Are you going to heaven?

[Ernie S.]

Seriously, I figure if He can forgive me for some big mistakes in my past and look at what I've become since, I have a pretty good shot. I'm at about the 50/50 point now. If I last another 20 years I should be in.

 

[Truthseeker420]

Wait a minute! I'm confused...

Which is it, no virgins in heaven or no virgins in hell?

Where do virgins go when they die?

First, define 'virgin'.

People that live in Virginia?

 

[syrenn]

you think it's likely?

I go all the time.... every time i have wild raucous sex and visit the spa..... aaahhh heaven.


Then again.... holding a litter of kittens and having a fine meal is pretty good to. Heh...i think i could make a pretty long list of ..... heaven.

First, define 'kittens'.

A little better understanding of what you mean by a 'litter' might also come in handy.....

You know...soft, warm, purring balls of fur.

 

[Ernie S.]

Correct. They don't have that in hell.

No virgins either.

Wait a minute! I'm confused...

Which is it, no virgins in heaven or no virgins in hell?

There may be virgins in Heaven, but I doubt, if there are any in hell,EDIT: unless they're just plain fugly.

 

[AVG-JOE]

How about the creeps with very public jail-house conversions right before execution?

When I was evangelizing for Jesus, I always told people that the only difference between Christians and those destined for an eternity in Hell was a request for forgiveness that began with an acknowledgement of sin, and yes, if he was sincere when he gave his heart to Jesus, Ted Bundy would be in Heaven.

What do y'all think?

 

[Ernie S.]

How about instead of worrying about going to heaven, we worry about making earth heaven instead?

Making Earth into heaven would require doing things that would send me to hell.

That would make a GREAT T-shirt!

I invented "Have a nice day" too.

 

[AVG-JOE]

No virgins either.

Wait a minute! I'm confused...

Which is it, no virgins in heaven or no virgins in hell?

There may be virgins in Heaven, but I doubt, if there are any in hell, they're just plain fugly.

On the other hand, the lonely virgin, pining for love and wishing for lust may be it's own special hell for some.

 

[AVG-JOE]

Making Earth into heaven would require doing things that would send me to hell.

That would make a GREAT T-shirt!

I invented "Have a nice day" too.

You rock, dude! I use that one all the time!

Kudos!

 

[Ernie S.]

I go all the time.... every time i have wild raucous sex and visit the spa..... aaahhh heaven.


Then again.... holding a litter of kittens and having a fine meal is pretty good to. Heh...i think i could make a pretty long list of ..... heaven.

First, define 'kittens'.

A little better understanding of what you mean by a 'litter' might also come in handy.....

You know...soft, warm, purring balls of fur.

Mine don't purr. How about yours, Joe?

 

[AVG-JOE]

First, define 'kittens'.

A little better understanding of what you mean by a 'litter' might also come in handy.....

You know...soft, warm, purring balls of fur.

Mine don't purr. How about yours, Joe?

Depends on who's holding them, I suppose.

 

[Ernie S.]

How about the creeps with very public jail-house conversions right before execution?

When I was evangelizing for Jesus, I always told people that the only difference between Christians and those destined for an eternity in Hell was a request for forgiveness that began with an acknowledgement of sin, and yes, if he was sincere when he gave his heart to Jesus, Ted Bundy will be in Heaven.

What do y'all think?

I think you were trying to comfort them, but I'm pretty sure Ted Bundy didn't make it.

 

[AVG-JOE]

How about the creeps with very public jail-house conversions right before execution?

When I was evangelizing for Jesus, I always told people that the only difference between Christians and those destined for an eternity in Hell was a request for forgiveness that began with an acknowledgement of sin, and yes, if he was sincere when he gave his heart to Jesus, Ted Bundy will be in Heaven.

What do y'all think?

I think you were trying to comfort them, but I'm pretty sure Ted Bundy didn't make it.

I wasn't trying to comfort anyone. I was trying to convert them by explaining that their sins, no matter how bad they thought they were, were forgivable by God through Jesus.

It was a pretty good pitch..... "if Bundy can theoretically get to heaven on forgiveness by Jesus, you will be easy for Him, just ask."

 

[Ernie S.]

A good sell, I guess, but do you actually believe that Bundy could make Heaven?
I mean, I suppose it could be possible, but... Well I guess St Peter could tell how sincere he was.

 

[AVG-JOE]

A good sell, I guess, but do you actually believe that Bundy could make Heaven?
I mean, I suppose it could be possible, but... Well I guess St Peter could tell how sincere he was.

At this point in history, you're asking the wrong guy... I no longer believe ANY humans are bound for Heaven upon their deaths. I no longer believe Heaven exists.

At the time, I believed that God was the judge and Bundy had no better or worse shot at going to Heaven than any other sinner who simply and sincerely asked Jesus to go.

 

[Ernie S.]

What prompted the profound change, if I may ask?

 

[AVG-JOE]

What prompted the profound change, if I may ask?

Short answer is a better understanding of history and my own physical world made believing The Bible difficult. Once I discovered that I couldn't believe The Bible, I found it impossible to believe in The Bible.

To be honest, I kind of miss my religion and the comforting thoughts of the next life being the one that counted. It was easy.

 

[Truthseeker420]

What prompted the profound change, if I may ask?

Short answer is a better understanding of history and my own physical world made believing The Bible difficult. Once I discovered that I couldn't believe The Bible, I found it impossible to believe in The Bible.

To be honest, I kind of miss my religion and the comforting thoughts of the next life being the one that counted. It was easy.

Yes wouldn't it be easy if God took care of everthing and we got eternal life in heaven.

 

[Sherry]

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AZQxH_8raCI]Spirit In The Sky Norman Greenbaum - YouTube[/ame]

 

[Truthseeker420]

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kqkZn_SridQ&feature=related]Nirvana Lake of Fire - YouTube[/ame]

 

[AVG-JOE]

Those two posts are proof that good music is good music. Both of those songs are in my playlist.