- Sep 22, 2013
- 4,956
- 250
- 85
This is a capitalism-toast inspired by Alien: Covenant (my final homage to my favorite Ridley Scott film).
It's also a nice praise for the new gender-intrigue character Daniels (portrayed perfectly by Katherine Waterston).
Anyone remember fondly the modernism-mercantile intrigue stirred by the American gem the Commodore 64?
Now, it's all capitalism-fury Xenomorph video-games on the Xbox.
Signing off (thanks for everything USMB),
====
Aboard the USS Covenant, a mighty crew of human space-explorers including Daniels prepared to engage with a mysterious alien species called 'Xenomorphs.' Daniels was portrayed by Katherine Waterston in this exciting new Ridley Scott sci-fi modernism-paranoia horror-film simply titled Alien: Covenant.
As the crew of the Covenant discovered that members were infected by a strange symbiotic substance on the alien-planet they were exploring, they began evaluating their chances for survival. The substance was mutating the infected humans and causing large Xenomorphs to burst out of their bodies which the creatures were using for primal gestation. Ridley Scott suggested it was his best sci-fi horror film.
Daniels (Waterston) was the new Ellen Ripley (Sigourney Weaver) in this Weyland Industries space-horror opera prequel to the Alien franchise. Daniels was responsible for keeping cool and maintaining some form of objective composure so the humans stood some chance against the wicked Xenomorphs.
Entertainment magazines and critics called Waterston's Daniels the new Ripley (Weaver), and Ridley Scott's film was being hailed as the finest film in the Alien franchise to date (which included more than 5 high-profile films including Alien: Resurrection starring Winona Ryder). Daniels was friends with the Covenant's on-board android-human "Walter One," who was about to be betrayed by his twin-brother robot "David 8." Daniels was the sisterly-figure, trying to be a human friend to Walter One in this modernism treatise on the angst associated with human progress...
The Xenomorph alien-creature in this Ridley Scott film was truly terrifying and agile and represented a cross between a giant ant some kind of evil black dragon. The Xenomorph was a beast of an alien, and Daniels was supposed to deal with it using a tether-rope and a machine-gun as her space-comrade Tennessee struggled to steer the escape-vehicle on his own. The Xenomorph in this film represented some of the best design-work in sci-fi horror to date(!).
As Waterston exhibited the nice range of her performance/acting abilities, audiences were thrilled as the valiant Daniels tried to spray the evil and ugly Xenomorph with her handy-dandy machine-gun. Daniels was a true 'champion of women in space' and Waterson was perfect for this new age sci-fi horror movie-marketing 'program.'
American movie superstar Tom Cruise (star of the Mission: Impossible American spy-film franchise, rival to the James Bond British spy-film franchise!) loved Alien: Covenant and noted how Waterston's Daniels represented some of the best on-screen female action-adventure acrobatics in horror-oriented storytelling in recent times (including Natasha Henstridge's awesome performance as a virulent female-alien hybrid in the sexy sci-fi horror gem Species). Cruise wanted to meet Waterston to ask her about Daniels and compare her to his own spy-action character Ethan Hunt (Mission: Impossible).
American movie-star Kurt Russell (star of The Thing and Captain Ron) also liked Waterston's Daniels and wanted to see more gutsy female actresses in exciting modernism films, so he rented Aeon Flux (Charlize Theron), Species (Natasha Henstridge), and The Terminator (Linda Hamilton). Russell concluded that Waterston's Alien: Covenant was superior in its treatment of very real and very unnerving modern-era fears and nightmares.
A couple of Texan psychos (serial-killers) also saw Alien: Covenant and decided they wanted to go on a killing spree, targeting female cops and using the murders to spread lies in the press about America's obsession with media idols and false-prophets. These two psychos saw nothing redeeming in sci-fi storytelling for modern-era problems such as eco-pollution, so they wanted to eventually start stalking Katherine Waterston!
