The Great Tribulation: Capitalism Exam/Tale

Abishai100

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Sep 22, 2013
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This is a Heaven-War parable about capitalism-theory inspired by Judge Dredd.

Signing off (time to BBQ),



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"Adam and Eve were favoured by God to evaluate the role of capitalism in geopolitical peace and God was happy with how the Trump Administration saw the peace-promotional alliance between South Korea and North Korea during the symbolic Winter Olympics in PyeongChang. God selected a special man and woman to serve as 'diplomats' for an iconic debate about the redeemability of capitalism theory. God recruited Kitana (a jewelled female gypsy and incredible warrior) and Racer-X (a self-proclaimed car-racer and American 'vigilante'). God wanted Kitana and Racer-X to go through the challenging gauntlet of capitalism arguments/debates --- with Satan (the adversary of civilization!). Would capitalism win the day?"

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"God wanted to be by Kitana and Racer-X's side, and since Racer-X loved American comic books, God took the form of the elfin jet-glider soaring Marvel Comics American 'super-villain' Green Goblin (Norman Osborn), an emotionally troubled 'mad scientist.' Racer-X knew that God was guiding him, since Green Goblin appeared as both a 'messenger' and a creative genius. Racer-X knew he and his girlfriend Kitana could handsomely move through this 'capitalism moral-test/gauntlet.' However, Racer-X didn't realize that Satan could take on unnerving forms and so could Satan's minions. Capitalism would be put to the test."

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"As Racer-X and Kitana prepared to go through the gauntlet, Satan arrayed his forces. He took the form of a commandeering purple robot named Galvatron and his minions took the forms/shapes of allied evil knights, robots named Cyclonus and Scourge. Galvatron, Cyclonus, and Scourge represented all the Machiavellian rage associated with anti-capitalism sentiments and terrorism itself."

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"God knew Racer-X and Kitana would need help, so he sent one of his strongest angels, Gabriel, to help Racer-X and Kitana and provide them with moral courage. After all, Gabriel was the perfect symbol of humble valiant deeds, and he took the form of the mighty DC Comics spiritually-tested 'super-brute' named Bane, and Racer-X was relieved Gabriel appeared as a 'friend'."

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"The debate began, and the angels of heaven watched...Satan brought with him the mysterious and dangerous Whore of Babylon, but God sent his beautiful female angel Adia...

RACER-X: Capitalism is a game-arena requiring teamwork.
CYCLONUS: Capitalism is competitive and creates urges to betray!

KITANA: It's easy to destroy; it's more challenging to praise.
GALVATRON: What's so praiseworthy about Wall Street?

RACER-X: I'm a fan of sci-fi storytelling, not fantasy-indulgences.
SCOURGE: I can concede that capitalism is a structural theory.

KITANA: This all seems a bit cynical, no?
WHORE OF BABYLON: Capitalism is always likened to piracy!

RACER-X: Have you ever tried defending merchants?
CYCLONUS: I have no concern for the tediousness of the marketplace...

KITANA: I refuse to believe capitalism is fragile, simply because gambling is fun.
CYCLONUS: You should speak with a spiritually weary stockbroker...

RACER-X: I like how Donald Trump balances diplomacy with commercial bravado.
GALVATRON: He's a pawn, but perhaps he'll do good for a consumerism-minded world!

KITANA: I read the Bible, honor my colors and blades, and praise the value of eBay.
WHORE OF BABYLON: You're simply 'idealistic' about artisans, my dear.

GABRIEL: The debate is over. Capitalism is measured to be logistically intellectual..."


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"God knew that Racer-X and Kitana would not be able to withstand the deadly temptations of Satan and his allies including the mysterious and seductive Whore of Babylon, so God requested that Satan/Galvatron leave Racer-X and Kitana and allow the two lovers to return to Earth and to continue their 'optimistic' missions to defend democracy, capitalism, and 'TrumpUSA'. Satan/Galvatron conceded and suggested to God that humanity be encouraged to indulge their 'anti-social fantasies' with the new modernism-dread oriented sci-fi horror film Alien: Covenant."

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"American celebrities Tom Hanks and Tom Cruise were approached by God to evaluate how modern media and culture could be oriented to better incorporate the activities of consumerism-minded optimistic Christmas shoppers, so Hanks and Cruise considered making movies that featured scenes about the holiday season (Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter, etc.). God was pleased and knew that Racer-X and Kitana would be cared for in this new 'pro-capitalism system' otherwise known as 'TrumpUSA'. Gabriel also returned to heaven, confident that Adam and Eve would find their 'way' in this modern 'fog' of commercial angst (e.g., Enron, Napster, Microsoft, Gulf War, etc., etc.). Hanks and Cruise decided to watch Alien: Covenant together (since the two movie superstars were buddies). Satan/Galvatron smiled, knowing that capitalism would continue to require much study!"

