Growing up I had the same aspirations as most other little boys - marriage, career, college... and we all had an 'image' of what life would be like for us when we grew up.
Well, I'm grown up (just don't ask my Mom), and I still feel 'empty' on the purpose. I still feel uneasy, that same feeling I felt after schooling when the future scares and intimidates you. I have confidence in my abilities but not the confidence in my 'resume of life'. I'm confused, and honestly, am not 100% sure about what I want in life, and it's probably getting a bit late to be determining your path to your desires. I don't know if I overthink and analyze my faults too much, or if it's natural therapy and good for me. I spend a great deal of time criticizing myself and thinking of ways to improve upon, but this takes a toll on the body almost as much as physical activity.
The marriage and education are there (no wisecracks) and I had a rewarding career at most times but find myself in a rut now that just feels irreversible. I know it's not, but that's how it feels. I know what needs to be done but feel like a writer that has writers block at the beginning of writing.
I need something to snap me out of 'it'. Now, if I only knew what 'it' was.
'It' sucks.
Well, I'm grown up (just don't ask my Mom), and I still feel 'empty' on the purpose. I still feel uneasy, that same feeling I felt after schooling when the future scares and intimidates you. I have confidence in my abilities but not the confidence in my 'resume of life'. I'm confused, and honestly, am not 100% sure about what I want in life, and it's probably getting a bit late to be determining your path to your desires. I don't know if I overthink and analyze my faults too much, or if it's natural therapy and good for me. I spend a great deal of time criticizing myself and thinking of ways to improve upon, but this takes a toll on the body almost as much as physical activity.
The marriage and education are there (no wisecracks) and I had a rewarding career at most times but find myself in a rut now that just feels irreversible. I know it's not, but that's how it feels. I know what needs to be done but feel like a writer that has writers block at the beginning of writing.
I need something to snap me out of 'it'. Now, if I only knew what 'it' was.
'It' sucks.