A Modest Proposal For The Liberals...

Discussion in 'Politics' started by 007, Feb 14, 2009.

  1. 007
    Offline

    007 Charter Member Supporting Member

    Joined:
    May 8, 2004
    Messages:
    38,386
    Thanks Received:
    7,859
    Trophy Points:
    1,130
    Ratings:
    +11,912
    A Modest Proposal For The Liberals.


    Dear American liberals, leftists, social progressives, socialists, Marxists, et al: We have stuck together since the late 1950's, but the whole of this latest election process has made me realize that I want a divorce. I know we tolerated each other for many years for the sake of future generations, but sadly, this relationship has run its course.

    Our two ideological sides of America cannot, and will not ever agree on what is right, so let's just end it on friendly terms. We can smile, chalk it up to irreconcilable differences, and go our own way.

    Here is a model dissolution agreement: Our two groups can equitably divide up the country by landmass each taking a portion. That will be the difficult part, but I am sure our two sides can come to a friendly agreement. After that it should be relatively easy!
    Our respective representatives can effortlessly divide other assets since both sides have such distinct and disparate tastes. We don't like redistributive taxes so you can keep them.
    You are welcome to the liberal judges and the ACLU.

    Since you hate guns and war, we'll take our firearms, the cops, the NRA, and the military.

    You can keep Oprah, Michael Moore, and Rosie O'Donnell (You are, however, responsible for finding a bio-diesel vehicle big enough to move them).

    We'll keep the capitalism, greedy corporations, pharmaceutical companies, Wal-Mart, and Wall Street. You can have your beloved homeless, homeboys, hippies, and illegal aliens.

    We'll keep the hot Alaskan hockey moms, greedy CEO's, and rednecks.

    We'll keep the Bibles and give you NBC and Hollywood .

    You can make nice with Iran and Palestine and we'll retain the right to invade and hammer places that threaten us.

    You can have the peaceniks and war protesters. When our allies or way of life are under assault, we'll provide them job security. We'll keep our Judeo-Christian values. You are welcome to Islam, Scientology, Humanism, and Shirley McClain. You can also have the U.N. But we will no longer be paying the bill.

    We'll keep the SUVs, pickup trucks, and over sized luxury cars. You can take every Subaru station wagon you can find. You can give everyone health care, if you can find any practicing doctors. We'll continue to believe health care is a luxury and not a right. We'll keep The Battle Hymn of the Republic and the National Anthem. I'm sure you'll be happy to substitute Imagine, I'd Like to Teach the World to Sing, Kum Ba Ya, or We Are the World.

    We'll practice trickle down economics, and you can give trickle up poverty its best shot. Since it often so offends you we'll keep our history, our name, and our flag.

    Would you agree to this?

    P.S. Also, we'll throw in Barbra Streisand and Jane Fonda.
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 2
  2. Ravi
    Offline

    Ravi Diamond Member

    Joined:
    Feb 27, 2008
    Messages:
    81,328
    Thanks Received:
    12,693
    Trophy Points:
    2,205
    Location:
    Hating Hatters
    Ratings:
    +29,769
    If you're going to dabble in plagiarism you should at least find something intelligent to steal.
     
  3. 007
    Offline

    007 Charter Member Supporting Member

    Joined:
    May 8, 2004
    Messages:
    38,386
    Thanks Received:
    7,859
    Trophy Points:
    1,130
    Ratings:
    +11,912
    I can't plagerize an unsigned spam email Janie jingle tits. Either say something worth reading to me, or keep your pie hole shut.

    But just to add, true to form, you attack me instead of the content of the OP. Typical liberal trailer trash.
     
    Last edited: Feb 14, 2009
  4. Red Dawn
    Offline

    Red Dawn Senior Member

    Joined:
    Jul 19, 2008
    Messages:
    3,224
    Thanks Received:
    456
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Location:
    Liberal Socialist Paradise
    Ratings:
    +456
    its not an unsigned email.


    Its some internet drivel written by some dude named John Wall. You just modified the title, and took his name off.



    A Modest Proposal - Dear American liberals, leftists...
    Email | 12/24/08 | John J. Wall - Law Student - American

    Dear American liberals, leftists, social progressives, socialists, Marxists, Obama supporters, et al:

    We have stuck together since the late 1950's, but the whole of this latest election process has made me realize that I want a divorce. I know we tolerated each other for many years for the sake of future generations, but sadly, this relationship has run its course. Our two ideological sides of America cannot and will not ever agree on what is right, so let's just end it on friendly terms. We can smile, slate it up to irreconcilable differences, and go our own ways.

    Here is a model dissolution agreement:

    Our two groups can equitably divide up the country by landmass each taking a portion. That will be the difficult part, but I am sure our two sides can come to a friendly agreement. After that it should be relatively easy! Our respective representatives can effortlessly divide other assets since both sides have such distinct and disparate tastes. We don't like redistributive taxes so you can keep them. You are welcome to the liberal judges and the ACLU.............


    A Modest Proposal - Dear American liberals, leftists... - Topix
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 1
  5. Meister
    Offline

    Meister VIP Member Supporting Member

    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2009
    Messages:
    25,900
    Thanks Received:
    8,099
    Trophy Points:
    63
    Location:
    Conservative part of the Northwest
    Ratings:
    +8,100
    Oh brother, This is just like a divorce. It's going to get nasty. :razz:
     
  6. Shogun
    Offline

    Shogun Free: Mudholes Stomped

    Joined:
    Jan 8, 2007
    Messages:
    30,495
    Thanks Received:
    2,224
    Trophy Points:
    1,043
    Ratings:
    +2,260
    huh.. look at that.. a less than honest conservative.

    and, to answer your question, No. Try to succeed and watch how you get Jefferson Davis'd. We had to deal with your shit for 8 years now sit down and shit the fuck up for our 8.
     
  7. Meister
    Offline

    Meister VIP Member Supporting Member

    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2009
    Messages:
    25,900
    Thanks Received:
    8,099
    Trophy Points:
    63
    Location:
    Conservative part of the Northwest
    Ratings:
    +8,100
    At least we won't whine, cry, and lie like your side did for 8 years.
     
  8. Shogun
    Offline

    Shogun Free: Mudholes Stomped

    Joined:
    Jan 8, 2007
    Messages:
    30,495
    Thanks Received:
    2,224
    Trophy Points:
    1,043
    Ratings:
    +2,260
    uh, do you want to go splash some cold water on your face and come back to read what the title of the thread you are posting in is called?

    Shit, you bitches and your birth certificate tears are a knee slapping joke these days. Hell, at least when WE bitched about the 2000 supreme court verdict we had the popular vote on our side.
     
  9. Meister
    Offline

    Meister VIP Member Supporting Member

    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2009
    Messages:
    25,900
    Thanks Received:
    8,099
    Trophy Points:
    63
    Location:
    Conservative part of the Northwest
    Ratings:
    +8,100
    That's where the lies started. You really didn't have the popular vote in that Florida election. Five out of six recounts proved you were lying. but, that's the way of the fucking liberals. keep telling a lie long enough and people will start to believe it. Obviously your simple mind was one of them.
     
  10. Peejay
    Offline

    Peejay BANNED

    Joined:
    Feb 11, 2009
    Messages:
    1,234
    Thanks Received:
    88
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Location:
    SC
    Ratings:
    +88
    Sounds cool to me.

    We get stem cell research.

    You get South Carolina.

    We get MIT and Berkley.

    You get Bob Jones University.

    We get all the good musicians.

    You get Rush. Limbaugh. (I know....sweet deal !)

    We get the illegals. We'll make 'em legal.

    You get to hang your own sheet rock. (it's harder than it looks.)

    We get frisbees, kites, beach balls and boomerangs.

    You get a sack full of oily seagulls.

    We get electric cars, bio diesel and hybrids.

    You get to do a lot of walking, real soon.

    We get Alaska.

    You get all the ice you can melt.

    We get planned parenthood.

    You get a bunch of pipe bombs with no place to go.

    We get Ben & Jerry's.

    You get chitlins.

    We get Motown.

    You get the Klan.

    We get inbdoor plumbing.

    You get poiosn ivy.


    I could go on.
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 2

Share This Page