Why Did They Bother? - Worst Song Cringefest Novelty Songs Ever Recorded.

[Oz and the Orchestra]

WARNING
There follows some of the most stomach-churning renditions ever recorded.
Includes some top artists - What were they thinking?
Exit. if you are of a mentally vulnerable disposition as any one of these could push you over the edge!

This jaw-dropping shock horror was quite incredibly the UK's entry for the 2006 Eurovision Song Contest.
I'm no prude but this?
Why didn't somebody strangle it at birth? Production managers? Musicians? The record company? The organisers of what is supposed to be an international family entertainment music festival watched by multi-millions.

Why didn't somebody tell poor old Daz? - Who must have been going through a midlife crisis? The actual music is OK but everything else is just plain wrong, An overweight middle-aged white guy trying to rap, and gyrating with girls in school kid uniforms with police sirens wailing in the background. At one point he cries "No, no!" - about the only part of the song he gets right.
Thankfully the song tanked, but further gross embarrassment and humiliation came as a British contingent in the audience are seen flag-waving as the song ends - yea thanks, guys!

 

[Muhammed]

The actual music is OK

 

[fncceo]

 

[Oz and the Orchestra]

That is an old traditional cockney song in the same mould as "No We Aint Got No Bananas",

Apart from the odd classic like "Greensleeves" said to be written by HenryVIII for Ann Boleyn, and "Amazing Grace" written by a reformed slave owner, English Music was about the direst in the world.
It wasn't till given a transfusion by American Jazz, Gospel and Blues that English music transformed itself into a revolution sent back to the US and that took the world by storm in the 60's.

 

[fncceo]

That is an old traditional cockney song in the same mould as "No We Aint Got No Bananas",

Apart from the odd classic like "Greensleeves" said to be written by HenryVIII for Ann Boleyn, and "Amazing Grace" written by a reformed slave owner, English Music was about the direst in the world.
It wasn't till given a transfusion by American Jazz, Gospel and Blues that English music transformed itself into a revolution sent back to the US and that took the world by storm in the 60's.

Herman's Hermits were the part of the British Invasion that stepped on a land mine before they ever got off the beach.

 

[Oz and the Orchestra]

That is an old traditional cockney song in the same mould as "No We Aint Got No Bananas",

Apart from the odd classic like "Greensleeves" said to be written by HenryVIII for Ann Boleyn, and "Amazing Grace" written by a reformed slave owner, English Music was about the direst in the world.
It wasn't till given a transfusion by American Jazz, Gospel and Blues that English music transformed itself into a revolution sent back to the US and that took the world by storm in the 60's.

Herman's Hermits were the part of the British Invasion that stepped on a land mine before they ever got off the beach.

I'm really not having a go at the US National Anthem. As you all know I love the US, but this rendition of "The Star Spangled Banner" by Witney Houston actually makes me start to shake in fear of what notes are about to come next
She does not just murder the song but tortures, hangs, draws and quarters it before the actual murder with her vocal gymnastics a weapon that no human should be allowed to pocess.

What is that thing? - the mouth contortions she often uses that can have absolutely no influence on getting notes out of the mouth. Why does she do it?

They say that Bobby Brown was a bad egg and mistreated her, but I have to say that faced with ber rendition of below at 7am coming from the bathroom I would feel forced to strangle her and claim self defence.

 

[EvilEyeFleegle]

 

[Oz and the Orchestra]

KaJagoogoo - Too Shy
This brain knumbing diti by one-hit wonders Kajagoogoo I had thought was from the early seventies but my memory tricked me. it was infact from 1983 and described as 'New Wave' by some dick.
My brother actually knows the guy (keyboard player in vid) who wrote it.
My brother asked what the song was about, and he said - "Not a lot but I still get cheques for the Royalties!"


Reviews

Grampus Sep 28 2008

#@!!!?@#!!! Aaaarrrgghhh!!! Kerrriiissstt!!

Well that's my review for Kajagoogoo's "Too Shy" done with, now what shall I write about?

I suppose in a manufactured pop, here today / forgotten tomorrow kind of way "Too Shy" is palatable, but what does it tell you about this band when they have to back the single with an instrumental version of the same song? Even groundbreaking, essential singles like "Heartbreak Hotel", "Blowing In The Wind" or "She Loves You" would sound like a bag of bollocks without a vocal track, so it takes little to imagine how dire this is.

I can still remember these bleach-haired mop-tops prancing around on Top Of The Pops or Saturday morning kiddies programmes actually convinced they had a long-term future in the music business. (Who knows, maybe one of them has a job at Asda sticking price tags on CDs).

Sadly, in the interim period since Kajagoogoo's demise, this brand of brain-dead mulch has become more prevalent and the music buying public seems to be less and less demanding in terms of artistic quality and integrity and more concerned with facile surface appearance. One can only hope they all quickly go the same way as this truly horrible band.
RYM.