Thoughts On Growing Old

[Rikurzhen]

BS you raise kids to earn a good income and move in with them...

Two of my kids are earning more than dear old dad. Moving in with them is the last thing I'd impose upon them. Would never ask them for a dime. Altho one still owes me $2,500 from about 5 years ago LOL.

Not meaning to direct this at you personally, but I find this mindset troubling in light of these two facts:

I'd much rather retired folks moved in with their kids and were supported by their kids rather than sticking taxpayers with the cost. I'm planning on that with my parents/in-laws when the time comes.

Well y'know... thanks for that. In some cultures such as Japan, they accept their bound duty to care for elderly family.

But this is the U.S. where neither culture nor duty exist. At least not on the level of the Japanese.

The elderly/retirees in this country didn't construct the tax code. Nor should they suffer by it.

To burden children with your presence in order to avoid "sticking taxpayers with the cost" is quite honestly one of the most fucked-up ideas I've ever heard.

Not meaning to direct this at you personally.

Strangers have more obligation to pay for our care when we're elderly than do our kids?

Well isn't that part of WHAT THE FUCK the ACA (Obamacare) is all about?

While working, we pay out the ass to Medicare and Social Security. THEN we enroll with Medicaid.

What the fuck is that all about?

I'm a business owner. I see... no I PAY my employee's contributions to Medicare and Social Security. And I pay into the Unemployment Compensation system. And as an EMPLOYEE I pay out the same bullshit!

I've spent the last 40 years paying into SS and Medicare. It's called FICA.

Well, FUCK FICA.

Hey- if you burden your children with yourself then you're nothing better than a white trailer trash bitch.

IF your children burden themselves with YOU... then you are one blessed and lucky motherfucker.

You see the difference?

Look at that first graph again. Everything that an employee + employer + accumulated interest earnings on those FICA deductions over the course of an average person's working life amount to is not enough to pay for the care that the average person is going to consume over their retirement. The rest will have to come from poor young people. Look at the 2nd graph. Rich old people cared for by taxing poor young people.

The system is not stable, it's not self-sustaining. That's the problem and that problem is only getting worse. At some point the costs will be so great that the system will collapse because young people won't sacrifice their own wellbeing with 40% FICA deductions plus income tax in order to pay for the care of the elderly. To compound the problem, medical advances are allowing people to live longer, thus increasing the amount of subsidy that is going to go to the elderly.

If we had an actuarially sound system, where employee + employer deductions + accumulated compound interest resulted in the average person drawing down their contributions and when they died the accounts came near to balancing (contribution = withdrawal) (not individually but as a yearly cohort) then we wouldn't have a problem, but that would mean seriously jacking up FICA taxes. Look at that first graph again.

Remember that SS and Medicare were set up like Ponzi schemes, depending on many contributors to care for 1 recipient. That ratio is nearing 2:1 now and it's going to get worse.

 

[Mr. H.]

Two of my kids are earning more than dear old dad. Moving in with them is the last thing I'd impose upon them. Would never ask them for a dime. Altho one still owes me $2,500 from about 5 years ago LOL.

Not meaning to direct this at you personally, but I find this mindset troubling in light of these two facts:

I'd much rather retired folks moved in with their kids and were supported by their kids rather than sticking taxpayers with the cost. I'm planning on that with my parents/in-laws when the time comes.

Well y'know... thanks for that. In some cultures such as Japan, they accept their bound duty to care for elderly family.

But this is the U.S. where neither culture nor duty exist. At least not on the level of the Japanese.

The elderly/retirees in this country didn't construct the tax code. Nor should they suffer by it.

To burden children with your presence in order to avoid "sticking taxpayers with the cost" is quite honestly one of the most fucked-up ideas I've ever heard.

Not meaning to direct this at you personally.

Strangers have more obligation to pay for our care when we're elderly than do our kids?

Well isn't that part of WHAT THE FUCK the ACA (Obamacare) is all about?

