Obama dies and finds himself before the Pearly Gates. He is very excited; all his life he's had a secret wish & longed to meet the Prophet Mohammed. Having arrived at the Gates of Heaven, Barack meets a man with a beard. 'Are you Mohammed?' he asks. 'No, my son, I am Peter. Mohammed is higher up.' Peter then points to a ladder that rises into the clouds. Delighted that Mohammed should be higher than Peter, Obama climbs the ladder in great strides, climbs through the clouds coming to a room where he meets another bearded man. He asks again, 'Are you Mohammed?' 'No, I am Moses. Mohammed is higher still.' Exhausted, but with a heart full of joy he climbs the ladder; yet again, he discovers an even larger room where he meets another man with a beard. Full of hope, he asks again, 'Are you Mohammed?' 'No, I am Jesus... You will find Mohammed higher up.' Mohammed higher than Jesus! Man! Obama can hardly contain his delight and climbs and climbs, ever higher. Once again, he reaches a larger room where he meets a man with a beard and repeats his question: 'Are you Mohammed?' he gasps as he is, by now, totally out of breath from all his climbing. 'No, my son.... I am Almighty God. But you look exhausted. Would you like a cup of coffee..?' 'Yes! Please, my Lord,' Obama exclaims. God looks behind him, claps his hands and yells out: 'Hey Mohammed-- two coffees!'