Affairs

[TrinityPower]

I have heard people say, I didn't set out to have an affair ... it just happened.

Do you think this is possible?

Don't you think you know if you have an attraction - and - you have a choice whether to "feed" that attraction or walk away early in the game.....

.... and, if you "feed" the attraction, it's indicative you are not happy in your current relationship.....

"And today I found out I accidentally slept with a prostitute."

"You...'Accidentally slept with a prostitute?'"

"Well I didn't know she was a prostitute, but yes, yes I did."

"'Accidentally?' I don't understand. Did you slip on something?"

- "The West Wing"

I love the West Wing. Didn't watch it when it was on tv but marathoned it on Netflix awhile back. Martin Sheen was a riot

 

[Bonzi]

I have heard people say, I didn't set out to have an affair ... it just happened.

Do you think this is possible?

Don't you think you know if you have an attraction - and - you have a choice whether to "feed" that attraction or walk away early in the game.....

.... and, if you "feed" the attraction, it's indicative you are not happy in your current relationship.....

"And today I found out I accidentally slept with a prostitute."

"You...'Accidentally slept with a prostitute?'"

"Well I didn't know she was a prostitute, but yes, yes I did."

"'Accidentally?' I don't understand. Did you slip on something?"

- "The West Wing"

I love the West Wing. Didn't watch it when it was on tv but marathoned it on Netflix awhile back. Martin Sheen was a riot

the smartest most clever show on TV (or, that WAS on tv)

 

[TrinityPower]

Here is a song by Reba that sums it up called One Promise Too Late
I would have waited forever
If I'd known that you'd be here
We could have shared our lives together
And held each other close all through the years
But I've met someone before you
And my heart just couldn't wait
So no matter how much I adore you
I've got to stand behind the promise that I made
Where were you
When I could have loved you
Where were you
When I gave my heart away
All my life I've been dreaming of you
You came along one promise too late
You came along one promise too late
I won't say that I'm sorry that I met you
I can't have you but I never will forget you
Where were you
When I could have loved you
Where were you
When I gave my heart away
All my life I've been dreaming of you
You came along one promise too late

 

[TrinityPower]

I have heard people say, I didn't set out to have an affair ... it just happened.

Do you think this is possible?

Don't you think you know if you have an attraction - and - you have a choice whether to "feed" that attraction or walk away early in the game.....

.... and, if you "feed" the attraction, it's indicative you are not happy in your current relationship.....

"And today I found out I accidentally slept with a prostitute."

"You...'Accidentally slept with a prostitute?'"

"Well I didn't know she was a prostitute, but yes, yes I did."

"'Accidentally?' I don't understand. Did you slip on something?"

- "The West Wing"

I love the West Wing. Didn't watch it when it was on tv but marathoned it on Netflix awhile back. Martin Sheen was a riot

the smartest most clever show on TV (or, that WAS on tv)

If I remember right one of the first lines in the pilot set the tone for the show. Leo said something like Laws are like sausages. Everyone likes them but they don't want to know how they are made

 

[Bonzi]

Wasn't Ashley Madisons theme "save your marriage, have an affair"? lol

Unfortunately, it may be true in a lot of cases. Especially if the only thing that is dissatisfying to you in your marriage is the sex.....

 

[TrinityPower]

Sorry. I didn't mean to derail your thread

 

[Bonzi]

Do you think it's possible for someone totally happy in their marriage to NEVER be tempted???

If you are tempted, then you weren't totally committed to the relationship in the first place.

Depends on what "tempted" means.... if a women comes up to you and is flirting, you may have a passing thought.... is that temptation? Or do you have to have a real opportunity to consider?

 

[IlarMeilyr]

Do you think it's possible for someone totally happy in their marriage to NEVER be tempted???

If you are tempted, then you weren't totally committed to the relationship in the first place.

Again, nonsense. I have been married for over 20 years and have never strayed. I actually do love my wife.

But I have found myself attracted (not just to the outward appearance) of a few ladies in the intervening years.

One might even be more or less accurate in saying I felt some temptation.

