DiamondDave
Army Vet
But that is NOT a judge's responsibility UNLESS the child is a ward of the court, which would happen if the parent is deemed unfit... and making a decision for your child that the child may or may not agree with does not make a parent unfit... it is the responsibility of the parent, for their child's care and well being, period... there is no argument of that unless you deem the minor/child emancipated from the parents or an adult
A judge does not have to intervene unless you are trying to make the government 'all powerful' with it's tendrils into even this very personal aspect of your family life and family responsibilities
But it IS a judge's province if the child can't go to the parent. In your scenario, if the child doesn't tell the parent, that's it...she has no options. The same way I don't think you can force a couple to have a good relationship by making them consult and agree on an abortion, I don't believe we can force our kids to confide in us. Believe me... I wish I could.
I agree on all points.
I'm not sure where I strike the balance on the morning after though. In general, I think that abortions by minors are medical procedures and should follow the strictures of all other medical procedures whatever they are. (Parental consent/notification -- judicial bypass). The pill presents a problem for me because it is not an invasive medical procedure. But, I'm not sure that it is without risk. If there is a substantial risk to the health of the girl, shouldn't the parents know in case something goes wrong? (I think hemorrhage is a possibility?). I would feel awful if my daughter were hemorrhaging and died and I knew nothing about any of it. Obviously.
I'm torn. Not sure what the right answer should be. I understand Dave's arguments and yours Jillian. I'm just not sure where I'm comfortable with that balance. If I was convinced it was as safe as aspirin, then I would make it legal.
Even Aspirin isn't safe sometimes. And if your child is also smoking, the pill could lead to stroke or heart attack... blood clots being far more likely than hemmorhage.... but you know what, they put all kinds of stuff in their bodies.... If they don't have to sneak around to get this stuff, they're more likely to be given proper medical advice and what to look for in terms of possible side effects. Plus, if they know their doctor doesn't have to tell their parents, I think they're more likely to call the doctor in the event something doesn't feel right after.
Am I right? Wrong? I don't know...
That's right jill.. even in that scenario the kid does not have the authority to use such a medication or have such a procedure given to them... because they are not adults... and until they are adults, just as in other medical and medicinal cases, the parents are the responsible party... they want that responsibility to get this or another procedure without parental consent, go to a lawyer and get emancipated and take responsibility for every aspect of their lives
But the thing is that a child that CAN NOT go to the parent and WILL NOT go to the parent are 2 different things... if a child truly cannot go to the parent, that is the beginning grounds right there anyway for the courts taking custody away from that parent.. and you know and i know that a child will say "I cannot" when they really mean "I will not" or "I am to scared to" or "I know I won't agree with mom and/or dad and I want MY way"
We don't have to force our kids to confide in us (or maybe in some cases, can't)... but that does not take the responsibility out of the adult's hands and put it into the case of a minor for their own care and well being
And as for the 'couple'.. if their adults, that is indeed their responsibility.. that has no relevance on the situation we are discussing here... which is parental responsibility and decision making for minors
This is exactly why we have the differences between minor and adult.. between fit and unfit.. and remember, just because a parent does not agree with what the minor wants, does not inherently make them unfit and defaulting the decision making responsibility back upon the minor