Stick a Fork In John Kerry--He's Done

Discussion in 'Current Events' started by Stephanie, Jan 22, 2006.

  1. Stephanie
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    Stephanie Diamond Member Supporting Member

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    The Boston Herald is a paid site, I got this from another board I belong to.. Way too funny.lol
    http://news.bostonherald.com/columnists/view.bg?articleid=122389
    Stick a Fork In John Kerry--He's Done
    Boston Herald ^ | 01/22/06 | Howie Carr

    John F. Kerry still dreams of becoming the next John F. Kennedy, but he’ll never even reach Ted Kennedy heights, or is it depths?

    Not that anyone would ever dare tell Liveshot this. Seldom is heard a discouraging word when you’re a 62-year-old gigolo married to a 67-year-old gold digger worth close to $1 billion.

    Ever more delusional, Kerry still fancies that his next job is commander-in-chief. He refuses to face the reality that he’s already well into his final role on the public stage.

    He has become the Mike Dukakis of the 21st century.

    John Kerry, reporting for doody - er, make that, duty.

    The twilight of John Kerry is nicely sketched in an amusing new story about him in GQ, by a writer named Michael Crowley. Everyone in Massachusetts, including his ostensible supporters, knows what a complete fraud Kerry is and always has been, but it’s nice to see the news again reaching a national audience, even if it’s just in a fashion magazine for fops.

    Poor John. Lately he’s been on his foreign tour - don’t ask me where; all I do is read the headlines, roll my eyes and immediately turn the page - and he’s still getting slammed back home.

    One of the set pieces in the GQ story concerns a speech Mama T’s boy toy made at Georgetown University. It was pretty good, the writer says, but then the junior senator began taking questions from the students.

    “The pain of it all came rushing back,” he writes. “Kerry’s responses were brutally long-winded, as if he were intent on slowly suffocating their earnestness with leaden filibusters. Eyes glazed. Yawns unfolded. Even the kids at the mike shifted their weight impatiently.”

    Anyone who has ever suffered through a live appearance by Liveshot knows exactly this feeling. After 22 years in the Senate, the scion of the Forbes fortune is an empty suit’s empty suit, a windbag di tutti windbags.

    Here’s another quote from the GQ piece, from an anonymous Senate staffer:

    “There is this weird cognitive dissonance. You see Kerry in the Dirksen (Senate Office Building) cafeteria getting a salad, and you think, You were inches from becoming president, and now you’re getting your own salad. And it’s not even a good salad.”

    Thank God - and the late Sen. Heinz’s trust fund - the junior senator will soon be back in his Sperry Topsiders biking down Hulbert Avenue on Nantucket, and if this parvenu wage slave had ever been to the Chanticleer Inn, he would know that their lobster salads are . . . to die for!

    The GQ story mentions a radio interview in which an NYU professor says Kerry said he thinks the 2004 election was “stolen.” Apparently Kerry’s office denies this, but everyone here knows Kerry’s people have been saying the same thing for almost a year.

    Amazing, isn’t it? The guy loses by 3 million votes, and he thinks it was “stolen.” It’s beyond cognitive dissonance. If his second wife hadn’t inherited a billion dollars, guys in white coats would be sneaking up behind him with a net.

    But Kerry is running again, it’s his destiny, it’s why his initials are JFK. That’s why his equally crazy younger brother Cam Kerry wanted to run for secretary of state this year, to set himself up to run for what would have been the open “Kerry” Senate seat in 2008.

    Anyway, it’s a funny story in GQ, and I can only hope it’s read by one group of people in particular - Kerry’s fellow snot-nosed, trust-funded Birkenstock-wearing layabouts who refuse to peel those absurd Kerry-Edwards bumper stickers off their new Volvos.
     
  2. Mr. H.
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    Mr. H. Diamond Member

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    The oldest retrievable non-replied to thread with the word "fork" in it.

    Damn that Stephanie - bitch got staying power. :thup:
     
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  3. toxicmedia
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    toxicmedia Gold Member

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    Is this article 9 years old?

    EDIT******This thread is 9 years old!

    Crap, how old is Stephanie?
     
  4. Mr. H.
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    Mr. H. Diamond Member

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    She's old enough to know what's right, but young enough not to choose it. :slap:
     
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