Male bashing? Nahhhhh

[Mr. P]

SUMMER CLASSES FOR MEN
AT THE LEARNING CENTER FOR ADULTS

REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED By FEB. 15th. NEW CLASSES FORMING.


NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL
OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM.


Class 1
How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays --- Step by Step, with Slide Presentation.
**** I guess she still lives in the 70s, before icemakers were common in most every home.
Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.

Class 2
The Toilet Paper Roll --- Does It Change Itself?
Round Table Discussion.
****Nope, that’s a woman’s job.
Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.

Class 3
Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and
Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub? ---
Group Practice.
****If it were we’d do it. We have a reason for leaving the seat up ya know.
Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.


Class 4
Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The Floor ---
Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.
Same, same, everyone knows things on the floor are dirty, geezzzzz.
Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.

Class 5
After Dinner Dishes --- Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink?
Examples on Video.
***Don’t be stupid, that’s why women clear the table.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning
at 7:00 PM

Class 6
Loss Of Identity --- Giving The check book To Your Significant Other.
Help Line Support and Support Groups.
***Only an idiot or drunk would do that!
Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM

Class 7
Learning How To Find Things --- Starting With Looking In The Right Places
And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming.
Open Forum.
***Sounds like a woman to me.
Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.

Class 8
Health Watch --- Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health.
Graphics and Audio Tapes.
***And sometimes it pays off. To bad it’s not ALL the time or there would be more.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 9
Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost --- Real Life Testimonials.
***NO THEY DON’T!
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined.

Class 10
Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks?
Driving Simulations.
****No, it’s Humanly Impossible!
4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours.


Class 11
Learning to Live --- Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife.
Online Classes and role-playing.
*** HA! How can we when you tell us we CAN’T do something just like Mom always did?
Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined

Class 12
How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion
Relaxation Exercises, Meditation and Breathing Techniques.
***Ya want a whimp, huh? Get a gay male friend.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.

Class 13
How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy --- Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and
Other Important Dates and Calling When You're Going To Be Late.
*****Nag, nag, nag, I forgot what you said, was it important? Nahhhhh
Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 14
The Stove/Oven --- What It Is and How It Is Used.
Live Demonstration.
******They have restaurants, ya know. You cook, I'm going out.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined.

 

[rtwngAvngr]

THis Is how feminism is ruining men. Expecting us to give two shits about their Obsessive Compulsive disorders is too much to ask.

 

[Nienna]

THis Is how feminism is ruining men. Expecting us to give two shits about their Obsessive Compulsive disorders is too much to ask.

My goodness! Such bitterness!

 

[Nienna]

Here's an interesting question (at least, interesting to ME )...
BESIDES sex, why does a man want a woman as a companion or wife?

 

[GotZoom]

Here's an interesting question (at least, interesting to ME )...
BESIDES sex, why does a man want a woman as a companion or wife?

Same reason a woman wants a man as a companion and a husband.

 

[dmp]

On another board, awhile ago, I edited that very piece to be more 'real'...If i can find it, I'll re-post.

 

[dmp]

doh! was on THIS board!

AWhile ago, gop_Jeff and I replied with 'classes for women'....I can't find it though...so, I'll wing it:


CLASSES FOR WOMEN AT THE LOCAL LEARNING CENTER FOR ADULTS -

REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED BY February 28th.
NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZE WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM.

Class 1: How to Fill Up the Ice Cube Trays. Step-by-step, with Slide Presentation. Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.

Class 2: Your Car's Oil: It Doesn't it Change Itself. Round Table Discussion. Meets 2 weeks, Saturday at 12:00 for 2 hours.

Class 3: Bathroom Science: The Seat goes back UP.
Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours. (Note: this class meets at Irish's Brew Pub on 16th Street)

Class 4: Spacial Relations Between the Laundry Hamper and the Floor: "Close" counts in MORE than Hand Grenades. Pictures and Explanatory Graphics. Meeting are Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.

Class 5: After Dinner Dishes - How to get the dishes done without making too much damn noise. - Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM

Class 6: Loss of Identity - Losing the Remote to Your Significant Other.
Help Line Support and Support Groups. Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM.

Class 7: Learning How to Find Things - Starting with Putting Stuff back on the Garage floor, so he can FIND IT again.

Open Forum. Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours !

Class 8: Health Watch - Bringing 'him' beer is not harmful to 'your' health. Graphics and Audio Tapes Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 9: Real Women, When Lost, Keep their trap Shut. Real Life Testimonials.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined.

Class 10: How To Parallel Parks. Driving Simulations. 4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours..