While working, we pay out the ass to Medicare and Social Security. THEN we enroll with Medicaid.

What the fuck is that all about?

I'm a business owner. I see... no I PAY my employee's contributions to Medicare and Social Security. And I pay into the Unemployment Compensation system. And as an EMPLOYEE I pay out the same bullshit!

I've spent the last 40 years paying into SS and Medicare. It's called FICA.

Well, FUCK FICA.

Hey- if you burden your children with yourself then you're nothing better than a white trailer trash bitch.

IF your children burden themselves with YOU... then you are one blessed and lucky motherfucker.

You see the difference?

Look at that first graph again. Everything that an employee + employer + accumulated interest earnings on those FICA deductions over the course of an average person's working life amount to is not enough to pay for the care that the average person is going to consume over their retirement. The rest will have to come from poor young people. Look at the 2nd graph. Rich old people cared for by taxing poor young people.

The system is not stable, it's not self-sustaining. That's the problem and that problem is only getting worse. At some point the costs will be so great that the system will collapse because young people won't sacrifice their own wellbeing with 40% FICA deductions plus income tax in order to pay for the care of the elderly. To compound the problem, medical advances are allowing people to live longer, thus increasing the amount of subsidy that is going to go to the elderly.

If we had an actuarially sound system, where employee + employer deductions + accumulated compound interest resulted in the average person drawing down their contributions and when they died the accounts came near to balancing (contribution = withdrawal) (not individually but as a yearly cohort) then we wouldn't have a problem, but that would mean seriously jacking up FICA taxes. Look at that first graph again.

Remember that SS and Medicare were set up like Ponzi schemes, depending on many contributors to care for 1 recipient. That ratio is nearing 2:1 now and it's going to get worse.

Gosh dang that's a swell post.

 

[Gracie]

I just want a place to stash my crap so I can hit the road and see the USA......

Some folks buy a travel trailer and just sell everything else they can't take with them. I guess you could store a lot of it too. There is a group that helps rebuild places after disasters that move all over the place.

How did you know? I'm currently planning on pulling stakes and dragging the 28' trailer I' ve been living in for the last 7 years South.

Deep down..I bought this van for one purpose. A roof. I don't own this house. Someday, the owner is going to want it back. I can't pull a trailer, but I damn sure can park my van somewhere and have a roof and a bed. All I need is gas money. And the ability to drive. And when I can't drive any more, I hope to find some nice person who will let me park on their land out by the barn. They won't have to put up with me for long. When I hit 75, I will drive that van right off the nearest cliff and trust me..I know where they are and the best drop offs, lol.

 

[Moonglow]

There is a lady around here that lives in an old school bus...

 

[AVG-JOE]

Excellent post. Saving and investing in order to have a self-sufficient retirement should be a part of one's financial lifestyle.

Saving, investing and giving a shit about one's financial lifestyle should be taught in high school.

Just sayin'...​

 

[Gagafritz]

What is everyone's opinion on acting older? My grandparents seemed to accept acting older in dress, behavior and socially. I see more rebels in that regard these days.

It's kind of a No Win. I mean which is worse? Looking older and acting older? Or looking older and trying to act "younger"? Either way you lose, lol. I mean look at some of the aging Celebs. Some manage to pull it off. But, some keep trying to look like they did when they were 20 and they just look like tired , worn out versions of their former selves. Kind of a tough balancing act.
However, my advice, is just be who you ARE and heck with what people think. If you like wearing a granny robe and slippers, well heck you have done the walk of life so wear what you want. If you want to wear leather and drive a Harley, then go for it.

 

[Samson]

I just want a place to stash my crap so I can hit the road and see the USA......

Some folks buy a travel trailer and just sell everything else they can't take with them. I guess you could store a lot of it too. There is a group that helps rebuild places after disasters that move all over the place.

How did you know? I'm currently planning on pulling stakes and dragging the 28' trailer I' ve been living in for the last 7 years South.

