Jeff Sessions takes the coward’s way out

[BlackFlag]

WASHINGTON—Following months of bruising criticism from Democrats and President Trump alike, an inconsolable Jeff Sessions was reportedly trying to commit suicide Thursday by smoking a joint. “I swore I’d never take the coward’s way out, but what choice do I have?” said a teary-eyed Sessions, carefully laying a sealed envelope containing his farewell note on a tool bench in his garage as he raised a lighter to the marijuana cigarette with trembling hands.

https://politics.theonion.com/incon...ialMarketing&utm_content=Main&utm_campaign=SF

Reports of a 4 foot long stick falling out of a giggling, elated Jeff Sessions’ ass are as yet uncorroborated

 

[Crepitus]

WASHINGTON—Following months of bruising criticism from Democrats and President Trump alike, an inconsolable Jeff Sessions was reportedly trying to commit suicide Thursday by smoking a joint. “I swore I’d never take the coward’s way out, but what choice do I have?” said a teary-eyed Sessions, carefully laying a sealed envelope containing his farewell note on a tool bench in his garage as he raised a lighter to the marijuana cigarette with trembling hands.

https://politics.theonion.com/incon...ialMarketing&utm_content=Main&utm_campaign=SF

Reports of a 4 foot long stick falling out of a giggling, elated Jeff Sessions’ ass are as yet uncorroborated

Thoughts and prayers.






For the stick.

 

[JGalt]

Poor Jeffry. A real man who screwed up as badly as he did, would have retained his honor by eating a pistol muzzle first.

 

[BlackFlag]

WASHINGTON—Following months of bruising criticism from Democrats and President Trump alike, an inconsolable Jeff Sessions was reportedly trying to commit suicide Thursday by smoking a joint. “I swore I’d never take the coward’s way out, but what choice do I have?” said a teary-eyed Sessions, carefully laying a sealed envelope containing his farewell note on a tool bench in his garage as he raised a lighter to the marijuana cigarette with trembling hands.

https://politics.theonion.com/incon...ialMarketing&utm_content=Main&utm_campaign=SF

Reports of a 4 foot long stick falling out of a giggling, elated Jeff Sessions’ ass are as yet uncorroborated

Thoughts and prayers.






For the stick.

Only way to stop a bad guy with a joint, is a good g-... actually the joint should level him out

 

[bodecea]

WASHINGTON—Following months of bruising criticism from Democrats and President Trump alike, an inconsolable Jeff Sessions was reportedly trying to commit suicide Thursday by smoking a joint. “I swore I’d never take the coward’s way out, but what choice do I have?” said a teary-eyed Sessions, carefully laying a sealed envelope containing his farewell note on a tool bench in his garage as he raised a lighter to the marijuana cigarette with trembling hands.

https://politics.theonion.com/incon...ialMarketing&utm_content=Main&utm_campaign=SF

Reports of a 4 foot long stick falling out of a giggling, elated Jeff Sessions’ ass are as yet uncorroborated

Watch out...Weatherman2020 will take this to be a real story.

 

[BlackFlag]

WASHINGTON—Following months of bruising criticism from Democrats and President Trump alike, an inconsolable Jeff Sessions was reportedly trying to commit suicide Thursday by smoking a joint. “I swore I’d never take the coward’s way out, but what choice do I have?” said a teary-eyed Sessions, carefully laying a sealed envelope containing his farewell note on a tool bench in his garage as he raised a lighter to the marijuana cigarette with trembling hands.

https://politics.theonion.com/incon...ialMarketing&utm_content=Main&utm_campaign=SF

Reports of a 4 foot long stick falling out of a giggling, elated Jeff Sessions’ ass are as yet uncorroborated

Watch out...Weatherman2020 will take this to be a real story.

I don’t think Mindwars Lite will post in this thread

 

[Votto]

WASHINGTON—Following months of bruising criticism from Democrats and President Trump alike, an inconsolable Jeff Sessions was reportedly trying to commit suicide Thursday by smoking a joint. “I swore I’d never take the coward’s way out, but what choice do I have?” said a teary-eyed Sessions, carefully laying a sealed envelope containing his farewell note on a tool bench in his garage as he raised a lighter to the marijuana cigarette with trembling hands.

https://politics.theonion.com/incon...ialMarketing&utm_content=Main&utm_campaign=SF

Reports of a 4 foot long stick falling out of a giggling, elated Jeff Sessions’ ass are as yet uncorroborated

Wait........wut?

Did you seriously just call Mr. Magoo a cowards?

 

[BlackFlag]

WASHINGTON—Following months of bruising criticism from Democrats and President Trump alike, an inconsolable Jeff Sessions was reportedly trying to commit suicide Thursday by smoking a joint. “I swore I’d never take the coward’s way out, but what choice do I have?” said a teary-eyed Sessions, carefully laying a sealed envelope containing his farewell note on a tool bench in his garage as he raised a lighter to the marijuana cigarette with trembling hands.

https://politics.theonion.com/incon...ialMarketing&utm_content=Main&utm_campaign=SF

Reports of a 4 foot long stick falling out of a giggling, elated Jeff Sessions’ ass are as yet uncorroborated

Wait........wut?

Did you seriously just call Mr. Magoo a cowards?

You didn’t have to get stoned just to participate in this thread

 

[TroglocratsRdumb]

Obama tried to kill himself by sticking his head in an electric oven

 

[BlackFlag]

Obama tried to kill himself by sticking his head in an electric oven

I suspect you just posted a personal experience you’ve had

 

[BULLDOG]

That's probably why his cookies were always so good.

 

[Votto]

Obama tried to kill himself by sticking his head in an electric oven

Say what you want about Obama, but he never lost a seat he did not sell first.

 

[BlackFlag]

Obama tried to kill himself by sticking his head in an electric oven

Say what you want about Obama, but he never lost a seat he did not sell first.

Oh yeah I remember Trump recruiting him for The Apprentice. Trump had no interest until Rod was revealed to be a criminal, Trump’s favorite type of person.