I have a disability, and after I have dealt with the mainstream medical community, I went to the alternative medical community. Most problems in the human body are caused by one of three things. Environment, diet, or genetics. Find out which one, and rectify the problem.
Modern medicine is geared toward treatment only. It is a money making endeavor.
If after doing your research, if you are sure you cannot cure yourself, then you need to find a creative way to live with your disability.
It sounds like you find this disability emasculating. If the medical device you need to wear makes you feel feminine, than find a medical device that appears masculine. I am sure you are not the ONLY person on the planet that has felt this way. If you cannot find the product you are looking for, then it looks like you have found an entrepreneurial opportunity. As it is, a quick Google image search has yielded up some results. I am sure if you took a day or two shopping on-line, I am sure will find a medical device that would help you feel comfortable with your disability if you can not find a cure.
If I did not do research, change my diet, and find ways to combat my disability, I would be in so much daily pain, I would never be able to post in this forum. As it is, I am here to help you my friend.