Deep down..I bought this van for one purpose. A roof. I don't own this house. Someday, the owner is going to want it back. I can't pull a trailer, but I damn sure can park my van somewhere and have a roof and a bed. All I need is gas money. And the ability to drive. And when I can't drive any more, I hope to find some nice person who will let me park on their land out by the barn. They won't have to put up with me for long. When I hit 75, I will drive that van right off the nearest cliff and trust me..I know where they are and the best drop offs, lol.

Death by Van Crashing doesn't sound terribly...um, quick, nor necessarily painless. At best, you've left behind a legacy of environmental pollution. For years, cops and rescue workers will pass the crash site thinking, "yep, that's where that bitch decided to run off the road, and it took us all day and night to reach her. Then she died shortly thereafter with the gear shaft running right through her abdomen."

 

[Samson]

Very religious guy- but something he told my friend surprised me. He said "Paul, the more I think about it the more I believe that this is all there is and there's nothing on the other side. Just... nothing".

Given that the primary concern of religion is the after-life, shortly before Death seems the least opportune time to conclude, "there is nothing on the other side."

 

[boedicca]

Excellent post. Saving and investing in order to have a self-sufficient retirement should be a part of one's financial lifestyle.

Saving, investing and giving a shit about one's financial lifestyle should be taught in high school.

Just sayin'...​

And also by parents who set a good example. I remember my dad taking me to the bank to set up a saving account when I was in grade school.

 

[boedicca]

BS you raise kids to earn a good income and move in with them...

Two of my kids are earning more than dear old dad. Moving in with them is the last thing I'd impose upon them. Would never ask them for a dime. Altho one still owes me $2,500 from about 5 years ago LOL.

Not meaning to direct this at you personally, but I find this mindset troubling in light of these two facts:

I'd much rather retired folks moved in with their kids and were supported by their kids rather than sticking taxpayers with the cost. I'm planning on that with my parents/in-laws when the time comes.

Well y'know... thanks for that. In some cultures such as Japan, they accept their bound duty to care for elderly family.

But this is the U.S. where neither culture nor duty exist. At least not on the level of the Japanese.

The elderly/retirees in this country didn't construct the tax code. Nor should they suffer by it.

To burden children with your presence in order to avoid "sticking taxpayers with the cost" is quite honestly one of the most fucked-up ideas I've ever heard.

Not meaning to direct this at you personally.

Strangers have more obligation to pay for our care when we're elderly than do our kids?

Well isn't that part of WHAT THE FUCK the ACA (Obamacare) is all about?

While working, we pay out the ass to Medicare and Social Security. THEN we enroll with Medicaid.

What the fuck is that all about?

I'm a business owner. I see... no I PAY my employee's contributions to Medicare and Social Security. And I pay into the Unemployment Compensation system. And as an EMPLOYEE I pay out the same bullshit!

I've spent the last 40 years paying into SS and Medicare. It's called FICA.

Well, FUCK FICA.

Hey- if you burden your children with yourself then you're nothing better than a white trailer trash bitch.

IF your children burden themselves with YOU... then you are one blessed and lucky motherfucker.

You see the difference?

And good children don't see helping their folks as burden, it's a privilege to be able to help in return.

More people would be in a position to help their families if they weren't bled out paying taxes to support government bureaucrats and strangers on entitlement programs.

 

[boedicca]

I adhere to the Ms. Jane Brody philosophy. I am, have always been, and will always be in my prime.

Besides, getting older beats the alternative.

Just sayin'.

How do you know "it beats the alternative?"

Why should Death be a Worst Alternative? Yes I realize there might not be a message board in the Great Beyond, but that doesn't mean it might be All Bad.

Gasp! No message board?!?! Now I'm definitely going to have to live forever!

What if living on a message board is one's final reward? USMB: heaven, hell, or purgatory?

 

[Samson]

What is living on a message board is one's final reward? USMB: heaven, hell, or purgatory?

