wife and my family. A man who abuses his spouse is not a man. He's a low piece of shit.

As is a woman who abuses her husband. I've known abused husbands and while statistically they are in the minority, they suffer not only from the abuse but have few if any resources to turn to for help.

Know someone who is on Abusive Wife #2...

With the First one, he was Arrested while she was Kicking his Ass in the Front Yard...

She was a Big Woman and a Bar Brawler... Met her a Bar.

The New one is More Verbally...



peace...

Not to downplay the seriousness of physical violence, verbal abuse leaves lasting scars.

 

[Soggy in NOLA]

Married twice... wife 1.. still best of friends. See each other several times a week, dinner, she fixed a great stuffed manicotti last week, fixed her lawnmower last week! She also watches my dog when I travel.

Wife two... an idiot. Avoid her like the plague.

 

[Emma]

I wish someone would fix my lawnmower...

 

[Soggy in NOLA]

Sorry.... I don't travel to fix lawnmowers.

Wife 1 is an incredible lady.... a little nuts, but incredible. I wish I had been more patient.

 

[PixieStix]

I wish someone would fix my lawnmower...

Hint, hint

I have learned to fix my own. It really isn't that hard.

Probably just needs a spark plug and a good cleaning

 

[Emma]

I wish someone would fix my lawnmower...

Hint, hint

I have learned to fix my own. It really isn't that hard.

Probably just needs a spark plug and a good cleaning

It's electric.

Last time I had someone fix my mower, they did --- and then stole it

 

[PixieStix]

Mal, you left out one thing in your poll

I have to wonder how many have been left widowed. I would think that maybe they would not how to answer the question posed

Are those people considered, single, married, or both?

Just a thought

 

[Toro]

I wish someone would fix my lawnmower...

Hint, hint

I have learned to fix my own. It really isn't that hard.

Probably just needs a spark plug and a good cleaning

Could you teach me?

 

[tigerbob]

My wife's best friend married my best friend in 1998. Just heard this afternoon they're splitting. So depressing. Poor kids.

 

[PixieStix]

I wish someone would fix my lawnmower...

Hint, hint

I have learned to fix my own. It really isn't that hard.

Probably just needs a spark plug and a good cleaning

It's electric.

Last time I had someone fix my mower, they did --- and then stole it

Oh geez, I am sorry, that is just kind of funny.

The same person that fixed it, also stole it?

 

[mal]

Mal, you left out one thing in your poll

I have to wonder how many have been left widowed. I would think that maybe they would not how to answer the question posed

Are those people considered, single, married, or both?

Just a thought

MAJOR Error on my Part...

Sorry about that to all of those who have Lost a Spouse.



peace...

 

[PixieStix]

I wish someone would fix my lawnmower...

Hint, hint

I have learned to fix my own. It really isn't that hard.

Probably just needs a spark plug and a good cleaning

Could you teach me?

Sure, take it apart, replacing old rusty parts, clean and put back together, and you are done

It may annoy the heck out of ya, like this video

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vWcIiZtvbug]YouTube - Lawn mower repair Flywheel key replacement[/ame]

 

[Emma]

Hint, hint

I have learned to fix my own. It really isn't that hard.

Probably just needs a spark plug and a good cleaning

It's electric.

Last time I had someone fix my mower, they did --- and then stole it

Oh geez, I am sorry, that is just kind of funny.

The same person that fixed it, also stole it?

I know. What's up with that?

 

[dilloduck]

I wish someone would fix my lawnmower...

Hint, hint

I have learned to fix my own. It really isn't that hard.

Probably just needs a spark plug and a good cleaning

It's electric.

Last time I had someone fix my mower, they did --- and then stole it

Can't you just follow the cord ?

 

[Emma]

Hint, hint

I have learned to fix my own. It really isn't that hard.

Probably just needs a spark plug and a good cleaning

It's electric.

Last time I had someone fix my mower, they did --- and then stole it

Can't you just follow the cord ?

 

[Neser Boha]

Some great stories here ... I read every single one of them and I give kudos to everyone! May you all experience only the best from now on ...

I have to fess up that I actually was married once even though I chose 'never married' in the poll.

The reason I did that was because I was married only for about a year and a month and it was never a 'real' marriage anyway ...

He offered to marry me within the first two months of our relationship because at the time I had only two choices - either soon move out of the US, or get married to get the green card. At first I didn't want to do it, but as the months went by, I had to make the decision - move back to the Czech Republic where I haven't been in 6 years or marry my boyfriend who I was infatuated with.

So we got married and a short while later I realized that the emotional/anger issues that i'd known of for most of our relationship, which I thought we were more or less under control, were much worse than I ever imagined. He turned into a dish breaking, door slamming, screaming maniac that would yell at me for no and any reason at all. He started behaving like a little child ... he would even yell at me and call me names for 'studying too hard' for my final exams at the uni, or for being sick or tired. Simply every time he wasn't the center of my attention, he'd flip the fuck out. He started calling me names... It was getting worse and worse as the time passed.

So it happened that I basically gave up and moved out to live with a friend of mine. He started calling me all the time, begging me to come back home, promising me that he'd get into therapy and turn into a great husband. After a while he persuaded me.

I moved back and worked on our relationship - made us go to buddhist meditation sessions (to which I had to literally drag him), bought him self-help books that I actually read in full and he hardly even looked at, even tried to assist him with getting a therapist. So many promises later, so much effort on my side ... and just a little while after I came back to him ... it came all back and this time it was categorically worse. Then, one night, in the heat of the battle he shoved me. Wrong move on his side. I was outta door right after I collected all my necessities and drove back to my friend's house. That was the end of it.

I met him about 8 months later to sign the divorce papers. He was very apologetic and even self-flagellating ... He even told me he was in therapy and that it was working wonders ... It took him to almost hit me, me leaving him with a huge rent to pay, etc. for him to finally face it all and deal with it. I'm happy for him, I just wish it didn't have to be so painful for me. I'm still ecstatic I got out of the relationship when I did. Last time I heard from him was about 8 months ago when I turned down his facebook friend request.

Now I have a boyfriend of two years. An amazing person. Sometimes I can't believe he is real ... I have to touch him from time to time to make sure I've never been cared for, loved, and treated with such deep respect and such tenderness by a boyfriend before. I'm absolutely in love with him. He is the future father of my children and my future first REAL husband.

Mal, I apologize for lying in your poll, I hope I can be forgiven.

 

[mal]

Mal, I apologize for lying in your poll, I hope I can be forgiven.

I've had a Massive Internet Crush on you since we Started Battling way back...

It's no thing, Chicky...

And Thanks for Sharing your Story and Good Luck in your Current Relationship!

*HUGS*



peace...

 

[JakeStarkey]

Neser Boha, I am so sorry you were so hurt, and I am so glad that you have found true love.

Someone I know was talking about the 'finality' of the death of a loved one: that once gone is always gone.

Time is too short for all of us to be mucking around at all, you know?

May you always live happily ever after.