Best Revenge Stories

[Bonnie]

What was the best revenge you ever served up on somone who screwed you over in the past???? :chains:

 

[jimnyc]

Hey, Lil, tell us the toothbrush story again!

 

[lilcountriegal]

What was the best revenge you ever served up on somone who screwed you over in the past???? :chains:

Welllllllllllllllll.... I've told this story here before, but its been a while... sooo, I'll re-tell it. ... I actually have a couple lol... I can be an evil bitch.

My personal favorite:

My daughter's dad left me after I quit my job and moved out of state to be with him... he didnt "break up" with me.. he just "never came home". SO... I peed in a cup and poured it in his fifth of whiskey. When he eventually came back over to pick up his belongings, I made sure that was on top of the box... of which he shared with his brother and his cousin later that evening. My only regret is that I didnt get to watch him drink it. I also scrubbed the toilet bowl with his toothbrush and peed on that as well. However, I DID get the joy of watching him brush his teeth afterwards.

The second:

I had a boyfriend who was a bit abusive.. mostly verbally. I had finally reached my breaking point after an argument and picked up the family cat and tossed her in the bathtub while the boyfriend was taking a bath. The cat screamed, claws out, and tried everything to get out of that bathtub but couldnt. I guess me holding the shower curtain closed didnt help much either :crutch:

 

[Mr. P]

DAMN!!!!!!!! I want your real name so I NEVER piss you off!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Bonnie]

Okay Lil first of all fantastic :rotflmao: :rotflmao: ! Secondly please tell me the cat was unharmed in the second one???

 

[Shattered]

Hey..what'd the cat do wrong???

 

[lilcountriegal]

Okay Lil first of all fantastic :rotflmao: :rotflmao: ! Secondly please tell me the cat was unharmed in the second one???

The cat was completely unharmed, a little freaked, but not hurt (the water wasnt that deep and she landed on him.. she wasnt flailing around drowning... he took up much of the tub). I loved my cat... and he always swatted her or kicked her. I was just in a complete rage and she was the first thing that I saw. I figured she took the brunt of his mood swings too, I look at it as it was her payback as well. Trust me, he was more injured than she was. Once I opened the shower curtain, she dashed out. It took him much longer to get out.

Trust me, I dont advocate tossing cats in bathtubs, especially with naked men and dangly things in them, I was 18-19 at the time and I've grown up a lot since then. Now I will simply pee on the toothbrushes.

 

[Joan]

Think I might even be able to top that one - "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned" - I was involved with a man for a few years - he was "separated" from his wife. After getting me to front him $1500 for a divorce attorney, I caught him with another woman! I politely threw all his belonging that I could find off the blacony into the parking lot. He called the next day complaining that his bathrobe was missing - I told him he could pick it up that evening - I put it in a paper bag outside my apartment door. What a surprise he must have gotten when he found the cat shit in each pocket! I then sat down and wrote a letter to his wife's attorney - stating that I would be more than willing to testify against him, with a copy to my attorney, who promptly dropped him

 

[lilcountriegal]

Think I might even be able to top that one - "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned" - I was involved with a man for a few years - he was "separated" from his wife. After getting me to front him $1500 for a divorce attorney, I caught him with another woman! I politely threw all his belonging that I could find off the blacony into the parking lot. He called the next day complaining that his bathrobe was missing - I told him he could pick it up that evening - I put it in a paper bag outside my apartment door. What a surprise he must have gotten when he found the cat shit in each pocket! I then sat down and wrote a letter to his wife's attorney - stating that I would be more than willing to testify against him, with a copy to my attorney, who promptly dropped him

LMAO Joan... that reminds me of a story that I read once (not sure if its true or not).. but I believe a scorned woman sewed shrimp (or some type of seafood?) into the hem of the curtains when she was forced to move out after catching her spouse cheating. I cant quite remember how it ended, but I know the house was fumigated and professionally cleaned on a number of occasions trying to get rid of the "stench".

I've also committed that one to memory should I ever need to use it... :cof:

 

[Shattered]

My worst was against an ex-boyfriend... At the time, you needed no proof that you owned *anything* in order to place an ad in the local newspaper (Journal/Sentinel)..

He went off on a weekend trip, I packed up my belongings, and moved out.

He came home to find the locks changed, the house up for rent, the car up for sale all via the newspaper, and all utilities turned off for 30 days as he was "on vacation" out of the country. He tried to stay in a hotel while he got things straightened out, but found himself removed from the credit cards, and the bank account.

Whoops.

 

[Bonnie]

Think I might even be able to top that one - "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned" - I was involved with a man for a few years - he was "separated" from his wife. After getting me to front him $1500 for a divorce attorney, I caught him with another woman! I politely threw all his belonging that I could find off the blacony into the parking lot. He called the next day complaining that his bathrobe was missing - I told him he could pick it up that evening - I put it in a paper bag outside my apartment door. What a surprise he must have gotten when he found the cat shit in each pocket! I then sat down and wrote a letter to his wife's attorney - stating that I would be more than willing to testify against him, with a copy to my attorney, who promptly dropped him

Bravo!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Bonnie]

My worst was against an ex-boyfriend... At the time, you needed no proof that you owned *anything* in order to place an ad in the local newspaper (Journal/Sentinel)..