Americans love movies and appreciate protecting their talents/stars, so Waterston got great security and bodyguards, so no fanatic would bother her about why she made such a gender-mighty sci-fi horror-film and that too with a very respected/esteemed science-fiction film-maker (Ridley Scott!). Waterston was excited to safely give liberal interviews about why her work on Alien: Covenant could potentially be important/symbolic for women in modern movies. Waterston intended to use the 'box-office revenue' angle to hype women in the arts, and capitalism would be on her side (Scott's film was a success!). Waterson wanted to talk to U.S. First Lady Melania Trump about her new movie too.
American paramilitary crusaders known as 'G.I. Joes' were busy dealing with a very eerie NASA signal received from an uncategorized alien-intelligence on Venus. The G.I. Joes prepared to board the advanced new space-vessel the USS Charter, and their goal was to determine if the alien-species was hostile or friendly. The G.I. Joes had no idea that the aliens on Venus resembled the Xenomorphs from Alien: Covenant. Was Ridley Scott a visionary or merely a 'butler' of capitalism and cinema?
Americans love computers (Commodore 64, Apple, IBM, Microsoft, Dell) and wanted to use the fanfare associated with Alien: Covenant to post stickers and images of great characters and superhumans (from various genres including comic books!) dealing with monsters of a very modern proportion (i.e., Xenomorphs). Xenomorph-intrigue themed blogs became very very popular the summer Scott's film was released, and the G.I. Joes wondered if they should take a copy of the film as a diplomatic package to Venus(!).
American intelligence had secured a special decoy-president to serve as world leader should Donald Trump be killed by terrorists during this very challenging and commerce (and hence capitalism) centric presidential administration. The decoy's name was Bruno Bishop, a man of Irish descent, and he would secure operations between America and the World Bank should anything bizarre happen like President Trump being kidnapped by Xenomorphs! Capitalism remained high priority #1.
GOD: Waterston's Daniels was very cool...
SATAN: Sci-fi horror is very chic now!
GOD: Women in cinema are symbolic.
SATAN: The age of media/celebrity is the time of magazines.
GOD: Magazines promote etiquette.
SATAN: They also promote glamour.
GOD: I wonder what archaeologists in the future will make of Alien: Covenant.
SATAN: They'll say, "Daniels was Supergirl!"
GOD: Was she? The Xenomorphs symbolize capitalism-fury, right?
SATAN: Of course. They're totems of modern rage/ambition (and superstition!).
====
It's also a nice praise for the new gender-intrigue character Daniels (portrayed perfectly by Katherine Waterston).
Anyone remember fondly the modernism-mercantile intrigue stirred by the American gem the Commodore 64?
Now, it's all capitalism-fury Xenomorph video-games on the Xbox.
Signing off (thanks for everything USMB),
====
Aboard the USS Covenant, a mighty crew of human space-explorers including Daniels prepared to engage with a mysterious alien species called 'Xenomorphs.' Daniels was portrayed by Katherine Waterston in this exciting new Ridley Scott sci-fi modernism-paranoia horror-film simply titled Alien: Covenant.
As the crew of the Covenant discovered that members were infected by a strange symbiotic substance on the alien-planet they were exploring, they began evaluating their chances for survival. The substance was mutating the infected humans and causing large Xenomorphs to burst out of their bodies which the creatures were using for primal gestation. Ridley Scott suggested it was his best sci-fi horror film.
Daniels (Waterston) was the new Ellen Ripley (Sigourney Weaver) in this Weyland Industries space-horror opera prequel to the Alien franchise. Daniels was responsible for keeping cool and maintaining some form of objective composure so the humans stood some chance against the wicked Xenomorphs.
Entertainment magazines and critics called Waterston's Daniels the new Ripley (Weaver), and Ridley Scott's film was being hailed as the finest film in the Alien franchise to date (which included more than 5 high-profile films including Alien: Resurrection starring Winona Ryder). Daniels was friends with the Covenant's on-board android-human "Walter One," who was about to be betrayed by his twin-brother robot "David 8." Daniels was the sisterly-figure, trying to be a human friend to Walter One in this modernism treatise on the angst associated with human progress...
The Xenomorph alien-creature in this Ridley Scott film was truly terrifying and agile and represented a cross between a giant ant some kind of evil black dragon. The Xenomorph was a beast of an alien, and Daniels was supposed to deal with it using a tether-rope and a machine-gun as her space-comrade Tennessee struggled to steer the escape-vehicle on his own. The Xenomorph in this film represented some of the best design-work in sci-fi horror to date(!).
