THE SEXODUS, PART 1: THE MEN GIVING UP ON WOMEN AND CHECKING OUT OF SOCIETY

[Anathema]

According to you, she doesn't have the right to her own opinion anyway. So your response is mute.

Better get that English Comprehension textbook back out, Swim. I never said she isn't allowed an opinion, just that I am the one who makes all important decisions.

 

[initforme]

If a man wants to check out, then let him "check out". Who does it affect? Nobody. If 10,000,000 men want to check out, who does it affect? Nobody. The thing is 10,000,000 men haven't checked out. What we have now is a society where it takes two working people to barely scrape by and have a family. That is why less people are getting married and more people are staying single. They are living within their means and that means no relationship building, which is no big deal in and of itself.

 

[frigidweirdo]

Or maybe he's just a dominater. I think people are just born like it.

Domination requires power. Nobody is born with sufficient power to dominate. Therefore, it is impossible to be born with enough power to be a "dominator."

The inclination to dominate other people is a learned behavior resulting from poor decisions. It requires the exertion of power. However, the motivation is to convince someone (usually one's self) that power is possessed. By exerting some kind of petty power, a person satisfies (instant gratification) their insecurities about lacking more profound and meaningful power. However, the satisfaction is temporary as it is merely a distraction. It's akin to eating a candy bar to stave off hunger caused by skipping lunch. After a short time you're hungry again, and the pangs are usually worse than before.

What? It's not about power, it's about desire to dominate. Some people want to dominate, they want to be the leader, they want to feel they're in control. Others are born to be dominated. They want to let other people take control and they're willing to let them.

They say that eldest children are more likely to grow up to dominate, youngest are likely to be more relaxed in life.

I don't believe it's learned behavior, some of it will be, as for example when you are born, before siblings, after siblings, with no siblings. But I think some people just are one type of the other. There are people who want to be their own boss, others who want to just be employees, I think a lot of it is just genetic.

 

[SwimExpert]

Some people want to dominate, they want to be the leader, they want to feel they're in control.

Being a leader is not about dominating other people. In fact, a domination complex makes for a very poor leader. A leader empowers and inspires. A dominator subjugates and suppresses. A real leader does not want to be in control, and they do not need any direct control. A person who wants to dominate tries to hold power by gripping tightly, but they fail to ever hold it. A leader possesses power by gently cradling it in an open palm.

 

[SwimExpert]

According to you, she doesn't have the right to her own opinion anyway. So your response is mute.

Better get that English Comprehension textbook back out, Swim. I never said she isn't allowed an opinion, just that I am the one who makes all important decisions.

Which is much like freedom of speech, as long as she says what you approve of.

 

[frigidweirdo]

Or maybe he's just a dominater. I think people are just born like it.

I was raised to believe that there is a proper order to society. Men have our place and women have theirs. Part of the reason I didn't get married until I was almost 40 was the difficulty in finding a woman who agreed with that philosophy and viewpoint.

And at what point does your own thinking overtake that of what you were raised to believe?

 

[frigidweirdo]

Some people want to dominate, they want to be the leader, they want to feel they're in control.

Being a leader is not about dominating other people. In fact, a domination complex makes for a very poor leader. A leader empowers and inspires. A dominator subjugates and suppresses. A real leader does not want to be in control, and they do not need any direct control. A person who wants to dominate tries to hold power by gripping tightly, but they fail to ever hold it. A leader possesses power by gently cradling it in an open palm.

Oh, I didn't say they would be good leaders. They just have this urge to lead.

A dominator does subjugate and suppress. This is probably why most people in the US are subjugated and suppressed. Those in charge of big business are doing a great job of this. Showing us why they wanted to be leaders in the first place.

Look at who wants to be subjugated, a lot of people are supporting the system that subjugates them.

They play the game, they keep the really important issues away from view and fight each other mercilessly over nonsense most of the time. All in the name of accepting.

Religion is subjugation. It always was. It was kind of the police force before the police came. You kept people down by telling them what awaited them after life, because a simple person back then with no education would never be able to argue against it.
That doesn't work so well in the modern world, so they've found other ways to make it happen.

 

[Anathema]

Which is much like freedom of speech, as long as she says what you approve of.

I don't believe in Rights as the US Constitution defines thrm. I'm more of a Privileges type of guy.

 

[Anathema]

And at what point does your own thinking overtake that of what you were raised to believe?