He went off on a weekend trip, I packed up my belongings, and moved out.

He came home to find the locks changed, the house up for rent, the car up for sale all via the newspaper, and all utilities turned off for 30 days as he was "on vacation" out of the country. He tried to stay in a hotel while he got things straightened out, but found himself removed from the credit cards, and the bank account.

Whoops.

Wow, these are getting good!!

 

[UsaPride]

Ahhhh, ideas!!

 

[Joan]

You wanted to say something smart ass????

 

[Joan]

Figured that would shut your big mouth quick! I could (if provoked) let out more stories about you than your stupid little ass even remembers - so keep it up!!

 

[Bonnie]

Figured that would shut your big mouth quick! I could (if provoked) let out more stories about you than your stupid little ass even remembers - so keep it up!!

I might like to hear some of those..:halo: JK

 

[Shattered]

Figured that would shut your big mouth quick! I could (if provoked) let out more stories about you than your stupid little ass even remembers - so keep it up!!

I got $20....

 

[Jackass]

I might like to hear some of those..:halo: JK

Im not! Do tell Joan!! :teeth:

 

[Merlin1047]

About this time last year I was out riding my Gold Wing on some back country roads. Now for those not familiar with the current Honda flagship, the Gold Wings boasts a horizontally opposed six cylinder engine displacing 1832 cc and it will run faster than the proverbial striped-ass ape. I won't say how fast I was cruising, but one of the numbers was an eight. I came to a little wide spot in the road called Victoria. It consisted of a restaurant on one side of the road and a convenience store/gas station on the other. After coming to a stop at the intersection, I proceeded on my merry way. Approximately two miles later, I noted a strange smell, but wasn't sure of its origin. Shortly thereafter the bike started acting sluggish, like the engine was overheated. But I checked the temp gauge and everything was normal. But as I rolled along, things got progressively worse. Finally I decided to investigate and found a spot to pull off the road. As soon as I pulled the clutch lever, the bike slowed down hard. Apparently I had developed a brake problem.

I dismounted and looked at the bike but it is so cowled that you can't really see a thing unless you disassemble it. I was lying on the ground investigating the foot brake linkage when I hear a car coming. I heard it slowing and then come to a stop. "How nice" I thought - "someone stopping to see if I need help". I looked up and the woman in the car was rolling down her window. She leaned out and asked "Is this the way to Victoria?"

Well, son of a ........... I couldn't believe it. She didn't give a damn if I was stranded, she just wanted directions. Well Victoria was about two miles in the direction she was pointed. But she had pissed me off so bad that I put on my most innocent face and said "No ma'am. You've missed it by quite a bit. It's about ten miles back the way you just came." She was a little skeptical, but I gave her detailed directions. She then rolled up the window, turned around and hauled ass down the road.

The glow of successful revenge lasted only a few minutes. Then it dawned on me that I had better figure out how to get this brake problem solved before some highly irate female type came screaming back down the road. Thankfully I managed to free the balky foot brake lever and after allowing a couple of minutes for the discs to cool, I hauled ass out of there.

 

[Bonnie]

About this time last year I was out riding my Gold Wing on some back country roads. Now for those not familiar with the current Honda flagship, the Gold Wings boasts a horizontally opposed six cylinder engine displacing 1832 cc and it will run faster than the proverbial striped-ass ape. I won't say how fast I was cruising, but one of the numbers was an eight. I came to a little wide spot in the road called Victoria. It consisted of a restaurant on one side of the road and a convenience store/gas station on the other. After coming to a stop at the intersection, I proceeded on my merry way. Approximately two miles later, I noted a strange smell, but wasn't sure of its origin. Shortly thereafter the bike started acting sluggish, like the engine was overheated. But I checked the temp gauge and everything was normal. But as I rolled along, things got progressively worse. Finally I decided to investigate and found a spot to pull off the road. As soon as I pulled the clutch lever, the bike slowed down hard. Apparently I had developed a brake problem.

I dismounted and looked at the bike but it is so cowled that you can't really see a thing unless you disassemble it. I was lying on the ground investigating the foot brake linkage when I hear a car coming. I heard it slowing and then come to a stop. "How nice" I thought - "someone stopping to see if I need help". I looked up and the woman in the car was rolling down her window. She leaned out and asked "Is this the way to Victoria?"

Well, son of a ........... I couldn't believe it. She didn't give a damn if I was stranded, she just wanted directions. Well Victoria was about two miles in the direction she was pointed. But she had pissed me off so bad that I put on my most innocent face and said "No ma'am. You've missed it by quite a bit. It's about ten miles back the way you just came." She was a little skeptical, but I gave her detailed directions. She then rolled up the window, turned around and hauled ass down the road.

The glow of successful revenge lasted only a few minutes. Then it dawned on me that I had better figure out how to get this brake problem solved before some highly irate female type came screaming back down the road. Thankfully I managed to free the balky foot brake lever and after allowing a couple of minutes for the discs to cool, I hauled ass out of there.

She had that one coming..........She at LEAST could have made a call for you!!