Forgiveness I just can't let this one go

[R.D.]

Does she want your forgiveness?

 

[RandomVariable]

Follow your heart tinydancer.

That has worked oh so well for her in the past.

 

[sealybobo]

I have been betrayed by husbands. Only two no big smurf. Thirds a winner. CHECK. I have been whacked at by my mother as my dad was dying .CHECK. I'm good to go in so many ways.

But I just can't let go that a person that I believed to be the best of friends stole from me.

I had a collection that most wouldn't think twice about but I had Hopi and Zuni pieces that were to die for. What makes them so special was as I worked at a place called the Beaverhead and yes it's another Sophia moment old men brought me what I would like to call art in silver. The jewellry was art beyond. Especially the Zuni.

So my friend ripped me off. I still to this day cannot forgive. How do you get past this? How does one?

Think about the person who didn't pay their home owners insurance and lost everything. Eventually they have to let it go and buy a new home and start all over. Next time they will know better and so will you. Move on. Get over it. It happened.

Just accept it that she's not your friend and not a good person. You don't still hang out with her do you? If so, did she pay you back or is she going to pay you back? Maybe if she was on drugs and cleaned up I would forgive her but I would NEVER let her back in the circle of trust.

You need to be a better judge of character and more careful in the future. Don't trust everyone. I have some friends I KNOW would not rip me off. But even still I wouldn't leave my pot out for them to pinch some.

I had a guy ask me if he could borrow $20 till Sunday. I said "sorry, no loanzies" then later explained to him if I don't know where he lives then I don't loan money because then if they don't pay I don't know where to come collect.

 

[sealybobo]

Revenge is best served cold

Lure them to Alaska.....

Kick their ass

Then kick their ass!

Afterward, join in with the cosmic creaminess...


In all seriousness. Does the person you cannot forgive even know or care that this is eating you up?

Because it sure sounds like this is harming you much more than it is them.

The answer to that should be the guiding reference to your action regarding this.

My aunt stole my grandmothers $. Probably $30k that would have gone to my dad. He keeps saying over and over and over, "It's not the $, it's the why?" And I can tell the "why" is eating him up. Get over it!

 

[Mojo2]

Follow your heart tinydancer.

That has worked oh so well for her in the past.

The benefit from following your own heart means to rely on one's own thoughts and feelings so that one will learn from those results which come from using one's own decision making processes, in effect learning to better one's own judgment so that it will become more reliable.

If you take other people's advice too much you only retard your own progress as a person.

 

[MeBelle]

Excellent thread!

 

[Dot Com]

that stuff belonged to the Great Spirit anyway (I have native American friends over the years) I wouldn't fret one iota over it tinyd. This is coming from someone who has had some very princely sums stolen from him over the years. They have to live with it daily & be judged in the final reckoning by Mother Earth.

 

[The Irish Ram]

Tinydancer, sometimes letting go is harder than it sounds. The whole situation is over except for your feelings. Those objects are in your past now. No amount of dwelling on what happened will change that. But what Satan can do with the situation is rob you of your joy.
Whatever time you spend on the past event robs you of present joy. So do not accommodate it. The very second it enters your mind, say, "Nope." And immediately send it out of your head and replace it with something you need to do, or someone you need to call, a funny video you saw...
You may have to do that for awhile but the less time you spend on something you can't change the happier you'll be concentrating on the things that make you happy.
Don't give it one second more of your happiness.

 

[bigrebnc1775]

Revenge is best served cold

Lure them to Alaska.....

Kick their ass

Then kick their ass!

Afterward, join in with the cosmic creaminess...


In all seriousness. Does the person you cannot forgive even know or care that this is eating you up?

Because it sure sounds like this is harming you much more than it is them.

The answer to that should be the guiding reference to your action regarding this.

Well leaving them face down in a puddle of their own blood in need of facial reconstruction will make me feel better.

 

[Skull Pilot]

I have been betrayed by husbands. Only two no big smurf. Thirds a winner. CHECK. I have been whacked at by my mother as my dad was dying .CHECK. I'm good to go in so many ways.