BTW: This would make a great Twilight Zone Episode.

I'd mention how such a post-life arrangement would be moderated, but I don't want to risk banishment.

 

[boedicca]

What is living on a message board is one's final reward? USMB: heaven, hell, or purgatory?

BTW: This would make a great Twilight Zone Episode.

I'd mention how such a post-life arrangement would be moderated, but I don't want to risk banishment.

Oh, it's so obvious:

The heaven board wouldn't require any moderation due to everyone being perfect.

The purgatory board would have strict, but fair moderators.

The hell board - everyone would be a moderator but the rules would be constantly changing so that every decision was fucked up. And there would be only one, infinitely long nested quote post.

 

[Samson]

The heaven board wouldn't require any moderation due to everyone being perfect.

The purgatory board would have strict, but fair moderators.

The hell board - everyone would be a moderator but the rules would be constantly changing so that every decision was fucked up. And there would be only one, infinitely long nested quote post.

Both Heavenly and Hellish USMB sound equally boring, offering a Final Irony.

 

[Foxfyre]

What is everyone's opinion on acting older? My grandparents seemed to accept acting older in dress, behavior and socially. I see more rebels in that regard these days.

It's kind of a No Win. I mean which is worse? Looking older and acting older? Or looking older and trying to act "younger"? Either way you lose, lol. I mean look at some of the aging Celebs. Some manage to pull it off. But, some keep trying to look like they did when they were 20 and they just look like tired , worn out versions of their former selves. Kind of a tough balancing act.
However, my advice, is just be who you ARE and heck with what people think. If you like wearing a granny robe and slippers, well heck you have done the walk of life so wear what you want. If you want to wear leather and drive a Harley, then go for it.

That's pretty much my philosophy. Why should there be a cultural expectation of what a person at a certain age MUST be? Those of us who wish to be courteous to others and make a favorable impression will dress appropriately for social occasions, use socially acceptable speech, and mind our manners. Otherwise, we should all dress, speak, and live a lifestyle that feels the most comfortable, that feels the most right, that makes us happiest. At any age.

The fact is, getting older does not lessen our desire to look good in the least. We know we aren't the hard body beauty or stud of our youth, if we ever were , but we still want to be handsome/attractive/appealing/lovable and make a favorable impression when we're out in public especially. Now admittedly there is something that just looks wrong about the 65-yr-old gal in a tank top, mini skirt and go-go boots. But if it makes her happy. . . . .why not?

 

[Bill Angel]

What is everyone's opinion on acting older? My grandparents seemed to accept acting older in dress, behavior and socially. I see more rebels in that regard these days.

It's kind of a No Win. I mean which is worse? Looking older and acting older? Or looking older and trying to act "younger"? Either way you lose, lol. I mean look at some of the aging Celebs. Some manage to pull it off. But, some keep trying to look like they did when they were 20 and they just look like tired , worn out versions of their former selves. Kind of a tough balancing act.
However, my advice, is just be who you ARE and heck with what people think. If you like wearing a granny robe and slippers, well heck you have done the walk of life so wear what you want. If you want to wear leather and drive a Harley, then go for it.

That's pretty much my philosophy. Why should there be a cultural expectation of what a person at a certain age MUST be? Those of us who wish to be courteous to others and make a favorable impression will dress appropriately for social occasions, use socially acceptable speech, and mind our manners. Otherwise, we should all dress, speak, and live a lifestyle that feels the most comfortable, that feels the most right, that makes us happiest. At any age.

The fact is, getting older does not lessen our desire to look good in the least. We know we aren't the hard body beauty or stud of our youth, if we ever were , but we still want to be handsome/attractive/appealing/lovable and make a favorable impression when we're out in public especially. Now admittedly there is something that just looks wrong about the 65-yr-old gal in a tank top, mini skirt and go-go boots. But if it makes her happy. . . . .why not?