But I made a choice to honor my own promise. Something about "vows." And I am FAR from unique. Temptation is, maybe, even unavoidable. Choosing to "behave" is not.

 

[Bonzi]

Sorry. I didn't mean to derail your thread

You can do whatever you want in my thread. I'm not anal about that stuff!

 

[Bonzi]

Do you think it's possible for someone totally happy in their marriage to NEVER be tempted???

If you are tempted, then you weren't totally committed to the relationship in the first place.

Again, nonsense. I have been married for over 20 years and have never strayed. I actually do love my wife.

But I have found myself attracted (not just to the outward appearance) of a few ladies in the intervening years.

One might even be more or less accurate in saying I felt some temptation.

But I made a choice to honor my own promise. Something about "vows." And I am FAR from unique. Temptation is, maybe, even unavoidable. Choosing to "behave" is not.

I happen to be of the opinion that people that have affairs are weak and afraid.

 

[TrinityPower]

Affairs can happen but (and can only speak from a woman's perspective) something has to be majorly missing from the relationship or lack of relationship with the spouse. When only one partner is participating in a marriage it isn't really a marriage or partnership or relationship. If you still have sex then it is just having relations. My biased opinion of course

 

[TNHarley]

I'm not anal

Turnoff

 

[Bonzi]

Here is a song by Reba that sums it up called One Promise Too Late
I would have waited forever
If I'd known that you'd be here
We could have shared our lives together
And held each other close all through the years
But I've met someone before you
And my heart just couldn't wait
So no matter how much I adore you
I've got to stand behind the promise that I made
Where were you
When I could have loved you
Where were you
When I gave my heart away
All my life I've been dreaming of you
You came along one promise too late
You came along one promise too late
I won't say that I'm sorry that I met you
I can't have you but I never will forget you
Where were you
When I could have loved you
Where were you
When I gave my heart away
All my life I've been dreaming of you
You came along one promise too late

That's sad.... But it makes a statement about a "one and only true love" or "love at first sight"
I'm not sure you can feel that way about someone instantly, it has to be fed, I believe.... and if you sense you might be able to love someone, right at the start, you need to avoid them.

 

[Bonzi]

I'm not anal

Turnoff

anal is a turn off
or not being anal? LOL!

 

[TrinityPower]

I don't believe that one should stay in a marriage if they or the children are abused and sometimes affairs occur to escape that dark cloud

 

[TNHarley]

I'm not anal

Turnoff

anal is a turn off
or not being anal? LOL!

I was just being a perv lol

 

[Bonzi]

I'm not anal

Turnoff

anal is a turn off
or not being anal? LOL!

I was just being a perv lol

oh well in that case.... <like I didn't know this....>

 

[Anathema]

Depends on what "tempted" means.... if a women comes up to you and is flirting, you may have a passing thought.... is that temptation? Or do you have to have a real opportunity to consider?

If a woman is hitting on me or flirting with me it's my job to remove mysekf from thst situation. If you're thinking about it, you've akready committed adultery.

 

[Anathema]

But I made a choice to honor my own promise. Something about "vows." And I am FAR from unique. Temptation is, maybe, even unavoidable. Choosing to "behave" is not.

It's mostly avoidable. There us no choice. That was made when you said "I do" to your wife, as I did to mine in 2014.

 

[Penelope]

Here is a song by Reba that sums it up called One Promise Too Late
I would have waited forever
If I'd known that you'd be here
We could have shared our lives together
And held each other close all through the years
But I've met someone before you
And my heart just couldn't wait
So no matter how much I adore you
I've got to stand behind the promise that I made
Where were you
When I could have loved you
Where were you
When I gave my heart away
All my life I've been dreaming of you
You came along one promise too late
You came along one promise too late
I won't say that I'm sorry that I met you
I can't have you but I never will forget you
Where were you
When I could have loved you
Where were you
When I gave my heart away
All my life I've been dreaming of you
You came along one promise too late

If my husband wrote that about someone else, I'd say go for it, as I wouldn't want him anymore. Too me that is worst than a physical affair.