Charlize * Eagle (Dianetics)

Abishai100

VIP Member
Sep 22, 2013
4,956
250
85
This is a sports-media parody inspired by The Waterboy.

Cheers,


====

Americans love football, horror-films, candy, and comic books. Super Bowl 52 (NFL) has everyone talking about the Goliath-like New England Patriots (led by titan-QB Tom Brady) and if anyone can stop them from winning their record 6th Vince Lombardi trophy. The quirky underdog NFC team Philadelphia Eagles (led unfortunately by a backup QB named Nick Foles) are being quietly discussed as an 'underdog team' by a few sports-writers. Why? The Eagles have reached their 6th(!) NFC Championship game since 2000. The last time the Eagles actually won the NFC Championship game, however, to advance to the Super Bowl (39) was in 2004 when they lost to, you guessed it, Brady's Patriots(!).

So what's the big deal? I'll tell you what's the big deal. American celebrities are suddenly eco-conscious activists (e.g., the Leonardo DiCaprio Foundation). I see Hollywood actresses such as Charlize Theron (star of Monster) talking about how the Philadelphia Eagles represent new age eco-consciousness (since the team dons the 'eco-friendly' American Bald Eagle --- a species eco-conservationists care much about!). So do these celebrities really care if the Philadelphia Eagles can upset the New England Patriots in Super Bowl 52? It's a consideration weighty enough to motivate people to ask questions such as, "What's not patriotic about the American Bald Eagle, man?" Maybe the Eagles can pull off arguably the upset of the New Millennium.

So Charlize is sitting in her studio and making computer-image collages of the American Bald Eagle sitting next to the Marvel Comics super-villain Carnage (real name: Cletus Kasady), a psycho-turned-monster. Charlize wants to convey the message that not cheering for the Philadelphia Eagles just might endanger the American Bald Eagle in a way that would 'metaphysically invoke' the demonic underworld spirit of Carnage (Cletus Kasady). Actually, Charlize is upset she wasn't cast in the film American Psycho (Christian Bale) and wants to use Carnage to make a troubling social statement about 'progressive politics.' I see Charlize's Internet-blog, and don't you know it(?), I realize that I've started to cheer for the Eagles --- because Carnage (Cletus Kasady) is simply...a spooky sell! That's TrumpUSA, baby!

====


comicsa.jpg
 

Forum List

Back
Top