What is the equivalent of "my dude" when addressing a female?

[Coyote]

Hm. I'm sixty now. I wonder if I could get away with "honey" or "sweetie."

Mmm….sweet cheeks? Actually…that might be more what I call a guy…

 

[BlackSand]

I need some advice from USMB folk of all political stripes.

Here's the situation: I teach special education students with behavioral issues. I am literally a "behavior teacher." Idiotic job, but that is the state of education in the US of A.

I have a counselor who has gotten involved with one of my students, and has implied criticism of the way I approach dealing with the student. I have to stomp out such behavior immediately.

She has called for a staffing (meeting) about the student, and I am sure her only goal is to slam the way I have been dealing with the student, and try to force me to change. I want to avoid that lke the plague. It is a bit of a toe-stepping for a counselor to get involved with a Special Education student's behavior, but not officially frowned on.

For my reponse, I need a form of address that carries all the condescension loosely disguised as respect/affection that "my dude" carries, but for a female.

Should I just say "my dude," even though she is female? Or is something else more appropriate? She is very progressive so a non-binary form of address would be perfect, if I knew of a non-binary form of "my dude." "My chick" doesn't seem to meet the goal of condescending without provably condescending. What say you?

TIA!

.

Be respectful in a professional setting ... If you do not feel that the meeting will go well between the two of you ...
Request a member of the Administration join you during the encounter.

Own it because you did everything you could to earn it.

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