Help! My Freaking Cat Has Me Kidnapped!

[JimBowie1958]

Lol, this stupid cat is driving me up a wall, roflmao.

He wont eat his food unless I sit with him, so I do, but then he starts nibbling then walks away! The little furball then starts caterwauling if I leave.

So I get mad and stand over him and keep nudging him back to his food bowl to eat his food, and then he nibbles even smaller amounts!

Rather than duct tape him to his food bowl I let him go and he roams around caterwauling to get me to return and sit by him.

Isnt this being bullying by a cat? Am I not justified in letting him decide to eat or starve?

But he keeps giving me those cute little looks that just melt my resolve into pudding!

My wife is just infatuated with this little bastard and so I cant accidentally let him outside or give him away and claim the pirates stole him. Who would believe such a story anyway, but I am getting desperate.

I am thinking I might clear out a closet and put his food bowl in it and he doesnt come out until the bowl is empty; that's the ticket!

MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

 

[Tilly]

Lol, this stupid cat is driving me up a wall, roflmao.

He wont eat his food unless I sit with him, so I do, but then he starts nibbling then walks away! The little furball then starts caterwauling if I leave.

So I get mad and stand over him and keep nudging him back to his food bowl to eat his food, and then he nibbles even smaller amounts!

Rather than duct tape him to his food bowl I let him go and he roams around caterwauling to get me to return and sit by him.

Isnt this being bullying by a cat? Am I not justified in letting him decide to eat or starve?

But he keeps giving me those cute little looks that just melt my resolve into pudding!

My wife is just infatuated with this little bastard and so I cant accidentally let him outside or give him away and claim the pirates stole him. Who would believe such a story anyway, but I am getting desperate.

I am thinking I might clear out a closet and put his food bowl in it and he doesnt come out until the bowl is empty; that's the ticket!

MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

What are you feeding the cheeky little kitty?

 

[NLT]

Lol, this stupid cat is driving me up a wall, roflmao.

 

[JimBowie1958]

What are you feeding the cheeky little kitty?

Oh, he likes the food, he just wants the rest of the pride there with him when he eats.

 

[JimBowie1958]

Lol, this stupid cat is driving me up a wall, roflmao.

He is 18 years old and I dont think I will outlive him.

Not at this rate.

 

[Muhammed]

Just put on appropriate safety gear and open up a can of tuna fish.

 

[aaronleland]

My cat refuses to eat canned cat food. I've never seen an animal that would eat the dry food, but not the wet canned stuff. It's usually the opposite. My cat sucks.

 

[Care4all]

the eating slows down when they are getting ready to kick the bucket, along with the need to be catered and waited on increasing.... spend the time with him, you won't regret it and have the "I wish I had spent more time with him" feelings later...

 

[Muhammed]

Lol, this stupid cat is driving me up a wall, roflmao.

He wont eat his food unless I sit with him, so I do, but then he starts nibbling then walks away! The little furball then starts caterwauling if I leave.

So I get mad and stand over him and keep nudging him back to his food bowl to eat his food, and then he nibbles even smaller amounts!

Rather than duct tape him to his food bowl I let him go and he roams around caterwauling to get me to return and sit by him.

Isnt this being bullying by a cat? Am I not justified in letting him decide to eat or starve?

But he keeps giving me those cute little looks that just melt my resolve into pudding!

My wife is just infatuated with this little bastard and so I cant accidentally let him outside or give him away and claim the pirates stole him. Who would believe such a story anyway, but I am getting desperate.

I am thinking I might clear out a closet and put his food bowl in it and he doesnt come out until the bowl is empty; that's the ticket!

MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

Are you one of those left wing nut jobs who thinks that cats are vegetarians?

 

[JustAnotherNut]

Lol, this stupid cat is driving me up a wall, roflmao.

He wont eat his food unless I sit with him, so I do, but then he starts nibbling then walks away! The little furball then starts caterwauling if I leave.

So I get mad and stand over him and keep nudging him back to his food bowl to eat his food, and then he nibbles even smaller amounts!

Rather than duct tape him to his food bowl I let him go and he roams around caterwauling to get me to return and sit by him.

Isnt this being bullying by a cat? Am I not justified in letting him decide to eat or starve?

But he keeps giving me those cute little looks that just melt my resolve into pudding!

My wife is just infatuated with this little bastard and so I cant accidentally let him outside or give him away and claim the pirates stole him. Who would believe such a story anyway, but I am getting desperate.

I am thinking I might clear out a closet and put his food bowl in it and he doesnt come out until the bowl is empty; that's the ticket!

MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

Hey, I feel for ya. We have 2 cats but only one comes inside and they both do this....wanting us to stay with them while they eat. Atleast the outdoor cat will eventually eat on her own.

My cat refuses to eat canned cat food. I've never seen an animal that would eat the dry food, but not the wet canned stuff. It's usually the opposite. My cat sucks.

