Thoreau's Comic Book: Clayface

Discussion in 'USMB Lounge' started by Abishai100, Dec 11, 2017.

  1. Abishai100

    Abishai100 VIP Member

    Sep 22, 2013
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    The iconic American philosopher-writer Henry David Thoreau gave the world the ultimate naturalism meditation (presented in Western prose of course) in Walden, a treatise on man's bond to nature.

    Since the release of Thoreau's work, many eco-activists have conjectured about the reach of political philosophy for modern industrialization-related eco-pollution concerns and man's 'disattachment' from Mother Nature.

    I thought I'd add my two cents with this new comic book vignette perfect for Thoreau's brand of 'naturalism-consciousness,' in which an idealistic FBI crime-detective named Tina contends with a toxic-poisoned mutant named Clayface (borrowed name and visage from the DC Comics super-villain symbolizing 'unnatural consciousness').


    Tina realized she would have to muster all her wits to deal with Clayface who had already destroyed a major Washington, D.C. shopping center as well as Central Park in NYC. Clayface had the uncanny ability to shape-shift since he was mutated by toxic-waste. Once an employee of Nygma Science, Roger Mookie was accidentally exposed to the waste of an experimental study involving transforming chemicals and mutated into the nefarious 'Clayface.' Clayface could make weapons-on-the-fly with flesh-clay from his own shape-shifting body, since he was no longer a 'normal guy' named Roger.

    CLAYFACE: Come closer, and I'll wrap your head in clay.
    COP: You're hideous! Why are you completely made of clay, man?
    CLAYFACE: I was once a normal man (like you!), but toxic-waste mutated me.
    COP: Oh, so now society is to blame for your disfigurement, eh?
    CLAYFACE: No, copper. I blame you...personally (and only you!).
    COP: Alright, I didn't sign up for this (freak!); I'm going to flee.
    CLAYFACE: Go ahead and flee, but I'll find you, and my ugliness will eat your conscience.
    COP: Yeah sure, I'll be sure to write to my Congressman about toxic-waste!

    Tina knew she could subdue Clayface if she could set a pattern to his malicious mischief. Clayface liked scaring people with his misshapen body --- to remind them that toxic-waste had converted him into a misshapen 'sponge for evil.' Tina decided to set a trap in Yellowstone National Park by placing an editorial in the newspaper which read, "I challenge the shape-shifting Clayface to defend his eco-oriented 'principles' at Yellowstone on Earth Day!" Tina then camped out at Yellowstone the night before the challenge-date and prepared boards with drawings of nature painted on them.

    CLAYFACE: Why did you dare me to come out here, detective?
    TINA: Roger, I know you're in pain and resent your hideous mutation.
    CLAYFACE: It's toxic-waste that did this to me, detective...
    TINA: I know, and now you're full of ugly holes, since you're...all clay!
    CLAYFACE: I feel like I'm made out of mud...or worse.
    TINA: Look at these paintings of nature I brought and tell me what you think.
    CLAYFACE: I see images of an Earth forgotten by God (and man).
    TINA: God cares about you, Clayface; consider the haven of Arkham Asylum.
    CLAYFACE: What's in Arkham that I can't find meditating (alone) in Yellowstone?
    TINA: Well, for one thing, Arkham doctors can address your new fear of ugliness!
    CLAYFACE: I'm full of holes, detective...
    TINA: If I can comfort you, will you consider letting me take you (personally) to Arkham?
    CLAYFACE: I suppose I can agree that Arkham can serve as a 'pollution-free home.'
    TINA: We'll find democratic-orderlies for you (Roger) Arkham Asylum!



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