A friend died today

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by koshergrl, May 15, 2012.

  1. koshergrl
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    koshergrl Diamond Member

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    The mother of the boy who stayed with me this winter (my kids' older brother's mom). He isn't with me now, he went home, she came to get him the week after Easter, so at least he had a few weeks with her.

    Her two older sons were mad at her and have been treating her very harshly since she left her husband and started seeing another man. She was very happy when she died (car wreck), had a lovely mother's day she said.

    I haven't been able to reach the boy...I've left him messages, called his grandparents (who aren't picking up yet). Poor, poor boys....the one I had was closest to her, and this is going to ruin him.
     
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  2. BDBoop
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    BDBoop BANNED

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    Don't harsh my zen, Jen!
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    I'm so sorry for your loss. How old are her sons?
     
  3. koshergrl
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    koshergrl Diamond Member

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    14 and 15 and 18, and troubled already. This is a bad thing for anyone..for the two younger, it's absolutely devastating. They were barely hanging on as it was..this is going to ruin them. Forget about the rest of the school year, and they will probably never go back. Her ex was driving the car...and the chances are very good he was drunk, though maybe, just maybe, that particular nightmare will pass them by this time. It would be nice if every single strike that could possibly be made against kids wasn't actually made against them, they've got so many against them already. They're Indian, alcoholism, domestic violence, grinding poverty is their inheritance from both sides of the family. Plus one has a speech impediment, and their behavior issues means that neither one of them is functioning anywhere near grade level in any part of their lives, emotional, behavioral, or academic. I'm praying their dad will step up and stop drinking and be a father, but I doubt he will. I imagine he'll take the boys and the social security they will now receive...I doubt if he'll do anything else except continue to be an abusive, worthless pos.

    I just can't take them and I feel horrible..but they aren't good around my kids; their behavior is too extreme and I can't make that trade off...my kids' well being for theirs..especially when there are no guarantees that it would help them in the long run. They might still go off the rails, and then I've ransomed my kids' well-being for a pipe dream....

    But it just kills me.
     
  4. BDBoop
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    BDBoop BANNED

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    Don't harsh my zen, Jen!
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    All you can do (and I say that like it's the least you can do, when it is really the most you can do) is pray that another option will come to pass.
     
  5. Artevelde
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    Artevelde Senior Member

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    Sorry to hear that.
     
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  6. trams
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    trams Active Member

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    Sorry about your friend KG.
     
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  7. bigrebnc1775
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    bigrebnc1775 Diamond Member

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    My thoughts go out to the family .
     
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  8. editec
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    editec Mr. Forgot-it-All

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    Tragic.

    It really bites when you can see these human tragedies brewing and can't do anything about it, too.
     
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  9. Peach
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    Peach Gold Member

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    Mine also; sorry to learn of your loss, and the children's.
     
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  10. koshergrl
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    koshergrl Diamond Member

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    I have heard from the older brother, but not from the two younger. I imagine they're with their grandma and grandpa, and the rest of their mom's family.
     

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