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GOD: It looks like Adam and Eve have passed the test...
SATAN: We'll see if humans can avoid the temptation of indulgences.
GOD: I know Facebook has become a 'guilty-pleasure' but consumerism can be peaceful!
SATAN: That's true, but I will continue to worry about the 'scope' of Wall Street...
GOD: Alright, and I'll follow the spiritual development of Racer-X and Kitana.
SATAN: It was a Great Tribulation.
GOD: It sure was; I think TrumpUSA will endure this 'political infancy period.'
SATAN: I wonder what America would be right now had Hillary Clinton been President!
GOD: America may not have been 'ready' for a female-president...
SATAN: That's objective thinking; I suppose I'll go watch Alien: Covenant too (on Netflix!).
GOD: Netflix is so darn convenient.
SATAN: We should teach a course at Yale University about capitalism game-theory.
GOD: I'd rather read a good Wall Street ghost-story at Barnes & Noble.
SATAN: To the bookstore...

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:dance:

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American Ads


This is a toys-based presentation about consumerism-ethos.

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As consumers purchased vintage consumerism-relics on eBay such as the classic 1980s transparent neon home-phone (with musical tones!), market trends changed in a general TrumpUSA consumerism-optimism 'wave.' Suddenly toys about toys were the toys to get for your kids and youngsters and family. Even adults were trying-out video-games.

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American serial-killer Michael Myers was stalking American teenagers on Halloween Eve wearing a white-mask and carrying symbolic toy water-pistols (transparent-plastic!) for his special community festivity omen regarding the coming End of Days and the arrival of the Whore of Babylon on Earth to see the upheaval of male societies (e.g., Facebook-clubs). Myers didn't know what to do...

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Arnold Schwarzenegger got a wood lawn chair and arranged a flower-garden display to sit by on the White House lawn one June afternoon. It was amazing. Arnold was campaigning for the legalization of marijuana. He was tired of hearing about why the soothing drug was only legal for medical purposes; he simply wanted more legal rights for glaucoma-patients who took it as a prescription-medicine and muscle-relaxant(!). Arnold was a passionate 'modernism politician.' Would Michael Myers consider him redeemed?

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American folk-pop soul singer Nicoletta Larson was seen as a ghost at a random library in the Ivy League by a medical student studying late one Friday nights about the biochemistry of homeopathics. Larson wanted to tell the idealistic young med-student about the values of labor in a modernized world of convenience-based etiquette/customs (e.g., Facebook, eBay, Wal-Mart, etc.). When the med-student realized he was conversing with a ghost, he got scared and ran away. However, he remembered what Larson's ghost told him about commercial labor.

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American comic book characters/stories about colourful 'superheroes' battling/fighting with eccentric 'super--villains.' The heroes (e.g., Aquaman, Wonder Woman, Green Lantern, Superman) and the villains (e.g., Lex Luthor, Riddler, Bane, Poison Ivy, Ursa, Toyman, Captain Cold) were arrayed as modernism civics-optimism 'totem-avatar' organizations/clubs (e.g., The A-Team, The Dirty Dozen, Army of Darkness). This was highlighted in the Challenge of the Super-Friends vs. The Legion of Doom animated series and spin-off comics by D.C. Was this representative of a curiosity about the teamwork of democracy in the modern world?

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American imagineers made cartoons and specials about fabled lands, archaic gods, and fantastic harmless creatures for youngsters interested in an emerging 'mobile pocket e-jewelbox' aesthetic (i.e., Nickelodeon TV). So where was leviathan, the prophesied giant sea-beast of pure hellish (and squeamish) dissatisfaction! Leviathan wanted to defy the human spirit's endless fascination with beauty-based marketing (e.g., MTV, Gap, J.Crew, The Bold & The Beautiful, The Young and the Restless, Apple-iPhone, etc.).

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GOD: I'm a fan of Nicoletta Larson...
SATAN: Are you a fan of Napster?
GOD: I prefer iTunes!
SATAN: iTunes is well-organized(!).
GOD: Do you like Nickelodeon.com?
SATAN: Of course! Who doesn't?
GOD: I like The Smurfs.
SATAN: Entertainment is mindless...
GOD: It's soothing after hard work.
SATAN: Do you like Ridley Scott's Gladiator?
GOD: I prefer Ridley Scott's Alien: Covenant.
SATAN: Will you be shopping on Black Friday?
GOD: No; I'll be mourning the murder of 300 Sufi Muslims in an Egypt-mosque last year.
SATAN: That's heavy; I suppose you'll be watching some anniversary-special on Al Jazeera!
GOD: I prefer BBC to the CNN in terms of news-based 'society/civilization communiques.'
SATAN: You prefer that British-classic pro-institutional approach to traffic-journalism?
GOD: Yes I do; I also would like to teach a Comp-Lit course at Yale about Robert Ludlum.
SATAN: Modernization comes with toys (IBM) as well as terrorism (Internet-hackers).

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:dance:

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