But I just can't let go that a person that I believed to be the best of friends stole from me.

I had a collection that most wouldn't think twice about but I had Hopi and Zuni pieces that were to die for. What makes them so special was as I worked at a place called the Beaverhead and yes it's another Sophia moment old men brought me what I would like to call art in silver. The jewellry was art beyond. Especially the Zuni.

So my friend ripped me off. I still to this day cannot forgive. How do you get past this? How does one?

Who says you have to forgive anyone?

I do not forgive a betrayal what i do is forget.

I will forget you ever existed.

 

[RandomVariable]

Follow your heart tinydancer.

That has worked oh so well for her in the past.

The benefit from following your own heart means to rely on one's own thoughts and feelings so that one will learn from those results which come from using one's own decision making processes, in effect learning to better one's own judgment so that it will become more reliable.

If you take other people's advice too much you only retard your own progress as a person.

Fair enough. I phrase crossed my mind while out just now. "One must learn where their pain comes from before they can decide where to put their love." OK, it is a work in progress but I think it has merit.

 

[Avatar4321]

I have been betrayed by husbands. Only two no big smurf. Thirds a winner. CHECK. I have been whacked at by my mother as my dad was dying .CHECK. I'm good to go in so many ways.

But I just can't let go that a person that I believed to be the best of friends stole from me.

I had a collection that most wouldn't think twice about but I had Hopi and Zuni pieces that were to die for. What makes them so special was as I worked at a place called the Beaverhead and yes it's another Sophia moment old men brought me what I would like to call art in silver. The jewellry was art beyond. Especially the Zuni.

So my friend ripped me off. I still to this day cannot forgive. How do you get past this? How does one?

Who says you have to forgive anyone?

.

God

 

[ninja007]

don't forgive them then Hold onto it- its good for you....

 

[sameech]

So my friend ripped me off. I still to this day cannot forgive. How do you get past this? How does one?

You won't get over what your friend did. If these were things you valued, then acquire similar things you like so you do not feel like something is missing from your life on a day to day basis. Maybe that will help. People are flawed, even you and me and everybody else. Use it as a reminder for you to be a better person too.

 

[ninja007]

I say don't forgive them.

Btw- if you do not forgive them. God won't forgive you.

 

[ninja007]

eta- the basics of all this is you are putting material possessions above your rel. with God (Idolatry)

 

[dblack]

 

[sealybobo]

I say don't forgive them.

Btw- if you do not forgive them. God won't forgive you.

:Let me get this straight. So everyone walking around who has someone in their life that they don't like and they never want to see them again and they hate that person and would even if they saw them in 80 years from now, even if they have been baptized and they are Christians, if they have someone out there who they never forgave, god isn't going to "forgive" them and they will burn in hell for eternity?

I think some people need to forgive but I don't. If you hurt my family, I will maybe be able to move on and forget someday, but I don't think I would or could honestly say I forgive you. If you hurt my family and on purpose, I would never have any remorse for you or petty and if I could I would pay you back 10 fold.

Maybe I would say it so I could move on with my life and I get why people forgive, but honestly, give me 5 minutes with that person and....

 

[sealybobo]

I have been betrayed by husbands. Only two no big smurf. Thirds a winner. CHECK. I have been whacked at by my mother as my dad was dying .CHECK. I'm good to go in so many ways.

But I just can't let go that a person that I believed to be the best of friends stole from me.

I had a collection that most wouldn't think twice about but I had Hopi and Zuni pieces that were to die for. What makes them so special was as I worked at a place called the Beaverhead and yes it's another Sophia moment old men brought me what I would like to call art in silver. The jewellry was art beyond. Especially the Zuni.

So my friend ripped me off. I still to this day cannot forgive. How do you get past this? How does one?

How come no replies. Did you like any of our advice?

 

[Manonthestreet]

Do they even want your forgiveness? If not problem solved.