I agree, and it is interesting what "fashion statements" an older person might make at social gatherings, as this woman did when she attended a neighborhood festival:

Abell Community Street Fair

Abell Community Street Fair

 

[saveliberty]

My maternal grandma was not afraid of color in her decorating or clothing. The other grandma was a gray-blue perm gal.

 

[Foxfyre]

The most difficult thing for me to accept in my senior years is the feeling of gradually being put out to pasture and no longer regarded as an equal. Some years back I got into some on line activities with much younger people--even kids--interactive games and such. As long as they didn't know how old I was, they just assumed I was one of them and I was treated like everybody else and included in everything. But if I revealed my actual age, it changed. There was a kind of deference shown and everybody was still friendly and pleasant, but it was made obvious that I was not one of them. I was no longer as capable, as smart, as proficient. And it wasn't as much fun for me. So I lied a lot.

But in person, it is much harder to conceal one's generation. And we are caught in a kind of dichotomy. We want to be appreciated for our long experience and the wisdom obtained from that. But we don't really want to be treated differently either.

 

[Bill Angel]

I suppose the young could work as hard as me, but I'm either going to have to sandbag or they have to pick up the pace. I have to admit, my video games skills are poor. Oh the horror!

My video games skills are pretty darn good. I love playing games like Bejeweled and Zuma that require speed, quick thinking, sharp observation, and quick hand/eye coordination. I think they really are a kind of beneficial mental exercise for us 'older' folks. I love most games actually, working puzzles, and can beat just about anybody at Scrabble. I do mourn the fact that physical limitations prevent me from being a competent bowler, square dancer, or volleyball player these days.

I've become a very engaged crossword puzzle player. I do at least six a day on my tablet computer. Sometimes when I wake up in the middle of the night I do them. Why? Besides the benefits of mental exercise that you mentioned, it helps to take my mind off of the frustrations and regrets that have accumulated after 66 years of living.

 

[R.D.]

BS you raise kids to earn a good income and move in with them...

Two of my kids are earning more than dear old dad. Moving in with them is the last thing I'd impose upon them. Would never ask them for a dime. Altho one still owes me $2,500 from about 5 years ago LOL.

Not meaning to direct this at you personally, but I find this mindset troubling in light of these two facts:

I'd much rather retired folks moved in with their kids and were supported by their kids rather than sticking taxpayers with the cost. I'm planning on that with my parents/in-laws when the time comes.

Well y'know... thanks for that. In some cultures such as Japan, they accept their bound duty to care for elderly family.

But this is the U.S. where neither culture nor duty exist. At least not on the level of the Japanese.

The elderly/retirees in this country didn't construct the tax code. Nor should they suffer by it.

To burden children with your presence in order to avoid "sticking taxpayers with the cost" is quite honestly one of the most fucked-up ideas I've ever heard.

Not meaning to direct this at you personally.

Strangers have more obligation to pay for our care when we're elderly than do our kids?

Well isn't that part of WHAT THE FUCK the ACA (Obamacare) is all about?

While working, we pay out the ass to Medicare and Social Security. THEN we enroll with Medicaid.

What the fuck is that all about?

I'm a business owner. I see... no I PAY my employee's contributions to Medicare and Social Security. And I pay into the Unemployment Compensation system. And as an EMPLOYEE I pay out the same bullshit!

I've spent the last 40 years paying into SS and Medicare. It's called FICA.

Well, FUCK FICA.

Hey- if you burden your children with yourself then you're nothing better than a white trailer trash bitch.

IF your children burden themselves with YOU... then you are one blessed and lucky motherfucker.

You see the difference?

That is pretty much all think about as I age, the burden to my kids. We bought our home 15 years ago with the thought process that we can grow old in it an keep the family home for future grandkids to visit.

As others have mentioned, we always feel young so acting my age and growing old gracefully is important For two reasons...I laugh at people who carryon as if it were 30 years ago and I dont want some dummy laughing at me