Devils_Advocate
Diamond Member
This thread was or is being written in the Rubber Room because I have no idea where to write this and this will be very emotional for me and I may not return after this but if the moderation team feel the need to move it upstairs, to the badlands or lock or even delete it then by all means but I have to write this before I leave for Uvalde, Texas….
I have been with you guys on this board since 2014 and some of you since 2002 on the Slate, so some of you have read my rants, melts and so on but this isn’t one of them and this might be the last words I ever writ on a board because I do not how to handle today at all…
It is one thing to bury friends you love or your loved ones that reached their golden years but let me tell you burying children is not the same or dealing with their deaths.
This year has been the worst year ever for me from Covid to medical issues from Covid to Uvalde, so excuse me if I am not my chipper self today or ever again.
I am dead inside and do not care any longer what anyone feels about what I write because see when tragedy hit this hard and this Universe keep on slamming you, well you just stop caring.
I will deal with my loss and this long drive and I will comfort those while knowing I have to be the rock but do not for one moment think this tragedy was something I will take lightly.
I have made many bad choices in life and this is my punishment and I will live with this for the rest of my life while moving forward.
I am not doing any callouts in this thread nor will I tell you to stop because it is pointless, so pile it on because I am the only one that will read it because this Board is so unknown that no one come here unless they want to stay unnoticed or seen by certain people…
So give me all your hate, ridicule and I will absorb it and will not even respond…
When you finally take that long drive I will deal with then come and talk and show me how funny it is and how you will mock those deaths and when you do I will stay silent and just listen.
The monster that killed those kids and adults will never see or hear me utter it name if it spirit is still around because I will never give any monster that satisfaction nor should anyone but alas some will…
The long drive will be silent for me and I will ponder my life and I will reflect on things and I will stop for my coffee like I do when I head that way every few weeks, but I will not be me any longer…
When you lose your soul you have nothing left but unlike the monster I will keep my demon in check because if I could I would revive that monster and kill it over and over until my last dying breath and I would welcome hell for my punishment!
As you sit here and reading this please know I have no intention of hurting myself or anyone but know I am very angry and will never forgive…
So I have a very long drive that is usually a happy day for me but now will be my last day to a town that I enjoyed but now hate and will never see again…
So as you guys pen your next response and pile on me I want to thank you and remind you how special you are and when it happens to you just remember I will be here and listen and if not use this thread to post your hurt and sorrow.
With that I must drive now and I hope all of you have a beautiful and wonderful life and if I come back in a day or two please remind me of how I deserve all this and I will not say a word at all.
Bruce
Dont Taz Me Bro ,flacaltenn , AyeCantSeeYou , and Meister please review this thread and if needed to be moved please move to the proper area and if needed to be locked please do so.
Thank you and have a wonderful day and weekend and if I come back I will pen my response to the killings but not today…
I have been with you guys on this board since 2014 and some of you since 2002 on the Slate, so some of you have read my rants, melts and so on but this isn’t one of them and this might be the last words I ever writ on a board because I do not how to handle today at all…
It is one thing to bury friends you love or your loved ones that reached their golden years but let me tell you burying children is not the same or dealing with their deaths.
This year has been the worst year ever for me from Covid to medical issues from Covid to Uvalde, so excuse me if I am not my chipper self today or ever again.
I am dead inside and do not care any longer what anyone feels about what I write because see when tragedy hit this hard and this Universe keep on slamming you, well you just stop caring.
I will deal with my loss and this long drive and I will comfort those while knowing I have to be the rock but do not for one moment think this tragedy was something I will take lightly.
I have made many bad choices in life and this is my punishment and I will live with this for the rest of my life while moving forward.
I am not doing any callouts in this thread nor will I tell you to stop because it is pointless, so pile it on because I am the only one that will read it because this Board is so unknown that no one come here unless they want to stay unnoticed or seen by certain people…
So give me all your hate, ridicule and I will absorb it and will not even respond…
When you finally take that long drive I will deal with then come and talk and show me how funny it is and how you will mock those deaths and when you do I will stay silent and just listen.
The monster that killed those kids and adults will never see or hear me utter it name if it spirit is still around because I will never give any monster that satisfaction nor should anyone but alas some will…
The long drive will be silent for me and I will ponder my life and I will reflect on things and I will stop for my coffee like I do when I head that way every few weeks, but I will not be me any longer…
When you lose your soul you have nothing left but unlike the monster I will keep my demon in check because if I could I would revive that monster and kill it over and over until my last dying breath and I would welcome hell for my punishment!
As you sit here and reading this please know I have no intention of hurting myself or anyone but know I am very angry and will never forgive…
So I have a very long drive that is usually a happy day for me but now will be my last day to a town that I enjoyed but now hate and will never see again…
So as you guys pen your next response and pile on me I want to thank you and remind you how special you are and when it happens to you just remember I will be here and listen and if not use this thread to post your hurt and sorrow.
With that I must drive now and I hope all of you have a beautiful and wonderful life and if I come back in a day or two please remind me of how I deserve all this and I will not say a word at all.
Bruce
Dont Taz Me Bro ,flacaltenn , AyeCantSeeYou , and Meister please review this thread and if needed to be moved please move to the proper area and if needed to be locked please do so.
Thank you and have a wonderful day and weekend and if I come back I will pen my response to the killings but not today…
