Woman charged with raping boy, 14

[catzmeow]

and sometimes you should read the entire thread to see that I've seen that I might've been over simplifying things a bit and was wrong in my previous opinion.

And yet, you're still making jokes about it and acting dismissive of those who've held you accountable for your faulty thinking.

 

[Silence]

And yet, you're still making jokes about it and acting dismissive of those who've held you accountable for your faulty thinking.

read up. I'm not making jokes or being dismissive in the least

and I've held MYSELF accountable for my faulty thinking...I don't need some asshole on a message board to tell me I was wrong....I figured it out on my own....but thanks for playing

 

[Cecilie1200]

I hate to tell you this but boys are different from girls. i know it's not PC to say that but really a 14 year old boy having sex with an older woman is NOT the same as a 14 year old girl with an older man.

I hate to tell you this, but there is no difference between boys and girls that makes a 14-year-old child anything other than a child. And this disgusting, vicarious crap that adult men come up with - "What boy wouldn't love to have an older woman seduce him?" - is an insult to not only decency but intelligence and common sense. My son is 13, and he'd also love to eat potato chips and chocolate milk for every meal. Does that mean I would be any less of an abusive, neglectful parent if I let him do so? Children often desperately want what would be absolutely the worst thing for them. That's the reason nature gives them responsible adults to protect them.

 

[Cecilie1200]

It depends on how you look at it. A girl seduced by an older man might accept it willingly, then realize later on that she was taken advantage of, creating emotional scars. A boy would have a more difficult time thinking that he was taken advantage of, simply because of his body's physical response during the relationship.

Oh, yeah. Because 14-year-old girls don't have any physical responses to sex, and the fact that something bad and harmful was also pleasurable negates any psychological damage it did, rather than exacerbating it.

 

[Cecilie1200]

Here we go again

I'll just sum up my views and leave it at that for the moment.

As I said in the other thread - it's different. A man who is after an underage girl wants to do her, a woman that''s after an underage lad wants him to do her. Different. Still wrong at law but qualitatively different. I'l chuck this in too, the penalty for a woman seducing an underage lad should be less because there's less chance of harm.

We have hyper-sexualised societies, not surprised this is happening a lot, well apparently it is.

I would love to have you show me the reputable psychiatric study that shows that because a woman wants a boy to do her, rather than wanting to do him, that amounts to "less chance of harm". PLEASE. Prove to me that adolescent boys who are used and molested by women old enough to be their mothers don't sustain mental and emotional scars just as adolescent girls molested by older men do.

Personally, I'm sitting here, looking at my 13-year-old son watching cartoons and playing with his Christmas toys, trying to picture some manky bitch two years younger than me finding him sexually attractive, and I'm thinking, "They would never, EVER find all the body parts."

 

[catzmeow]

read up. I'm not making jokes or being dismissive in the least

and I've held MYSELF accountable for my faulty thinking...I don't need some asshole on a message board to tell me I was wrong....I figured it out on my own....but thanks for playing

ORLY?

Silence, at 9:55 a.m., today:

you really are taking this shit way to serious sho..... were you abused by a teacher as a young man? I only ask because you seem SO certain that this would cause psychological damage to the boy in question and it sure seems like you've got some issues and that would explain A LOT about you.

That's exactly what you were doing, and that's exactly what I responded to.

 

[Cecilie1200]

Actually, what I said was that about 75% of my brain was messed up.

But again, if one of my good looking teachers lifted her skirt for me I would have been all over it, and I wouldn't have felt like I was taken advantage of afterwards. I don't think many guys would.

Then you need to get out of your fantasies and vicarious thrills and hit some reality. Go talk to some psychiatrists who actually have to deal with patients who were molested at the age of 14. Better yet, go talk to some 14-year-old boys and realize that they're CHILDREN, not the pseudo-adults you imagine you remember being at that age.

Like I said in an earlier post, "I would have been all over it" means nothing. My son would be all over eating potato chips and chocolate milk for every meal, but that doesn't make it a good thing.

 

[Andrew2382]

I disagree....I would have railed my 7th grade teacher if given the oppurtunity...she was smokin.

 

[Cecilie1200]

I disagree....I would have railed my 7th grade teacher if given the oppurtunity...she was smokin.

And again, it would be very nice if you could spare us all the sleazy projection of your sick, adult fantasies onto the teenager you actually were, much less the teenager other people currently are. However much you think NOW "Ooh, it would have been SO COOL", the fact is that 14-year-old boys are no more ready to deal with the mental and emotional fallout of early sex than girls are, and ANY 38-year-old who is having sex with a 14-year-old is sick, demented, and perverted.

 

[Valerie]

Then you need to get out of your fantasies and vicarious thrills and hit some reality. Go talk to some psychiatrists who actually have to deal with patients who were molested at the age of 14. Better yet, go talk to some 14-year-old boys and realize that they're CHILDREN, not the pseudo-adults you imagine you remember being at that age.

