I'm sorry to say, but the two of you demonstrate a lot of symptoms of that which adults who were abused as children would display. Protective of your feelings, so much so that you will throw away another person at the first sign of "feeling" something for them for one. Striking out at other people who love you when angry in a physical and violent manner is another. Now, I'm no psychiatrist, but I do have a lot of experience with psychiatry, and while I cannot make a diagnosis, I can certainly recognize the symptoms.
More at the link . . . .
Childhood trauma and abuse can have many effects on adult health
Abuse-related conditions
The negative impact of child abuse on adult mental health has been documented for over 150 years,
*, and, over the last thirty years, in particular, numerous research studies have documented the link between child abuse and mental illness in later life. At present, there is no single diagnosis or condition that describes the psychological effects of child abuse. When in contact with mental health services, many adult survivors of child abuse find themselves diagnosed with multiple psychological conditions, many of which have considerable overlap.
The psychological impact of abuse on a child depends on a range of factors, including: the type of abuse, the severity of abuse, the relationship of the child to the abuser/s, the child's family environment and their relationship with their parents or other caregivers, and whether the child has previous experiences of abuse, or a history of support, care and love. These factors can soften, or exacerbate, the impact of abuse on a child's psychological wellbeing, and the likelihood that they will develop mental illness later in life.
Below is a list of a range of psychological conditions that are associated with child abuse. Please read on to find out more about them.
Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder
Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) is a psychological condition that develops after a person has been harmed or exposed to danger, and they have been unable to protect themselves. PTSD is particularly likely to develop when a person experiences fear, helplessness and powerless, which are all common features of child abuse.
PTSD has three main symptoms:
- Hyperarousal is similar to the jumpy feeling that drinking too much coffee causes. We might experience it as anxiety, agitation or irritability. It is commonly known as the state of ‘fight or flight’.
- Intrusions occur when traumatic experiences dating from a person’s past, break through into their consciousness and are experienced as though they are occurring in the present. They are called "flashbacks".
- Avoidance is an attempt to defend oneself against danger by limiting contact with the world. This can involve withdrawing from others or narrowing the range of thoughts and feelings a person allows him/herself to acknowledge. Avoidance can take the form of repression (locking the memory of a traumatic event away), denial (failing to acknowledge that an event which occurred, actually happened), dissociation (altered perception) or amnesia (memory loss). Survivors subconsciously use any or all of these techniques to survive the trauma of their abuse.