SmarterThanYou said:
my wife has lupus as well eightball, I'm sorry you had to watch your mother pass like that. Was it her wish to live as long as possible? If it was, then you certainly weren't selfish at all.
My mother never expressed an opinion in regards to how to deal with her life, if things got bad. My father was ultimately the one that had to make the last call, but my sister and I were there to be supportive. I know that my mother suffered in pain and other discomforts right to the end.........I'm just glad that she finally was mercifully not suffering anymore.
Concerning Shiavo.........It is indeed an emotional issue. It would be nice to just let things go a certain way, and not have to be tangled in the things that seem to be part of this saga as it has unfolded today.
I wish life was just simple, but most of us know that life is a multiplicity of bonds between others. Terry Shiavo, is indeed part of a group of human bonds........parents, spouse, siblings.........and others.............Obviously, no one wants this woman to suffer..............
Suffering sometimes has a reason, and sometimes we can't see it at all......Why is there suffering? Well, if your religious, you will probably have a different "take" on it than an agnostic, and especially an agnostic who is well versed in medicine.
Never the less.......I see life as a multi-faceted thing that has impact on so much more than just the owner of that life. I try to avoid using the word "selfish" because all humans have and needs, and to a certain extent, can't function without the presence of other humans in the realm of "needs".
Terry Shiavo, was deemed "vegetative" by experts in medicine, yet, her parents sensed that there was something cognitive going on in her, as measured by her responses to their presence with her. They may have been being hopeful, yet, mysteriously, there are facets of life that even science hasn't plumbed to great depths. Is it possible that on some very deep level, that Terry was still cognitive to other humans and stimuli, yet only had the brain of a sloth. I don't know. Life is a mystery.
Was she just ingesting food and processing it as well as just breathing and exhaling air? Well, it seems that experts saw nothing more than that. They even said that her responses to her parents were not cognitive.......How did they know? I don't. Did they come to this summation based on brain wave analysis? Could something have been going on in Terry's brain that was unmeasurable to instruments?
I for one, come from the direction of hope, and more hope, until well, there's not a shadow of doubt that hope is finished.
The Terry Schiavo scenario is something that would inevitably come...........if not now..........it would come up in another scenario.........and we would be right where we are now.
These situations in life.........just have a way of bringing out something in all of us. If we had our way, we would sweep this under a rug, and proceed as though everything is just fine. These situations force us to confront important issues about life...........namely, what defines quality in life, and who should be the ultimate judge of that life. When is suffering trumping the quality of life, and when is suffering not. Still we have to define "quality". Until we have a concensus about that, the Terry Schiavo's of the world will haunt us. I doubt that there will be a concensus.
My greatest concern is that life is not looked upon as just a function of breathing, and eating, and ignores the complexities of human familial bonds that go with it. No man is an "island". Terry, was not an "island", but a complex creature with many people that love her, and only want the best for her. Some feel that Terry's best is laying in a bed, and being fed with a tube, and getting caressed by loved ones. Other's see this as a lack of quality for Terry, and feel that ending her life would be a kindness to her. Of course they see Terry's life as a type of suffering. I guess this is where I come to "logger heads" with them. I have seen painful suffering up close, in my life, and though Terry lacked in the area of brain function, her life still ticked on and didn't seem to exhibit, torturous pain, or major discomfort. In fact, I wonder if Terry even realized any discomfort with her limited brain function. Keeping her living, wasn't a guarantee that there would be positive improvements in Terry, but some were more than pleased to live with the present Terry. I really think that if her parents had witnessed a daughter who was writhing in pain, and being "morphined" to nearly a comatose condition as done with terminally ill patients, I think that there would have been a totally different approach to Terry by them(parents).
Terry Schiavo didn't project in the news videos, that she was suffering a slow painful demise. She just layed there and responded to stimuli, in a rather innocent child-like manner. Whether she had wanted her life support ended under these conditions, I don't know. Was she aware in that child-like state that she had made that proclamation to her husband some time ago, who knows?
Well, I'm saddened. If Terry dies in the next 2 weeks, and the news comes out and says, "Terry didn't feel a thing" because of great pain management.......well......have we progressed as a society/culture?.......Only time will tell. I have my ideas.