Like I said in an earlier post, "I would have been all over it" means nothing. My son would be all over eating potato chips and chocolate milk for every meal, but that doesn't make it a good thing.

Exactly.

 

[Andrew2382]

And again, it would be very nice if you could spare us all the sleazy projection of your sick, adult fantasies onto the teenager you actually were, much less the teenager other people currently are. However much you think NOW "Ooh, it would have been SO COOL", the fact is that 14-year-old boys are no more ready to deal with the mental and emotional fallout of early sex than girls are, and ANY 38-year-old who is having sex with a 14-year-old is sick, demented, and perverted.

She was probably in her early 30's late 20's

I am not disagreeing with you she woul dhave been sick

I am not saying it's any different mentally or emotinally for a teenage girl or boy that has sex expecially with an adult


I'm just saying given the oppurtunity. I would have banged her. Believe it or not, whatever protected world you live in...there are plenty of teenage boys and girls screwin each other in today's world. Is it right? No...Is it safe? No..does it happen regardless of what you think...Yes

 

[Cecilie1200]

She was probably in her early 30's late 20's

I am not disagreeing with you she woul dhave been sick

I am not saying it's any different mentally or emotinally for a teenage girl or boy that has sex expecially with an adult

I'm just saying given the oppurtunity. I would have banged her. Believe it or not, whatever protected world you live in...there are plenty of teenage boys and girls screwin each other in today's world. Is it right? No...Is it safe? No..does it happen regardless of what you think...Yes

Did I ever say I thought it didn't happen? No. Does the fact that teenagers do stupid things make it okay for allegedly responsible adults to turn a blind eye to it? No. Do I find your attitude nauseating and disgusting? Yes.

Believe it or not, I can live in the real world where bad things happen and have the morals and intelligence to stand up and say, "That's still a bad thing." Maybe you should try it once in a while. Being a decent human being is actually rather refreshing.

 

[Tech_Esq]

And again, it would be very nice if you could spare us all the sleazy projection of your sick, adult fantasies onto the teenager you actually were, much less the teenager other people currently are. However much you think NOW "Ooh, it would have been SO COOL", the fact is that 14-year-old boys are no more ready to deal with the mental and emotional fallout of early sex than girls are, and ANY 38-year-old who is having sex with a 14-year-old is sick, demented, and perverted.

You are living in a world of motherhood denial. Believe me, having been a 14 year old once and further having raised two children successfully to adulthood (and two more are in their teens now). It is wrong and even dangerous for you as a responsible parent to think in this manner.

You need to become much more circumspect. If you think the hormone fairy isn't coming for your little boy, you are in denial and reality is not likely to take pity on you. Wake up and get on the ball so you don't get blind-sided.

When I was 14 sure I was playing with my football cards and hell I watched cartoons when I was 2 years into my tour in the Army. Meaningless. I still woulda done my 10th grade Biology teacher and she wasn't even all that hot. But I was horny as hell and looking to loose that virgin tag real bad.

 

[catzmeow]

And again, it would be very nice if you could spare us all the sleazy projection of your sick, adult fantasies onto the teenager you actually were, much less the teenager other people currently are. However much you think NOW "Ooh, it would have been SO COOL", the fact is that 14-year-old boys are no more ready to deal with the mental and emotional fallout of early sex than girls are, and ANY 38-year-old who is having sex with a 14-year-old is sick, demented, and perverted.

I dated a guy whose first initiation to sex was when he was 13, with a 17-year-old neighbor girl. He told me once: "It was weird. I enjoyed it, but afterwards, it felt really wrong, and I was ashamed to have sex for a long time after that."

This guy was a ball-o-issues. I'm not saying that it was the sole thing that screwed him up, but that's something you will also see with male victims of adult female perpetrators...they come from dysfunctional homes with violence and substance abuse issues, and they're already screwed up. Add the sexual issues on top of that, and it makes for a mess.

That's the thing. So many child victims of adult perpetrators are not only already victims (abuse/neglect), but become victims of multiple abusers.

And, having worked with kids who were sexually abused professionall, years after the fact...you can tell. Their emotions are all jumbled up and their perceptions of the world are OFF. one of my clients, Cameron, grew up in an abusive/neglectful home, was removed from custody, was then sexually abused by a female caregiver, then a removed from that placement, put with an uncle who also sexually abused him, and then was molested by a boy scout leader. I started working with him when he was a 17-year-old gang member, and it didn't surprise me in the least when he was eventually involved in a homicide. This young man had been so emotionally damaged by so many adults who should have been trustworthy that he could not relate to human beings on any level. It was sad. And, the adults in his life let it happen, the people who should have protected him were the ones who destroyed him.