It doesn't just as my parents thinking didn't overtake their parents and so on.

 

[frigidweirdo]

And at what point does your own thinking overtake that of what you were raised to believe?

It doesn't just as my parents thinking didn't overtake their parents and so on.

Though i think differently from my parents. A more liberal father and a more conservative mother, they brought me up, but I have chosen my way forwards in life, and not relied on what I was told to believe.

 

[ClosedCaption]

Yes it is happening, and here's why.... We have built a society where boys/men are no longer allowed to act like boys/men. They aren't allowed to be loud, noisy, boistrous, inappropriate and aggressive. They are expected to rein in all of that energy and exhuberance to act all proper and appropriate. This stifles much of the male spirit both in youth and as they grow older. We expect them to act with much more traditionally female attitudes.

On the other side we are trying to build a society that promotes women and girls partaking in the very same behaviors, activities and personalities that we are trying to stomp out in boys/men. We want girls to be bold, ambitious, outgoing and adventurous. We tell them that they shouldn't let anything hold them back and to buck traditional stereotypes.

This dual standard confuses many males. Especially those who have grown up in traditional style families. They see it as almost a total gender reversal, and don't like that idea. Because of that, many of these males separate themselves from society and seek out the few males and females who also disregard the current mindset. I know this because for many years I was exactly taht way. Thankfully, three years ago I found a much more traditional woman, and we're now happily married..... at ages 33 (her) and 40 (me).

This should be framed. I agree 120%

 

[SwimExpert]

I don't believe in Rights as the US Constitution defines thrm. I'm more of a Privileges type of guy.

And that says all that needs to be known about you.

 

[Roadrunner]

....
This is why we need to value our elders. It also is an old-fashioned concept. If you come from a life of dysfunction and something inside you knows as a child that what is happening is wrong, look to other role models. ....

I'm fairly convinced you're just reading things out of fortune cookies now. Valuing abusive elders is bullshit. They need to be shot, not worshipped.

Respecing elders has nothing to do with this topic at all. Literaly nothing at all. You're basicaly saying I caused all the drama by not holding a door open for a lady or helping an old man cross the street. Pure bullshit.

There are a lot of "elders" at this board.

Are you about to melt into death threat mode?

 

[Roadrunner]

I think your point is that 1. Young men are sometimes ill-prepared to know what a good woman is from a general endemic problem with females in society and 2. You had a rough time of it! Geeze!....

That's not even remotely close.

My distrust of women was seeded when I was 5. What does a 5 year old know of women? In what way can a 5 year old be prepaired for anything?

At 11 an abusive stepmother was introduced into my life. Where were all these seasoned elders you speak of while I lived in her home?

At 14 my one safe haven, one of my sisters, had enough and ran away, abandoning me to deal on my own. Where were the "good women" you speak of then? Why didn't I know any of them?

At 28 my wife's clinicaly diagnosed disorders grew beyond tolorance as she consistently refused treatment. The first person she had an affair with wasn't even real; she halucinated a sexual relationship with a ghost. Where were your wise elders then as she ran off with my children into a network of crisis shelters? The year running up to my deployment, I didn't know if my children were dead or alive. Why didn't one of your elders or good women at least help me locate them or send a letter?

With all sincerity I tell you: women are literaly insane. There is something fundamentally dysfunctional with the gender.

My 'sexidus' is nothing more than placing a protective distance between myself and the hord. I choose not to give a woman power over me.

You clearly do not know what you're talking about and should probably stop posting on this topic before you make yourself look like even more of ass.

There are man-hating women here with similar stories about men.

Maybe you could hook up with one, and do mutual therapy.

Cuz dude, you is one sick puppy.

 

[Roadrunner]

Or maybe he's just a dominater. I think people are just born like it.

I was raised to believe that there is a proper order to society. Men have our place and women have theirs. Part of the reason I didn't get married until I was almost 40 was the difficulty in finding a woman who agreed with that philosophy and viewpoint.

And at what point does your own thinking overtake that of what you were raised to believe?

I know I was doing some serious questioning by four years of age.

 

[Anathema]

Though i think differently from my parents. A more liberal father and a more conservative mother, they brought me up, but I have chosen my way forwards in life, and not relied on what I was told to believe.

Whatever works for you. As fir me and mine we will continue to honor Tradition Values and Ideals.

