Satanic nuns will play for the Dodgers

[Votto]

The satanic drag nuns whom the Los Angeles Dodgers endorsed last season, will now suit up and play for them.

After spending a record 243 quadrillion dollars on the team to finally win a World Series, the franchise announced the nuns will be allowed to play in games where other teams are losing by 15 runs or more, which is estimated to be around 50 games this year.

"We are absolutely giddy to accept the invitation to make the MLB more liberated, uninhibited, and wild than it has ever been before! Get ready, gamers, and bring your gloves and bats -- because we're bad girls!"

It was decided that this would be the only way to keep fan interest in the blow out games.

Additionally, after each game, the two nuns will read to children under 5 years old for free at the stadium library where they can give their hearts to satan.