Class 11: Learning to Live - He's not your Dad, or your Son - but take care of him as if he is.
Online Classes and role-playing

Class 12: How to Shop: 1 Item, 1 Store, 10 Minutes. Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.

http://www.usmessageboard.com/forums/showthread.php?t=17672&highlight=REGISTRATION

 

[rtwngAvngr]

My goodness! Such bitterness!

I'm better now. I took my pills.

 

[dmp]

Here's an interesting question (at least, interesting to ME )...
BESIDES sex, why does a man want a woman as a companion or wife?

Why I want a woman for a wife - by dPimp.


I want to be married to a woman because the right woman will complete me. Compliment my strengths and make-up-for my weakness. The right woman will provide insight and wisdom I won't get; a perspective I may not see without her guidance. The right woman can make me not just comfortable and secure but make me a better man. The right woman will become an outlet for my passions and desires. The right woman will smell nice doing so. Boobs. Laughter. Second only to a child's laugh is the laugh of a beautiful woman - a woman I love; more importantly (sorta selfish) but the feeling I get by making a woman laugh; providing daily quick wit (as I'm able). And perhaps the best thing - With the right woman I do those things for HER too. It's not one-sided. It's two individuals approaching this game of life (not the board game, but maybe, if we're bored - but i get to be the blue car) from unique but complimenting perspectives...sharing their intimate lives, passions, fears, joy, and hope...and junk and stuff, or whatever.


Sorta.

 

[Nienna]

Why I want a woman for a wife - by dPimp.


I want to be married to a woman because the right woman will complete me. Compliment my strengths and make-up-for my weakness. The right woman will provide insight and wisdom I won't get; a perspective I may not see without her guidance. The right woman can make me not just comfortable and secure but make me a better man. The right woman will become an outlet for my passions and desires. The right woman will smell nice doing so. Boobs. Laughter. Second only to a child's laugh is the laugh of a beautiful woman - a woman I love; more importantly (sorta selfish) but the feeling I get by making a woman laugh; providing daily quick wit (as I'm able). And perhaps the best thing - With the right woman I do those things for HER too. It's not one-sided. It's two individuals approaching this game of life (not the board game, but maybe, if we're bored - but i get to be the blue car) from unique but complimenting perspectives...sharing their intimate lives, passions, fears, joy, and hope...and junk and stuff, or whatever.


Sorta.

Thanks D!
Oh, and the red car is prettier, anyway!

 

[GotZoom]

Thanks D!
Oh, and the red car is prettier, anyway!

And they go faster too

 

[dmp]

...except Don's...cuz he can't drive a stick. :

 

[dmp]

Thanks D!
Oh, and the red car is prettier, anyway!

Any feedback on that,besides 'thanks'? I'd like a woman's viewpoint. Am I offbase? Living in fantasy world, etc?

 

[GotZoom]

...except Don's...cuz he can't drive a stick. :

Can too...the S2000 or Boxster I'm getting is stick.

 

[dmp]

Can too...the S2000 or Boxster I'm getting is stick.

Stop bragging...just say 'I don't have to - I've got a woman to drive my, er... 'a' stick

 

[Nienna]

Any feedback on that,besides 'thanks'? I'd like a woman's viewpoint. Am I offbase? Living in fantasy world, etc?

Maybe I've been reading too much C.S. Lewis, and I'm trying to overanalyze things. But RWA's comment got me to wonderin' if most men really feel this way about women.

It seems cliche that women are always wanting something "deeper" in a relationship, and men are always trying to escape. No doubt guys need other guys just to hang out with, tell strange jokes with, talk explicitly about sex and engines, just as women need other women to hang out with, tell strange jokes with, and talk explicitly about feelings and fashion.

As a woman, I can see that male and female personalities complement each other. I need my husband to protect me, to provide for the family so I can be free to nurture the children. I also want him to treat me gently, considerately, to put me first. In return I expect to give him my help, my care, and my ego-boosting admiration, and to put him first.

I can see how the male and the female "mesh" to complement one another and to fill each other's needs. But it seems to me that most (?) guys think this idea is a load. Now, women have their gripes about men, but I know where they are coming from, when they are serious about it, and that they really do see a deeper value in men. But, not being a man, I don't know if they really want something more than a maid, nanny, and sex slave, or if that idea is just one perpetuated by hopeful women, and men only put up with it in order to get what thay want.

Yeah, I've probably been reading too much Lewis.

 

[dmp]

I may lose my 'man' card for this, but I'd trade hot sex for intimacy and passion and committment.

 

[Nienna]

Why is it so hard to find both?

 

[dmp]

Why is it so hard to find both?

Indeed.


That, my wonderful lady, is the $50,000 question.

(sigh).

 

[Abbey Normal]

I may lose my 'man' card for this, but I'd trade hot sex for intimacy and passion and committment.

What's so cool is that intimacy, passion and committment often lead to... hot sex. :clap1: