Newsom Bans High-Capacity Prayers

[Votto]

Gavin Newsom today signed an executive order banning high-capacity praying. The order went out after democrats began brainstorming on how to stop the Trump agenda. "You can't convince me for a second that Trump should even be alive right now!", barked Newsom. "I know none of us believe in a God, but hey, how else did our stooge miss so close on a sloped roof? Trump had to have had divine intervention. It is a miracle he is still alive, so I can only attribute it to prayer. But since most prayers go unanswered, at least all of mine, it must be high-capacity praying, you know the tongue talkers that talk faster than a Hispanic with their hair on fire because they are too high to use a crack pipe safely, and don't pretend like we have not all witnessed this on our streets of San Fran firsthand."

Legislation is now being presented to prohibit such praying, the penalty for which being thrown into a den of rabid drag queens at a local bath house if they violate the said law. No word yet on whether Daniel and his pet lions will also comply with the mandate. King Nebuchadnezzar could not be reached for comment.

 

[White 6]

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Gavin Newsom today signed an executive order banning high-capacity praying. The order went out after democrats began brainstorming on how to stop the Trump agenda. "You can't convince me for a second that Trump should even be alive right now!", barked Newsom. "I know none of us believe in a God, but hey, how else did our stooge miss so close on a sloped roof? Trump had to have had divine intervention. It is a miracle he is still alive, so I can only attribute it to prayer. But since most prayers go unanswered, at least all of mine, it must be high-capacity praying, you know the tongue talkers that talk faster than a Hispanic with their hair on fire because they are too high to use a crack pipe safely, and don't pretend like we have not all witnessed this on our streets firsthand."

Legislation is now being presented to prohibit such praying, the penalty of being thrown into a den of rabid drag queens at a local bath house if they violate the said law. No word yet on whether Daniel and his pet lions will also comply with the mandate. King Nebuchadnezzar could not be reached for comment.

No "spray and prey" in California, even in self-defense?

 

[Votto]

No "spray and prey" in California, even in self-defense?

Apparently not

No wonder Dims get so bent out of shape over saying, "Thoughts and prayers".

Who knew?