or king, as it were. Tonight my wife and I will leave our kids at -Cp's house, travel to the airport, hop a plane and fly to North Carolina. We'll rent a car, and drive to Myrtle Beach, SC for the weekend. I'm not scared to fly. I'm scared of a catestrophic death. I'm sitting at my puter listening to PM Dawn (the group...remember them? ) and I'm fighting the urges to create entire fictional situations. I'm fighting the urge to imagine my kids growing up with me or their momma. I'm struggling to keep my thoughts from "I wonder if -Cp will be as good of a Daddy to my little girl?" "What if she needs me some day?" "Will I be in Heaven watching from above as she cries in her room? At our funeral?" I'm a drama queen...yeah. Sometimes, when a particularly GOOD country-song comes on the radio while I'm driving, I will bust out in tears. Butterfly Kisses. Yup. She Thinks She Needs Me? For sure. I Believe? Hell yeah. I Miss My Friend? Boo-hoo'in like a little biotch. So - I'm going to get off the computer, start packing...making arrangements, etc. In the back of my mind I'll walk thru my day wondering if it's the last time my kids will see me. Mary asked me, last night, "I need you to be positive...I need to you 'know' everything will be alright (As much as she denies it, she's as much of a drama queen)." I'll soldier-on. That's what I do. I keep telling myself, if I want to worry - worry MORE about the ~200 mile drive from Raleigh/Durham airport to Myrtle Beach SC. Looking at data, we're closer to death in that Mazda6 or equivolent mid-sized rental sedan, than we are in a Boeing 757. So...That's it. Naturally, I'm sitting here typing this, crying like a big fat hairy baby. Hehe. (sigh).