 

[Ellipsis]

There are man-hating women here with similar stories about men.

They're welcome to participate in a thread about them. This thread, however, is about men; and I don't hate women. You would meet more sucess if you held judgment until action is required.

Maybe you could hook up with one, and do mutual therapy.

Hooking up per-se is a sign of mental illness. Hooking up with someone known to be abusive, as you suggest, is nothing less than megalomania and I'll have no part of it.

Cuz dude, you is one sick puppy.

And where are all these wise and seasoned elders who've "picked themselves up" (whatever that's supposed to mean) to adress the social illness that is men like myself? Surly you haven't run out of bumper-sticker slogans to post yet. Where are these "good women" who can magicaly close the present miles between my children and I so that I can have a normal relationship with them?

You had said that respecting elders is important for men who've stepped away from sociaty. Let's say I'm a perfect gentleman towards my elders from this moment on, how does that directly translate into seeing my children on the other side of the country? Are you saying an elder will pay my atturney's $2,000 retainer if I simply hold the door for them and say 'sir' or 'mam', and then I can take legal action? Or are you saying one of these elders will personly drive out to my children and bring them to me if I would only help that elder cross the street?

To the best of my knowledge, disrespecting elders is not the cause of any of my problems, so I fail to see how respecting elders is a solution. Respecting elders is a virtue in it's own right, it just doesn't apply to this topic in so far as I can tell. Recycling is good also, but it likewise is not related to this topic.

 

[Ellipsis]

Though i think differently from my parents. A more liberal father and a more conservative mother, they brought me up, but I have chosen my way forwards in life, and not relied on what I was told to believe.

Whatever works for you. As fir me and mine we will continue to honor Tradition Values and Ideals.

You must be referring to the "traditions, values and ideals" behind the 50% divorce rate.

 

[Ellipsis]

There are a lot of "elders" at this board.

Great. Step asside and let these wise sages speak, then.

Are you about to melt into death threat mode?

There are only 2 funerals I look forward to atending and I'm pretty sure neither are on this board, if they participate in forums at all.

 

[Ellipsis]

Truth or not?

The Sexodus Part 1 The Men Giving Up On Women And Checking Out Of Society

"In school, boys are screwed over time and again. Schools are engineered for women. In the US, they force-feed boys Ritalin like Skittles to shut them up. And while girls are favoured to fulfil quotas, men are slipping into distant second place.

"Nobody in my generation believes they're going to get a meaningful retirement. We have a third or a quarter of the wealth previous generations had, and everyone's fleeing to higher education to stave off unemployment and poverty because there are no jobs.

"All that wouldn't be so bad if we could at least dull the pain with girls. But we're treated like paedophiles and potential rapists just for showing interest. My generation are the beautiful ones," he sighs, referring to a 1960s experiment on mice that supposedly predicted a grim future for the human race.

Yes, schools are designed, not so much for females, but for a certain type of learn which happens to be more prevalent among females.

Someone made a theory of some kind about 4 types of learners.

http://www.sagepub.com/upm-data/36929_Gregory_DIBlock_Ch2.pdf (starting page 12)

There's beach ball, microscope, puppy dog and clipboard.

Schools are full of teachers who are clipboards. People who love lists, people who organise to their hearts content. It's very difficult for other teachers to get into teaching around so many clipboards. You don't organise properly and they look down on you. You teach differently and they look down on you.
The teaching clipboards do helps clipboards learn better, but boys who are generally less likely to be clipboard, find it quite difficult to learn under this style.

Also there's the type of learning with audio, visual, kinesthetic learners, in a class of 30 or more, the latter will struggle massively. Audio learners find things the easiest, because they listen attentively. Visual learners will want to draw, will want to see things, and teachers often find that this is kids being distracted, but they might be listening.

So who does better out of this? Girls usually. There are some boys.

This one size fits all approach makes many, a lot of boys, feel like they're stupid. Education as it stands now is not for them.

A person who knows this would change the system, make different teaching and learning styles for different classes and separating kids based on their learning. But no, they don't want this. You get shoved in a class and you get on with it.

Education isn't about intelligence, it's about brick walls and foreheads.

I don't think I experienced any gender discrimination through school. Not to say others haven't, but I thought it was fairly normal. Growing up, my school-related issues had to do with wanting to play instead of doing homework. I didn't feel that girls were getting special treatment.