Finally there are now pineapple-flavored fruit rolls in stores everywhere. I bought a massive stack of them and I'm pigging out on these thin, papery sheets of dried pineapple pulp right now....soooo tasty, I can't get enough! It proves that my nasty, stuttering (probably drunk), elderly Kindergarten teacher, Ms. Santos, was right when she told my class of 5-year-olds: "Y-Y-You sh-show me a tr-tr-tropical fru-fruit and I'll sh-sh-SHOW you a c-c-cocksucker fr-from Ha-Ha-Ha-Hawaii."
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