What do you consider unforgivable in marriage??

[Bonnie]

Adam's post got me to thinking.

What do you all consider the thing or things if any that could never be forgiven in a marriage thus leading to divorce?

 

[The ClayTaurus]

Adam's post got me to thinking.

What do you all consider the thing or things if any that could never be forgiven in a marriage thus leading to divorce?

For starters, murder, rape, child molestation, those kinds of nasty crimes.

 

[JOKER96BRAVO]

Agreed, don't forget child abuse.
I would also say cheating.
There wouldn't even be a discussion.
We have an agreement to inform the other if
we ever have intensions of straying.

 

[JOKER96BRAVO]

If you're married in the church, you pledge before God to take the other person "for better or for worse." Serious thought should be given to that vow by both parties. Maybe to cut down on divorce and make people better aware of what they're getting into when they marry, couples should be required to go to marriage counseling classes for a certain length of time and show proof that they have met this requirement before they can qualify to get a marriage license.

It's a requirement if married by an Army chaplain.

 

[Adam's Apple]

If you're married in the church, you pledge before God to take the other person "for better or for worse." Serious thought should be given to that vow by both parties. Maybe to cut down on divorce and make people better aware of what they're getting into when they marry, couples should be required to go to marriage counseling classes for a certain length of time and show proof that they have met this requirement before they can qualify to get a marriage license.

The other day country singer Kenny Chesney remarked about his marriage to Renee Zellweger that they were "hotter than a pepper sprout" at the time they got married. Perhaps that's the requirement for people to get married these days? Chesney and Zellweger are not kids; both are approaching 40 and have achieved success well beyond most people's wildest dreams.

 

[Adam's Apple]

It's a requirement if married by an Army chaplain.

How does that work? How do they prove that they've had marriage counseling classes?

 

[JOKER96BRAVO]

How does that work? How do they prove that they've had marriage counseling classes?

Counseling is done by the chaplain that performs the ceremony.
Use of the facilities are free, which attracts ALOT of lower enlisted.

 

[GotZoom]

If you're married in the church, you pledge before God to take the other person "for better or for worse." Serious thought should be given to that vow by both parties. Maybe to cut down on divorce and make people better aware of what they're getting into when they marry, couples should be required to go to marriage counseling classes for a certain length of time and show proof that they have met this requirement before they can qualify to get a marriage license.

The other day country singer Kenny Chesney remarked about his marriage to Renee Zellweger that they were "hotter than a pepper sprout" at the time they got married. Perhaps that's the requirement for people to get married these days? Chesney and Zellweger are not kids; both are approaching 40 and have achieved success well beyond most people's wildest dreams.

And he is also the one who said that beaking up with Renee Zellweger was "like opening the door to your house and having someone come in and take your big-screen TV off the wall during the big game, and there's nothing you can do about it."

 

[Bonnie]

And he is also the one who said that beaking up with Renee Zellweger was "like opening the door to your house and having someone come in and take your big-screen TV off the wall during the big game, and there's nothing you can do about it."

They sound like a lovely couple

 

[Mr. P]

Adam's post got me to thinking.

What do you all consider the thing or things if any that could never be forgiven in a marriage thus leading to divorce?

A physical (sexual) relationship with the opposite sex.
Physical abuse.
Mental abuse, real not perceived.
Or one individuals actions totally destroying two peoples lives.

Other than that, it’s the “for better or worse, till death do us part” thing.

 

[Abbey Normal]

Child abuse, rape and murder go without saying.

I just can't stand liars. If I found out my husband lied to me on any serious matter, and then did it again, I wouldn't be able to trust him and I think the marriage would die a slow death.

If he decided to become a liberal, I probably wouldn't divorce him, but separate bedrooms would be necessary.

 

[5stringJeff]

I would consider divorce justifiable under three circumstances: adultery, abuse, and abandonment. That said, I would not necessarily rush off to get divorced without considering whether or not my wife and I could be reconciled.

 

[Mr. P]

I would consider divorce justifiable under three circumstances: adultery, abuse, and abandonment. That said, I would not necessarily rush off to get divorced without considering whether or not my wife and I could be reconciled.

How does one reconcile adultery? And if it's possible can it really be forgiven?
IMO, it will always hang over a relationship. Damage like that is not repairable

 

[5stringJeff]

How does one reconcile adultery? And if it's possible can it really be forgiven?
IMO, it will always hang over a relationship. Damage like that is not repairable

I know at least three couples from my church who have forgiven each other of adulterous relationships. So it's possible. But it's certainly not easy.

 

[Abbey Normal]

I know at least three couples from my church who have forgiven each other of adulterous relationships. So it's possible. But it's certainly not easy.

I think it happens a lot, but I also think it would be very hard for the wronged spouse to refrain from micro-managing the cheater's free time forever more. And to not snoop into wallets, emails, etc. Aye, what a nightmare that would be.

 

[Mr. P]

I know at least three couples from my church who have forgiven each other of adulterous relationships. So it's possible. But it's certainly not easy.

Well that’s what they say I guess, but is it the truth? Personally I think it impossible. Once that trust is broken even Humpty Dumpty can’t put er back togather again.IMO

 

[Said1]

I think it happens a lot, but I also think it would be very hard for the wronged spouse to refrain from micro-managing the cheater's free time forever more. And to not snoop into wallets, emails, etc. Aye, what a nightmare that would be.

I know a woman who "forgave" her husband of countless affairs - that she knows about. That would kill me, not to mention, I happen to be one of the biggest snoops in the world.

 

[Adam's Apple]

My sister married a guy who had many affairs behind her back. He was a school teacher, who eventually left her and his children for a 19-year-old (he was 49 at the time). They had been married for 26 years. Their youngest child was 9 at the time of the breakup, and the two older children were teenagers. Their divorce was a long, costly affair that extracted its toll on all of them in so many different ways. It affected the extended family as well. It was actually worse than dealing with a death in the family.

After the divorce, my sister and her ex-husband both remarried--him, sooner; her, later. He had a heart attack and died when he was 54. Looking back on it all several years later, my sister said that, if she had it all to do over again, she would have stayed in the marriage and kept the family together. What they all went through--emotionally and mentally--was not worth the cost they all paid. Just throwing that out there from someone who actually went through the divorce experience.

 

[Trigg]

I think it happens a lot, but I also think it would be very hard for the wronged spouse to refrain from micro-managing the cheater's free time forever more. And to not snoop into wallets, emails, etc. Aye, what a nightmare that would be.

It probably does happen more than we hear about it. As for me, I've been married for a long time and since we have kids together I would probably try to get over it and put the marriage back together. Of course it would have to be an isolated incident otherwise :chains:

 

[Bonnie]

Well that’s what they say I guess, but is it the truth? Personally I think it impossible. Once that trust is broken even Humpty Dumpty can’t put er back togather again.IMO

Im with you on this!! Aside from physical abuse and abuse to my child this is up there for top reason to divorce. I would never trust again nor would I want him even touching me again ever so yeah the marriage would be doomed unless we could be just roomates...lol yeah right that would work :teeth: