My experience has me concluding there may be various types of discernment, but definitely including spiritual discernment. Back story: Before Covid, when my mom had Alzheimer's, being out of town I couldn't visit her regularly. Fortunately, several siblings still lived in the same town, but I started thinking that perhaps there were elderly people in the town where I lived who had family who also lived too far to be regular visitors with their loved ones. The Church had a senior visitation ministry for this purpose, and in honor of my own mother I joined this ministry. Outside of family, I've never been comfortable touching people or people touching me. I manage the amenities, but that's about it.
Mary was mostly bedridden, couldn't talk any longer (a symptom my mother also had), and she was too weak to do much. On weather-perfect days, if she seemed alert, I would get her settled in a wheelchair, and we would walk through a nearby park. Mostly, she was in bed, so I read, said familiar prayers, and I told her about my day at school. I was company...but there wasn't a lot I could do with her--or for her for that matter.
One day a thought entered and filled my mind...I should stroke her hair. No. I don't go around stroking people's hair! The thought progressed to, "If her mother were here, she would stroke her hair." (My mother never stroked our hair.)
Mary was close to one hundred, so obviously her mother was long gone. Naturally, I left without stroking Mary's hair, and actually forgot it until my next visit. Again a thought, "If her mother were here, she would stroke her hair." I thought about it for awhile as the thought kept tugging at me. Yes, finally, I began stroking her hair. No, there were no magical smiles or physical reaction--she was beyond that...but she it seemed to relax her, so part of my visit with Mary became gently stroking her hair.
When I heard Mary had peacefully passed away, I immediately had the mental image/thought of Mary's mother stroking her hair. I went to her funeral, sitting quietly at the back of the church, not speaking with anyone, just praying and listening. The family member who spoke at the eulogy said Mary and her mother had been very close...one of his memories was of Mary's mother stroking Mary's hair.
No, not before, not after, have I ever felt the need to stroke the hair of anyone I was visiting. I never stroked my own mother's hair. (I don't think she would have liked it. Like me, she liked her space.)
