Dr Fauci begs pharma companies to speed development of anti-narcissism drug!

[DrLove]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Stating that “time is of the essence,” Dr. Anthony Fauci is imploring the nation’s pharmaceutical companies to fast-track the development of a drug to treat narcissism.​

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Acknowledging that narcissistic-personality disorder has historically been resistant to medication, the esteemed virologist said that a breakthrough drug was “urgently needed.”​

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“I have seen the toll that narcissism takes, day in, day out,” Fauci said. “The human cost is incalculable.”​

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Without offering scientific evidence or data, Fauci argued, “Successfully treating one narcissist could substantially reduce the misery and suffering of millions.”​

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The epidemiologist said that, as soon as a promising anti-narcissism drug is developed, he would “personally mastermind” its clinical trials.​

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For the purpose of those trials, Fauci said, it would be optimal to manufacture the drug as a pill or anything else “that could be easily crushed and dissolved in a Diet Coke.”​

Fauci Begs Pharma Companies to Speed Development of Anti-Narcissism Drug

Without offering data, Fauci argued, “Successfully treating one narcissist could substantially reduce the misery and suffering of millions.”

www.newyorker.com

 

[Ricky LIbtardo]

The more pressing matter is a cure for TDS.

 

[Pogo]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Stating that “time is of the essence,” Dr. Anthony Fauci is imploring the nation’s pharmaceutical companies to fast-track the development of a drug to treat narcissism.​

​

Acknowledging that narcissistic-personality disorder has historically been resistant to medication, the esteemed virologist said that a breakthrough drug was “urgently needed.”​

​

“I have seen the toll that narcissism takes, day in, day out,” Fauci said. “The human cost is incalculable.”​

​

Without offering scientific evidence or data, Fauci argued, “Successfully treating one narcissist could substantially reduce the misery and suffering of millions.”​

​

The epidemiologist said that, as soon as a promising anti-narcissism drug is developed, he would “personally mastermind” its clinical trials.​

​

For the purpose of those trials, Fauci said, it would be optimal to manufacture the drug as a pill or anything else “that could be easily crushed and dissolved in a Diet Coke.”​

Fauci Begs Pharma Companies to Speed Development of Anti-Narcissism Drug

Without offering data, Fauci argued, “Successfully treating one narcissist could substantially reduce the misery and suffering of millions.”

www.newyorker.com

Absent such a vaccine, clearly the thing to do is to practice "political distancing", keeping at least six points between narcissists and their electoral challengers. Meanwhile, lock down the White House, until the deadly virus is starved of the attention it pathetically craves.

 

[two_iron]

Tiny tony has been working in his secret basement on a drug that will take a man the size of a 4th grader and morph him into a full sized adult. Hasn't worked yet.