teapartysamurai
Gold Member
- Mar 27, 2010
- 20,056
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Makes some good points!
Santa Claus: Conservative
Great stuff! He has a point. You don't get toys if you are a bad boy or girl, sitting in your own fillth demanding other people pay your bills. You have to be a GOOD boy or girl, say your prayers and mind your mommy and daddy .
He forgot to add St. Nicholas is a Saint which means Liberals want him dead for being a Christian.
St. Nicholas Center ::: Who is St. Nicholas?
Yep, I think that clinches the argument. Santa Claus is a conservative, so OWS better start having sit ins at the North Pole!
In a world awash in socialism and socialist agitators (Im looking at you, Occupy Wall Street, MSNBC ) its good to know at least Santa Claus is kicking it old school. Thats right, Saint Nick is a conservative through and through, in spite of the red get-up.
Think about it: Santa doesnt distribute toys in the willy-nilly, every-ones-a winner liberal fashion. No, sir, you have to earn your toys from him through decent behavior. Naughty boys net no toys. If Santa were a liberal he would give everyone a toy, whether they deserved it or not, and it would be the same toy, shoddily assembled by some government bureaucrat instead of crack private-sector elfin expertise.
Which brings us to another point Santa is obviously independently wealthy (excellent capitalist creds) and is therefore able to write off his yearly sojourn as a massive and merry act of philanthropy, perfectly in keeping with the conservative philosophy of private charity over government largesse.
And look at his girth! Santa is Michelle Obamas worse nightmare? No carrot sticks and rice cakes for Santa; hes a fat man and happy for it (and why not? I hear Mrs. Claus is a chubby chaser). Cookies and milk is all the fuel he needs, and God, isnt that awesome?
And theres his ride a small herd of reindeer gives off plenty of CO2 emissions, trust me. Im sure Santas sleigh would violate every clean air standard on the planet, but he doesnt care. For one night a year, Santas sleigh the pimpinist ride around, soaring high above the invasive x-rays and cold hands of the TSA.
Santa Claus: Conservative
Great stuff! He has a point. You don't get toys if you are a bad boy or girl, sitting in your own fillth demanding other people pay your bills. You have to be a GOOD boy or girl, say your prayers and mind your mommy and daddy .
He forgot to add St. Nicholas is a Saint which means Liberals want him dead for being a Christian.
St. Nicholas Center ::: Who is St. Nicholas?
Yep, I think that clinches the argument. Santa Claus is a conservative, so OWS better start having sit ins at the North Pole!