As Waterston exhibited the nice range of her performance/acting abilities, audiences were thrilled as the valiant Daniels tried to spray the evil and ugly Xenomorph with her handy-dandy machine-gun. Daniels was a true 'champion of women in space' and Waterson was perfect for this new age sci-fi horror movie-marketing 'program.'
American movie superstar Tom Cruise (star of the Mission: Impossible American spy-film franchise, rival to the James Bond British spy-film franchise!) loved Alien: Covenant and noted how Waterston's Daniels represented some of the best on-screen female action-adventure acrobatics in horror-oriented storytelling in recent times (including Natasha Henstridge's awesome performance as a virulent female-alien hybrid in the sexy sci-fi horror gem Species). Cruise wanted to meet Waterston to ask her about Daniels and compare her to his own spy-action character Ethan Hunt (Mission: Impossible).
American movie-star Kurt Russell (star of The Thing and Captain Ron) also liked Waterston's Daniels and wanted to see more gutsy female actresses in exciting modernism films, so he rented Aeon Flux (Charlize Theron), Species (Natasha Henstridge), and The Terminator (Linda Hamilton). Russell concluded that Waterston's Alien: Covenant was superior in its treatment of very real and very unnerving modern-era fears and nightmares.
A couple of Texan psychos (serial-killers) also saw Alien: Covenant and decided they wanted to go on a killing spree, targeting female cops and using the murders to spread lies in the press about America's obsession with media idols and false-prophets. These two psychos saw nothing redeeming in sci-fi storytelling for modern-era problems such as eco-pollution, so they wanted to eventually start stalking Katherine Waterston!
Americans love movies and appreciate protecting their talents/stars, so Waterston got great security and bodyguards, so no fanatic would bother her about why she made such a gender-mighty sci-fi horror-film and that too with a very respected/esteemed science-fiction film-maker (Ridley Scott!). Waterston was excited to safely give liberal interviews about why her work on Alien: Covenant could potentially be important/symbolic for women in modern movies. Waterston intended to use the 'box-office revenue' angle to hype women in the arts, and capitalism would be on her side (Scott's film was a success!). Waterson wanted to talk to U.S. First Lady Melania Trump about her new movie too.
American paramilitary crusaders known as 'G.I. Joes' were busy dealing with a very eerie NASA signal received from an uncategorized alien-intelligence on Venus. The G.I. Joes prepared to board the advanced new space-vessel the USS Charter, and their goal was to determine if the alien-species was hostile or friendly. The G.I. Joes had no idea that the aliens on Venus resembled the Xenomorphs from Alien: Covenant. Was Ridley Scott a visionary or merely a 'butler' of capitalism and cinema?
Americans love computers (Commodore 64, Apple, IBM, Microsoft, Dell) and wanted to use the fanfare associated with Alien: Covenant to post stickers and images of great characters and superhumans (from various genres including comic books!) dealing with monsters of a very modern proportion (i.e., Xenomorphs). Xenomorph-intrigue themed blogs became very very popular the summer Scott's film was released, and the G.I. Joes wondered if they should take a copy of the film as a diplomatic package to Venus(!).
American intelligence had secured a special decoy-president to serve as world leader should Donald Trump be killed by terrorists during this very challenging and commerce (and hence capitalism) centric presidential administration. The decoy's name was Bruno Bishop, a man of Irish descent, and he would secure operations between America and the World Bank should anything bizarre happen like President Trump being kidnapped by Xenomorphs! Capitalism remained high priority #1.
GOD: Waterston's Daniels was very cool...
SATAN: Sci-fi horror is very chic now!
GOD: Women in cinema are symbolic.
SATAN: The age of media/celebrity is the time of magazines.
GOD: Magazines promote etiquette.
SATAN: They also promote glamour.
GOD: I wonder what archaeologists in the future will make of Alien: Covenant.
SATAN: They'll say, "Daniels was Supergirl!"
GOD: Was she? The Xenomorphs symbolize capitalism-fury, right?
SATAN: Of course. They're totems of modern rage/ambition (and superstition!).
====