 

[Shogun]

I still woulda done my 10th grade Biology teacher and she wasn't even all that hot. But I was horny as hell and looking to loose that virgin tag real bad.


and, had you woken up one morning with a baby, Aids or herpes I guess your 14 year old ass would have been stoic like a fucking rock about the prospects of your new take on the rest of your life, eh?

 

[catzmeow]

You are living in a world of motherhood denial. Believe me, having been a 14 year old once and further having raised two children successfully to adulthood (and two more are in their teens now). It is wrong and even dangerous for you as a responsible parent to think in this manner.

You need to become much more circumspect. If you think the hormone fairy isn't coming for your little boy, you are in denial and reality is not likely to take pity on you. Wake up and get on the ball so you don't get blind-sided.

When I was 14 sure I was playing with my football cards and hell I watched cartoons when I was 2 years into my tour in the Army. Meaningless. I still woulda done my 10th grade Biology teacher and she wasn't even all that hot. But I was horny as hell and looking to loose that virgin tag real bad.

You need to clue it up. I'm really clear on where my daughter is, sexually. She's 15, and I know PRECISELY how far she's gone, physically. I realize I'm fighting a losing battle against her hormones and horniness.

Having said that, the fact of the matter is that a teacher or other adults have a responsibility in our interactions with young people, particularly teenagers, not to abuse our positions of power and trust. No matter how badly you might have wanted to bang your 10th grade teacher, IT IS PART OF HER JOB TO NEVER CROSS THAT LINE. The idea that an adult crossing that line is acceptable simply because the child wants to is complete and utter bullshit.

Just like, even though I know that my daughter will be at some point sexually active, it is part of my job to do what I can to postpone that until she's as emotionally mature as possible. It's also my job to prepare her for that inevitability in such a way that she is able to manage her sexual activities responsibly, and so she doesn't damage herself.

My daughter will be driving soon. Since that's the case, should I just put a 5th of Jack and the car keys in her hand today so she can get started?

You and others are engaged in sexually biased diminishing of the victimization of young men. It's crap.

 

[Andrew2382]

Did I ever say I thought it didn't happen? No. Does the fact that teenagers do stupid things make it okay for allegedly responsible adults to turn a blind eye to it? No. Do I find your attitude nauseating and disgusting? Yes.

Believe it or not, I can live in the real world where bad things happen and have the morals and intelligence to stand up and say, "That's still a bad thing." Maybe you should try it once in a while. Being a decent human being is actually rather refreshing.

Guess what...no matter what you do, teeangers are going to screw...thats what they do. A responsible adult wouldn't turn a blind eye to it. Once my son reaches that age I plan on having a talk with him about sex and the responsibility of sex and the reprucussions that can come from it.

Usually when you educate the child that will make a better decision, but that still doesn't mean that if my son is 14, and 15 years old and his girlfriend is offering to blow him he is going to say no.

Just because you stand up and say "tisk tisk, you shouldn't do that" doesn't mean the boy or girl won't throw you the finger as they are fuckin each other.

An intelligent adult would try to educate the youth rather then trying to prevent the inevitable.

 

[Andrew2382]

I still woulda done my 10th grade Biology teacher and she wasn't even all that hot. But I was horny as hell and looking to loose that virgin tag real bad.


and, had you woken up one morning with a baby, Aids or herpes I guess your 14 year old ass would have been stoic like a fucking rock about the prospects of your new take on the rest of your life, eh?

THis comment is irrelevant because that has nothing to do with age. He coul dhave been 21 banged his college professor as 2 consenting adults and still could have gotten aids/herpes or a pregnancy etc..

 

[catzmeow]

Guess what...no matter what you do, teeangers are going to screw...thats what they do. A responsible adult wouldn't turn a blind eye to it. Once my son reaches that age I plan on having a talk with him about sex and the responsibility of sex and the reprucussions that can come from it.

You bet they are. I doubt seriously that there is anyone on this thread who doesn't get that.

We're talking about the difference between the role of parents in preparing their children for sexual maturity and/or responsibility, and the fact that some adults cross the line and actually have sex with teens. There's a fucking difference. Adults should not be having sex with teens, even if the teenagers think they want it.

There is a lot out there that teenagers think they want, and a lot of the things the teenagers think they want will do them harm, and many teens haven't fully thought through the consequences of their actions yet. Adults are the ones who are responsible to say no, whether it's to fucking a kid in your 10th grade class, or to your child drinking/driving or having sex without a condom.

 

[Shogun]

THis comment is irrelevant because that has nothing to do with age. He coul dhave been 21 banged his college professor as 2 consenting adults and still could have gotten aids/herpes or a pregnancy etc..

oh it has everything to do with his age. I hate to break it to you but 14 year old fathers don't tend to be giant examples of personal success. Indeed, those ADULTS would have been emotionally closer to adulthood and able to handle the prospect of living with the consequences of their mistakes.. unlike a fucking 14 year old.