Yours isn't the only one.....both of ours will only eat the cheap dry food. I've tried giving them both some leftover chicken & bones, tuna or whatever. They will nibble at it, then look for their dry. Oh and the one cat that is indoor/outdoor, will also eat the dog food

 

[The Great Goose]

My cat refuses to eat canned cat food. I've never seen an animal that would eat the dry food, but not the wet canned stuff. It's usually the opposite. My cat sucks.

Why does that make your cat suck?

 

[Vastator]

Lol, this stupid cat is driving me up a wall, roflmao.

He wont eat his food unless I sit with him, so I do, but then he starts nibbling then walks away! The little furball then starts caterwauling if I leave.

So I get mad and stand over him and keep nudging him back to his food bowl to eat his food, and then he nibbles even smaller amounts!

Rather than duct tape him to his food bowl I let him go and he roams around caterwauling to get me to return and sit by him.

Isnt this being bullying by a cat? Am I not justified in letting him decide to eat or starve?

But he keeps giving me those cute little looks that just melt my resolve into pudding!

My wife is just infatuated with this little bastard and so I cant accidentally let him outside or give him away and claim the pirates stole him. Who would believe such a story anyway, but I am getting desperate.

I am thinking I might clear out a closet and put his food bowl in it and he doesnt come out until the bowl is empty; that's the ticket!

MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

You can never have a cat as a pet. But rather a cat will make you thier pet; if you're lucky.

 

[aaronleland]

My cat refuses to eat canned cat food. I've never seen an animal that would eat the dry food, but not the wet canned stuff. It's usually the opposite. My cat sucks.

Why does that make your cat suck?

I've had the same three cans of cat food sitting on top of my refrigerator for almost two years now. What the hell am I supposed to do with them?

 

[Auld Phart]

My cat refuses to eat canned cat food. I've never seen an animal that would eat the dry food, but not the wet canned stuff. It's usually the opposite. My cat sucks.

Last cat was like that.

dry only, no wet.

but stand out of the way when you open a can of tuna.

He'd be all over you til you set the can down so he could get the juice.

 

[Auld Phart]

My cat refuses to eat canned cat food. I've never seen an animal that would eat the dry food, but not the wet canned stuff. It's usually the opposite. My cat sucks.

Why does that make your cat suck?

I've had the same three cans of cat food sitting on top of my refrigerator for almost two years now. What the hell am I supposed to do with them?

Breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

Bon Appetit

 

[BuckToothMoron]

Lol, this stupid cat is driving me up a wall, roflmao.

He wont eat his food unless I sit with him, so I do, but then he starts nibbling then walks away! The little furball then starts caterwauling if I leave.

So I get mad and stand over him and keep nudging him back to his food bowl to eat his food, and then he nibbles even smaller amounts!

Rather than duct tape him to his food bowl I let him go and he roams around caterwauling to get me to return and sit by him.

Isnt this being bullying by a cat? Am I not justified in letting him decide to eat or starve?

But he keeps giving me those cute little looks that just melt my resolve into pudding!

My wife is just infatuated with this little bastard and so I cant accidentally let him outside or give him away and claim the pirates stole him. Who would believe such a story anyway, but I am getting desperate.

I am thinking I might clear out a closet and put his food bowl in it and he doesnt come out until the bowl is empty; that's the ticket!

MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

Damn you for causing me to read a cat story.

 

[JimBowie1958]

Lol, this stupid cat is driving me up a wall, roflmao.

He wont eat his food unless I sit with him, so I do, but then he starts nibbling then walks away! The little furball then starts caterwauling if I leave.

So I get mad and stand over him and keep nudging him back to his food bowl to eat his food, and then he nibbles even smaller amounts!

Rather than duct tape him to his food bowl I let him go and he roams around caterwauling to get me to return and sit by him.

Isnt this being bullying by a cat? Am I not justified in letting him decide to eat or starve?

But he keeps giving me those cute little looks that just melt my resolve into pudding!

My wife is just infatuated with this little bastard and so I cant accidentally let him outside or give him away and claim the pirates stole him. Who would believe such a story anyway, but I am getting desperate.

I am thinking I might clear out a closet and put his food bowl in it and he doesnt come out until the bowl is empty; that's the ticket!

MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

Are you one of those left wing nut jobs who thinks that cats are vegetarians?

No, I am one of those leftwing nut jobs who thinks that most house cats would eat their owners only if they were big enough, lol.

 

[JimBowie1958]

I've had the same three cans of cat food sitting on top of my refrigerator for almost two years now. What the hell am I supposed to do with them?

Make a casserole?

 

[OldLady]

One of my kittens was like that, but outgrew it. If this cat's 18, it doesn't have much of an appetite anymore and wants some attention, is all. But how come your wife won't take turns if she loves it so much? Or do you secretly love it as much as she does?
Jim's a closet nice guy, I bet.

 

[Muhammed]

I've had the same three cans of cat food sitting on top of my refrigerator for almost two years now. What the hell am I supposed to do with them?

Make a casserole?

And give it to the new Syrian refugee/terrorist neighbors as a "welcome to the neighborhood" gift.